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|Index||25 reviews in total|
I'm sorry but I have to say that this film fills me with so much joy! 20 years ago i watched this film as an innocent, now, whenever this cynical and weary mind needs to remember how good life is, i watch the boys in blue and all is well with the world. Its funny, its slapstick, its cannon and ball! God bless you Tommy Cannon and Bobby Ball. I, for one, salute you
I remember going to see this as a kid and at the time (i was 11) I loved it. Having seen it again recently I'm sorry to say that I again loved it. I know it's a bad film but there's something about it (or that period) that fills me with nostalgia and I suppose makes me smile. Ask a Policeman is of course a classic and far superior, however I'm afraid i like them both.....sorry
The utter, utter stupidity of this film is legendary. It is in fact known in the UK (to the tiny, tiny, number of people that have ever seen or even remember it) as the worst British film ever. The cast is tiny, Cannon and Ball, God forgive them (no really, they may well go to hell for this) don't even look ashamed! And when I tell you that a major plot device involves... SPOILER WARNING... a van disguised as a flying saucer THAT ACTUALLY FOOLS PEOPLE, you will know the level this film is pitching to. The only thing about the original was Will Hay, and he is very funny. The only thing about this is that someone lost about 75p making it. Hell, that's what? $1.50?
Utter tripe - a pointless remake of Will Hay's superb 'Ask A Policeman' starring the unfunny and charmless Cannon and Ball - a straight man and a 'comedian' whose one joke consists of snapping his braces. Don't bother.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
I can recall the day well. It was the summer of '82. Maggie Thatcher
was running rampage through both British Industry and the South
Atlantic. The dole queue had just topped 4 million and Arthur Scargill
had just declared class war on the monetarists. I was young, reckless
and madly in love. Her name was Elizabeth, daughter of a methodist
preacher and for our second date we decided to go to the movies.
There wasn't much on at the local flea pit that interested us, but she suggested we go and check out this film. After all, she said, it might be worth a laugh. Now I had my reservations. I didn't find Tommy and Bobby's TV offerings all that entertaining at the best of times (the term puerile springs to mind), but she was insistent, so we paid our money and entered the cinema.
I am still in therapy for what followed. There on the screen was a turgid rehash of every Will Hay film I have ever watched with a large number of Norman Wisdom 'gags' thrown in for good measure. Although I use the term Gags in the loosest possible terms. Will Hay and Norman Wisdom are funny, Cannon and Ball are not. From the wince-some traffic chaos at the start to the contrived slapstick car chase at the end we sat in awkward and embarrassed silence as Tommy and Bobby hammed their way through 50 year old jokes with complete disregard for timing or humour.
I would like to think it was just me having a sense of humour failure, but the cinema was half full at the start, nearly empty at the end and completely devoid of laughter throughout. We left the cinema feeling totally cheated and asked for our money back... and got it thanks to a a very sympathetic and embarrassed deputy manager.
In short, this is the worst film I have ever had the misfortune of watching and would rather eat my own genitalia rather than have to watch it again.
this is a remake of a great will hay comedy "Ask A Policeman".However when they wrote the script for this heap of rubbish they must have edited the humour out.Everything is simply dire.Cannon and Ball simply cannot act their way out of a paper bag.The story is feeble and fine actors such as Roy Kinnear and Eric Sykes are totally wasted.The photography is similar to what you would expect on a TV sitcom and what on earth Val Guest was doing directing this film is beyond my ken.Was he that desperate to make a film that he signed on to this.that the rank Organisation were prepared to distribute it says a lot about their ambition at the time.Little surprise that their distribution arm closed within a short time.Everyone associated with this should be ashamed of themselves.
Yes, I'm giving it 6 out of 10. I know it's not a classic in British
cinema like the likes of Hawk the Slayer and Time Bandits but it's
exactly what you would expect it to be. Tommy Cannon and Bobby Ball
making you laugh in a movie that is both ridiculous and achingly funny.
The gags and set pieces and innuendos come thick and fast. Bobby Ball
as the inept PC come Shopkeeper is just superb. The supporting cast of
top British comedians of the time make up the typical 'ooh i say' feel
of the classic British comedy. A favourite of mine and my sister's
video collections it is now available on DVD in the UK. Haven't seen it
advertised but I got mine from a local high street retailer for about a
Buy it and enjoy.
Contrary to other comments this is a British classic. If you're not a
Cannon & Ball fan - don't read on - in fact, why watch it??!! True
"CannonBallians" will relish in the banter between two of the top comedy
Never again, alas, will we see the likes of Roy Kinnear ("If I 'ad a secretary, I'd 'ave someone with something that bounces up & down when she's typing <wheezy laugh>") or Jon Pertwee ("That's very kind of you I'm sure - such heartwarming social sentiments are hard to find in these grasping avericious days") but they are immortalised here.
My personal favourite is the "somebody at the door" scene - but there are plenty of others to have you in stitches including "I'm going to lend you me Monarch of the Glen"!!!!
Top marks for a top film!
"Ask a Policeman" was Will Hay's third best movie, full of wit and
charm with three excellent lead actors. This remake is dreadful and it
is a huge shame that it was directed by Val Guest, considering he role
in making Hay such a star.
Cannon and Ball - dear God, no! Just get "Ask a Policeman", or better still get "Oh, Mr Porter", "Bones of the River" and "Convict 99" and see how Val Guest and Will Hay combine to make masterpieces of British cinema.
Pass this by - it is dreadful. Please, keep walking...no go on...nothing to see here...
I am disgusted that anyone could give this a 10. I was going to score it 3 simply out of respect to Val Guest, but the fact that people are scoring it 10 - rating it as highly as Citizen Kane, The Godfather Part 2, Shawshank Redemption, African Queen etc is ridiculous. The acting from C&B is atrocious. The script is ludicrous - even the verbatim lines taken from Will Hay's classic seem ludicrous when C&B utter them, and it looks awful. I have to give it 1 to cancel out undeserved 10s.
This is a truly dreadful film, and must surely constitute great veteran film-maker Val Guest's darkest hour. Terrible predictable dialogue, inept clowning, utterly unfunny. Unfortunately comedy can never be so bad it transcends awfulness (unlike films not intended to be funny, most famously 'Plan 9 from Outer Space'), they either work or they don't. This one was moribund from the start. Even the great duo of Morecambe & Wise never had much success with this type of film project, so imagine the hash the distinctly third rate Cannon and Ball make of things. Unfortunately even the presence of the usually reliable Roy Kinnear can not save this.
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