- Darrin Marshall: This doesn't really have anything to do with you, pal.
- Jerry: Hey, watch your mouth, King Tuna!
- Officer Wilson: Okay, honey. You've got one telephone call. Okay? Just one.
- Darrin Marshall: You weren't talking like that before.
- Officer Wilson: I'm sorry. What?
- Darrin Marshall: What are you doing later?
- Officer Wilson: You!
- Lt.Drien: You been drinking, son?
- Darrin Marshall: Yeah. No! I haven't been drinking any alcohol, sir, just... olive oil.
- Lt.Drien: Olive oil? That doesn't sound too bright.
- Darrin Marshall: No. I'm not a smart guy.
- Monica: I want you to piss in all the hair care products your little heart desires. I'll still love you.