Waking Up in Reno (2002)
[Candy has slept with Darlene's husband]
Darlene: And you call yourself my friend.
Candy: Damn right I do.
Candy: You've got the world by its balls and you don't even know it!
Donnie Earl: How much does a girl like that cost you, Roy?
Candy: Damnit Lonnie Earl! It's none of your business!
Donnie Earl: Well I tried to leave...
Donnie Earl: Darlene and Roy have to sleep together. It'll make it even. It's like a dealer trade-in.
Donnie Earl: [in the convenient store] Yeah, ya just pile it on up here. Ole Lonnie Earl's got plenty of money. Yeah, I'm Mister Deep Pockets. Go ahead, Roy, put it on up here. Anybody else in here want me to buy them something?
Candy: You're like a mole. And I'm not talking about that THING on Cindy Crawford's face.
Darlene: You know, relationships can be a lot like a loaf of bread. At the beginning they're hot and fresh and you can always get a rise. But with time, if you don't knead them carefully, they grow old and stale. Now I know that life ain't no Easy Bake Oven. With the kids and my husband's job, it's almost as if we've forgotten to add the yeast. So I'm hoping the trip to Reno with our best friends, Candy & Roy, will be just what the doctor ordered.
Darlene: Damn it, this is the one thing I wanted to do on this trip. I told you I wanted to see it since 2nd grade when Miss Beechner told us about it. She said everyone thought God rested on the 7th day, but really He was working on his hobby carving the Grand Canyon.
Lonnie Earl III: Well, that's sweet, but uh, if you remember, Mrs. Beechner also kept her shit in a shoebox, remember that? So I don't know if that's the greatest authority in the world, ya know...
Lonnie Earl III: I ain't goin' to no shrink bitch Dr. Ruth woman that's gonna make us sit there and charge me an arm and a leg and a nut to say the shit that we can say to each each right here now.
Darlene: But she might not let you say something like you just said!
Lonnie Earl III: What'd I say?
Darlene: Well, if you can't hear yourself, then how are you gonna hear me, huh?
Candy: What do you mean you don't take bubble baths?
Darlene: 'Cuz my pooter infection stings worse than a swarm of bees.
Roy Kirkendall: Am I missing something here?
Darlene: Oh, for cryin' out loud, Roy, don't you see? This isn't Reno, this is Melrose Place!
Roy Kirkendall: Huh?
Bell Hop: Rise and shine! 2:15, breakfast time. Up up up, gentlemen. Come on, out of bed sleepy head. Good morning, good morning. Rise and shine, feet on the floor. Good morning, men. Wakey wakey, hand off snakey.