On his way to the premiere of his latest action movie, "Slow Torture", producer Peter Dragon accidentally picks up a hooker, Wendy Ward. Afterwards it becomes clear that the film is a disaster and Wendy is the only one who honestly tells Peter what's wrong with it. So, he takes her in and asks her to read a pile of scripts he has just purchased. She picks out the only good one: "Beverly Hills Gunclub".
Dragonfire's Christmas action extravaganza "Slow Torture" has tanked at the box office, leaving Peter to set his last hopes on the newly discovered script "Beverly Hills Gunclub". He hires the hooker who pointed this script out to him, Wendy Ward, and makes her vice president of production.
On Monday, Bobby G. tells Peter to raise $50 million before Friday or he won't back the "Beverly Hills Gunclub". Adam is facing major revisions to his script but gets writer's block. So, Wendy promises him a night to remember to encourage him. Jane, Peter's ex, tells him that an unexpected bout of love-making between them resulted in a pregnancy, and that her current husband Bobby G. is ecstatic to finally get an heir.
Sandra Bullock bursts into Peter Dragon's office having discovered that he is selling a sex tape secretly filmed while they were dating on his website. Adam Rafkin is in hospital suffering from a serious case of exhaustion and Peter's star Cole Riccardi visits him in the middle of the night to tell him he wants to come out of the closet.
Peter Dragon mouths off during a Washington court hearing, so Bobby G. forces him to hire crafty publicist Connie Hunt to work on his image. Meanwhile slick agent Marty Jordan dazzles Adam Rafkin and makes him part with his agent of ten years
A rumor about Peter Dragon ending up in hospital with a frog in his behind spreads like wildfire. Meanwhile, a blissfully unaware Peter picks up Jenny Johnson at a party and makes her Wendy's assistant. But then his ex wife, Jane, has a falling out with Bobby G and wants to return to Dragon.
It's the first day of shooting and naturally nothing goes right, leading to heart troubles for Peter Dragon. Holden is unhappy with the size of his codpiece and the fact his character wears a watch. Reagan is insecure and doesn't want anyone to look at her while she acts and a feud between Stuart and Jenny results in Holden getting drunk.
After being declared dead, Peter makes a miraculous recovery from his heart attack and starts going to baby class with his ex, Jane. Holden Van Dorn calls in the middle of the night to say director Titus Scroad is floating face up in his pool.
Stuart is considering a job offer to become head of comedy for UPN. Reagan is being difficult while shooting a sex scene for Beverly Hills Gun Club. Adam wants to get paid for all of his rewrites, but Peter talks him into accepting a producers credit instead.
After hiring the last available director on the list, Guy Rennolds and inadvertently investing his own money into Beverly Hills Gun Club, Peter is more adamant to finish the picture than ever. Just then it turns out the Rothstein brothers bought Adam Rafkin's script under a different title a year earlier and as such own the rights to the film.