P.U.N.K.S. (1999)

User Rating:

4.0/10   

Director:

Sean McNamara

Writers (WGA):

Mark Cramer (story) &
Sean McNamara (story) ...

Genre:

Comedy | Sci-Fi

Plot:

A group of misfit teens evade a corrupt scientist when they steal and attempt to return a suit that delivers supernatural strength to its wearer.

Plot Keywords:

Beautiful Woman | Independent Film

Cast

Tim Redwine	...	Drew Utley
Randy Quaid	...	Pat Utley
Cathy Moriarty	...	Mrs. Utley
Jessica Alba	...	Samantha Swoboda
Brandon Baker	...	Jonny Pasiotopolis
Kenneth Brown	...	Miles Kitchen
Patrick Renna	...	Lanny Nygren
Louan Gideon	...	Ms. Grimes
Roger Clinton	...	Carlson
Henry Winkler	...	Edward Crow
Megan Blake	...	FBI Agent Houlihan
Kim Morgan Greene	...	Woman in Bar
Gregory Mortensen	...	Bartender
rest of cast listed alphabetically:
Bruce Paul Barbour	...	Crow's Goon
Kenneth A. Brown	...	Miles Kitchen
Matthew Butcher	...	Detective #2
Danny Cistone	...	Ronny
Norm Compton	...	Crow's Goon
Sarah Dalton	...	Technician #4
Tom Dugan	...	Arms Dealer
Mike Elliott	...	Security Guard
John Escobar	...	Agent #2
Dawn Ferry	...	Crow's Secretary
Mark Ginther	...	Crow's Goon
Rodger Halston	...	Agent #1
Steve Ireland	...	King Putt
Jim Meskimen	...	Detective #1
John Nielsen	...	Lobby Security Guard (unconfirmed)
Brendan O'Brien	...	Repo Supervisor
Pee Wee Piemonte	...	Crow's Goon
Stuart Quan	...	Technician #2
Matt Riley	...	Martin Spengler
Al Sapienza	...	Flutie
Scott Schwartz	...	Convict
Scott L. Schwartz	...	Convict
Rick Simon	...	Jock #2
Suanne Spoke	...	Bruno's Woman
Bart Sumner	...	Lanny's Dad
David Theriault	...	Technician #3
Torsten Voges	...	Bruno

Also Known As:

Rebels

MPAA:

Rated PG for action/violence, mischief and mild language.

Runtime:

115 min

Country:

USA

Language:

English

Color:

Color

Certification:

USA:PG

Filming Locations:

Burbank, California, USA

Company:

Goldbar Entertainment

Trivia:

The last name of Jessica Alba's character, "Swoboda", means "freedom" in Russian

Quotes:

Samantha Swoboda: [puting her arms around 2 of the boys shoulders and leaning over them to speak] He's afraid of the G.I.R.L.

Movie Connections:

References The Rock (1996)

A Pro-Steroids Film for the Whole Family

Despite being made sometime in the late 1990's, P.U.N.K.S. looks and feels at least ten years older (a curious music video montage featuring the kids in "Risky Business" Ray Bans causing mayhem on a miniature golf course is straight out of the '80s; a curiouser ZZ Top tribute was likely lost on P.U.N.K.S.'s intended audience). The cinematography is muddy and the sound is washed-out, giving it that undesirable Saturday afternoon UPN quality. In one scene it's painfully obvious that the filmmakers couldn't afford the rights to the Katrina and the Waves song "Walking on Sunshine," so they cobbled their own variation together instead.

Typically, kids movies are allowed to get away with more because, hey, kids are stupid! This film is no exception. The adult characters (both good guys and bad) are all buffoons, a chain of various impossibilities move the plot along, and the laws of physics need not apply.

But most troubling of all is the film's underlying message: the electronic muscular enhancer device that the kids steal and utilize is, for all intents and purposes, a steroid. However, the morality of using using such a device (to defeat various antagonists) is never questioned in any way, making it a sort of pro-performance-enhancing drugs movie. How odd.

And before I lose this thought: The idea of using stun guns repeatedly on adults for laughs is pretty disturbing.

Hebephiles will enjoy seeing a young Jessica Alba in various outfits. But even I--I mean, they will be bored by the majority of this overlong film, which should have ended twenty minutes before it actually does.

This would have benefited from a DVD commentary track of some sort wherein the makers explained their intentions--or freely and unashamedly admitted that this was just "product." Perhaps such commentary could have been provided by a gaffer or a key grip.