2.0/10
3,040
15 user 6 critic

Die Hard Dracula (1998)

| Comedy, Horror
A modern-day updating of the Dracula legend that finds Steven, a good-looking American hero devastated by the death of his girlfriend, wandering through Europe and looking for happiness. A ... See full summary »

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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
...
Denny Sachen ...
Kerry Dustin ...
Carla / Julia
Ernest M. Garcia ...
Chaba Hrotko ...
Count Dracula / Policeman Gabor / King Ludwig
...
Count Dracula (as Tom McGowan)
Talia Botone ...
Sonia
...
Dana
Peter Horak ...
Baker Fuksa
John Slavik ...
Dentist Hoble
Robert Coppola ...
Pub Owner Ivan
...
Father Stanislav
Paul Lackey ...
Butcher Wurst
Joseph Miksovsky ...
Mr. Hillman
Margie Windish ...
Mrs. Hillman
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Storyline

A modern-day updating of the Dracula legend that finds Steven, a good-looking American hero devastated by the death of his girlfriend, wandering through Europe and looking for happiness. A car accident leads him to a small town sitting literally in the shadow of Dracula's castle. The frightened villagers have been preyed upon for generations. Steven is stunned to discover Carla, the innkeeper's daughter looks identical to his dead girlfriend. When she begs for his assistance against the vampire, he agrees to help them. Together with Dr. Van Helsing, the most famous vampire killer of all time, he attacks Dracula using a variety of ingenious weapons against the supernatural. Dracula shows unusual powers that defeat them at every turn, including fireballs and lightning from his fingertips. He is constantly on a search for blood to satisfy his centuries-old bickering brides. When Dracula kidnaps Carla right out of her bed, Steven and Van Helsing desperately try to kill him before it is ... Written by Anonymous

Plot Summary | Plot Synopsis

Taglines:

To kill the unkillable, one step at a time.

Genres:

Comedy | Horror

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Details

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Also Known As:

Крепкий орешек: Дракула  »

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Did You Know?

Quotes

Dracula: "Try it sometime. Just put your lips together and suck."
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Connections

Spoofs To Have and Have Not (1944) See more »

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User Reviews

 
This movie sucks...an unoriginal and unfunny pun to go with a corresponding movie.
19 May 2009 | by (Long Beach, California) – See all my reviews

Wow! This is like the opposite of good cinema. The camera-work looks just awful, the acting is some of the worst ever seen on screen, and the script is full of clichéd lines, bad puns and characters who don't deserve to be alive. This is quite probably the worst vampire movie ever made!

The film starts off with a weird history of vampires which felt like a bad History channel special. Then we move to the plot that Steven, a teenage boy, has just lost his girlfriend in a jet ski accident, so he travels to Rome for some odd reason. He ends up meeting up with Dr. Van Helsing to kill Dracula who has been sucking the local girls' blood. This is a very flat movie, but it may seem 4-D because it will suck the life right out of you.

Dracula is a bizarre character here. He is played by many different actors. He ranges from normal looking, to looking like a lion or something, to being morbidly obese. And he will change scene by scene. Maybe this was explained somewhere in the movie, but I've now watched this a miserable three times, and not caught it once. To go with Dracula's changing appearance, someone other than the actors provide his voice, and he sounds horrible. Dracula sounds like a bad video game character, only much worse recorded.

The special effects...oh goodness are they special. They include the superimposing of a coffin to a castle overhead shot to appear as the coffin is floating. And in one great scene Dracula throws burning balls at the main characters, which is another spectacular effect. Industrial Lights and Magic should learn something from this masterpiece.

The acting...AUGH!!! Just because a movie is low budget doesn't mean they have to get bad actors, but this was the worst. It's like the director intentionally picked people who couldn't act. There was not a decent acting job in the entire movie, which is somewhat comedic, but also intolerable after a while.

This is a horrible movie. The worst vampire flick. Never will a movie be this bad again, unless a sequel is produced, written and directed by Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg.

My rating: BOMB out of ****. 90 mins. Not rated


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