Four perky, clueless cheerleaders from the Happy Valley High Hamsters are mistakenly blamed by the meddling Church Ladies for the invasion of the "Internet smut" into their children's ... See full summary »
Four perky, clueless cheerleaders from the Happy Valley High Hamsters are mistakenly blamed by the meddling Church Ladies for the invasion of the "Internet smut" into their children's bedrooms. The Church Ladies hire Stephen, a sexually ambiguous teacher from the local Parochial Reform School, to teach the cheerleaders a lesson. But the cheerleaders have more than Stephen to worry about...lurking in the shadows is Mr. X, an evil mastermind who is using the cheerleaders as guinea pigs to test his Internet Zombie Domination software! Written by
During the ending credits it's shown that one of the topless body doubles during the catfight is Kira Reed Lorsch. The other body double was also the topless body double for Angela the head cheerleader. The uncredited body double was also in the lesbian dream sequence. See more »
During the catfight two of the cheerleaders tear each other's blouses off revealing their breasts. After the catfight all seven cheerleaders have their shirts intact. The topless shot was done by two obvious body doubles. See more »
In the ending credits the audio was provided by "Deaf Dorkelston", the "sword sound effects" by "Dave the Sword-Clanging Guy", the "fart noises" by "T.P. Brownpipe", and the "in house hamster milk" by "Dyslexia Cure For". See more »
I have suffered through "Orgy of the Dead", "Rock n'Roll Nightmare", and the entire "Slumber Party Massacre" Trilogy...but nothing, I mean nothing, can compare to the steaming pile of monkey crap that is "Cheerleader Ninjas."
I finished watching this no more than an hour ago and am still reeling from the horror. Let me say first and foremost, that I love bad movies; I think they are hilarious and cannot get enough of them but this...this made me hurt.
All you have to know is there are good cheerleaders (snobby, bitchy, condescending, all you could ask for) and then there are the bad cheerleaders (snobbier, bitchier, and really quite gross) led by the extremely gay Evil Stephan (you know he is gay because they mention it during the credits at least twice. Seriously). Then there are these nerds decked out in Star Trek apparel that do an awful lot of masturbating (with condiments no less) and more farting than all of the Farrelly brothers movies combined.
Sounds like good, IL' tasteless fun, right? Wrong.
The problem is the movie tries waaaaay too hard to be funny; this type of humor works great in films like "Porky's", hell even "American Pie" but these guys can't get the jokes, or anything else to work. Granted there is some, not much but some gratuitous nudity, including a quick beaver shot but it's hardly worth sitting through all 110 minutes of this crap. That's right, it's almost two hours long. Further proof than the best bad movies are 90 minutes or less.
Rent at your own risk.
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