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The tough and cold mercenary Warchild, is working for the man who took care of his war training and upbringing, the greedy General Ruechang. Ruechang is planning to take over the country by... See full summary »
When a terrorist group steals the US President's personal communications computer for launching the US arsenal in case of war, only a heroic Major has the key to prevent a Presidential assassination or a nuclear holocaust.
Waxman is a former Special Forces soldier who is now working as a heavily armed assassin for a top secret government agency. When a covert mission goes terribly wrong, Waxman and fellow assassin Clegg become that agency's prime targets.
Spetnaz (Special Ops) veteran Nick Cherenko leaves Russia after his son and wife are killed in a gunfight by drug lord Aleksandr 'Sasha' Popov's mob men. He's threatened with exposure as ... See full summary »
A mysterious stranger rolls into town on a unique motorcycle. All he carries is the bible and a desire for justice. Past vengeance collides as Ryder rights an injustice from his past and liberates the small town from a malicious oppressor.
After saving Casey, a daughter of his friend, from hired assassins, Jack Devlin is hit with a strange phobia - fear of white color. But when his other friend, who works as a bodyguard for a supermodel, is wounded, Jack decides to step in for him. Now he must confront his fear and the assassin, who seems to be well aware of Jack's problem Written by
Boris Shafir <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Stinks like a dead dog, but hey! It made me laugh.
I can only assume that this is the work of a completely different John Woo, i.e. some vodka-sodden squinting tramp by the same name who managed to get caught up in some kind of top-quality mistaken identity farce. If not, then Dolph Lundgren may as well throw himself out of a top floor window right now, because if not even John Woo can make you look cool, you don't stand a chance.
In fact, what's the exact opposite of 'cool'? That's the only way to describe this film. I saw it on TV, and I'd still have felt cheated if I hadn't been laughing so much. How my sides ached at the sight of Dolph Lundgren sitting in a big lake of milk, trying to look all serious and pained as another meaningless flashback kicked in to further the cause of the most hilariously stupid cinematic premise in the history of everything in the world ever. "Oh yes, I've got this phobia of white things, but only sometimes when the bullets stop flying and we need to stop the audience from changing channels." And even that doesn't work.
He looks old, as well. If they're going to do (snigger) Masters of the Universe II, they'd better (snort) hurry up and get on with it...
Ah, me. The only advice I can give you is this: if you don't start laughing within the first ten minutes of Blackjack, give it up.
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