Martin Blank is a professional assassin. He is sent on a mission to a small Detroit suburb, Grosse Pointe, and, by coincidence, his ten-year high school reunion party is taking place there at the same time.
Internet love connections and mail-order brides rarely ever work out, and John should have known. Having never been lucky in the game of love and tired of waiting for the perfect woman to come along, John decides to take his chances and orders a mail-order bride from Russia online. At first, things seem perfect: his new bride Nadia is a gorgeous woman, and although she may not speak much English, her skills in the bedroom more than make up for any communication problems. When Nadia's 'cousins' unexpectedly arrive to celebrate her birthday, John is drawn into their web of corruption and crime. Written by
This film would have played better as a romantic comedy. Instead it was neither one thing nor another. All the performances were good, but somehow it missed the mark. More like a satire of an Alfred Hitchcock thriller. The plot was too silly for a thriller, the characters were caricatures and the uptight bank clerk would have gone to the police immediately they demanded cash. As a comedy, they could have got away with a preposterous plot and the equally preposterous ending, but as a thriller, it simply fell flat.
Nicole Kidman can successfully play the sort of girl who could be a real head turner if she didn't dress like trash, combed her hair, got washed, and stopped lighting one cigarette from another. The scenes of her puffing away on a cigarette casually hanging from the side of her mouth were hilarious. She probably substituted flea market perfume for deodorant. The two Russian accomplices were also good, and Ben Chaplin was suitably uptight as the "victim". At first I thought he was too handsome to get a mail order bride, but to have made him a geek would have been too predictable. There are many handsome and successful men who just seem to strike out with the ladies.
Overall, I would rate this OK if you have absolutely nothing better to do.
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