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Andrew (Jase Blankfort) and his older brother Carl (Trey Rogers) enjoy listening to ghost stories that the local undertaker (Frank Langella) tells them. One night he tells the tale of a local farmer whose wife gave birth to Siamese twins, one being good natured while the other was clearly evil. The farmer, ashamed of them, kept the twins locked in their room. Eventually the twins got sick and died together, so the farmer sawed them in half and buried the good twin in a cemetery and the bad twin in a shallow grave near the house. Later, Carl and his friends decide to hold a séance in the cemetery where the good twin is buried, but they unintentionally awaken the bad twin instead. Gradually, he possesses nearly everyone in town and it is up to young Andrew to stop him. Written by
Only aired once on Nickelodeon. It was never shown again due to an unprecedented number of complaints from parents who believed it was too frightening for a kid's network. Since then, Nickelodeon has refused to release it to the public in any form and continues to deny its existence. Random clips of the movie were released to YouTube, and eventually the full 1 hour movie was uploaded. However, the full version was removed by Viacom due to copyright. UPDATE: The film will be shown on Nickelodeon, Halloween night, October 31, 2011. Enjoy! See more »
"Cry Baby Lane" originally aired on Nickelodeon in 2000. Odds are the movie would have been forgotten by all but the most dedicated nineties nostalgist if something funny hadn't happened. It was never aired again. Rumor has it, the film was pulled from rotation because parents complained it was "too scary." "Cry Baby Lane" became sought-after by Nick devotees. The widely unseen film even spawned a (badly written) creepypasta. Finally, in 2011, a copy emerged and got plastered all over the internet, prompting Nickelodeon to reair it for the first time in ten years. Because I work at my own pace, I'm just now getting around to watching it.
Too scary? Not quite. As far as content goes, "Cry Baby Lane" is on par with an episode of "Are You Afraid of the Dark?" Like that fondly remembered show, "Cry Baby Lane" has an impressively creepy opening. Frank Langella recalls an urban legend about conjoined brothers kept in captivity by their father. As with most fictional twins, one is good and other is evil. When the boys die, the father separates the children, burying the good child in the public cemetery and the evil one in an isolated grave along the titular road. The story, darkly intoned, is played over images of black-and-white graveyards, abandoned homes, torn up stuffed animals, and bloody saws. This is doubtlessly the spookiest thing about "Cry Baby Lane." The rest plays out more typically. After hearing about the legend from the friendly mortician, ten-year old Andrew and his older, wrestling-obsessed, borderline abusive brother decide to perform a prank séance for the girls they like. A fake séance works as well as a real one, resurrecting the spirit of the evil twin. The ghost wreaks havoc on the small town, possessing most of the residents. This is a kid's movie so the evil manifest as petty prankery. Graffiti and mailbox tag are annoying but not exactly evil. The most malevolent actions are a burning boat and potentially deadly, if non-lethal, encounters with a bull and a harvester. Also, because this is a kid's movie, the story is primarily concerned with Andrew proving his courage to his bully brother.
The blatant attempts at horror fall flat. An encounter with a possessed cop doesn't pay off. The final, underground confrontation with the evil twin is hopelessly lame. "Cry Baby Lane" is probably more valuable as comedy. The apathetic father provides a few laughs, as does the overprotective mom and lazy gravedigger. The older brother's attempt to retell the legend while the girls interrupt him got a chuckle out of me. Other comic relief is less amusing, like the belligerent "Lord of the Rings"-obsessed kid or a giant girl-scout. The movie doesn't address a young boy spending so much time with a strange old man, even when the kid ends up in his underwear. I guess that's to be expected. Overall, the cult of "Cry Baby Lane" is mostly undeserved, even if that opening is still aces.
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