4.5/10
1,719
116 user 27 critic

Modern Vampires (1998)

A borderline fascistic Dr. Van Helsing unwittingly hires crack smoking gang-bangers to pursue the decadent vampires who secretly control Hollywood and the United States.

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3 nominations. See more awards »

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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
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Panthia (as Natasha Andreichenko)
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Concierge (as Boris Krutonog)
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Hans (as Marco Hosschneider)
Stephen Porter ...
Ellia Thompson ...
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Storyline

Count Dracula is in L.A., running a hideous club scene, and he's angry that a rogue vampire, posing as a streetwalker, is slashing. He's also unhappy that Dallas, a youthful undead and former protégé, is in town. The rogue slasher, Nico, serendipitously picks Dallas as a victim; after discovering each other's nature, they become lovers. In fear of the Count, Dallas's coterie urges him to kill Nico, but he refuses. Meanwhile, a Viennese vampire hunter, Van Helsing, arrives in L.A. and hires the Crips to help him. They're soon following Nico and Dallas. When they capture her, Dallas wants to deal: spare Nico and he'll lead the hunters to Dracula. It's time for stake and bake. Written by <jhailey@hotmail.com>

Plot Summary | Plot Synopsis

Taglines:

Taste the evil. Taste the fun. See more »

Genres:

Comedy | Horror | Romance

Motion Picture Rating (MPAA)

Rated R for vampire violence and gore, sexuality, language and some drug use | See all certifications »

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Details

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Release Date:

7 May 1999 (Spain)  »

Also Known As:

The Revenant  »

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Box Office

Budget:

$2,000,000 (estimated)
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Company Credits

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Technical Specs

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Did You Know?

Trivia

Rod Steiger was director Richard Elfman's first and only choice to play Van Helsing. See more »

Goofs

When they pull up in front of the club to celebrate Dallas's return to LA, the license plate on the car is for Florida. See more »

Quotes

Nico: I never knew vampires could do sex.
Dallas: That's a myth. With a good commercial lubricant we could go for hours.
See more »

Connections

References Freeway (1996) See more »

Soundtracks

Blood Bath
By Ira Dorsey, Raheem Petterson and Steve Pitts
Performed by The Dayton Family
Published by Dope Dayton Ave./Bootleg Publishing/Pitts Publishing (BMI)
Administered by Poor Man Publishing (BMI)
Courtesy of Relativity Records
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Frequently Asked Questions

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User Reviews

Rod Steiger makes this movie good! Vampires that act like real people!
16 May 2001 | by (Oakland, CA USA) – See all my reviews

Rod Steiger is a great actor and he makes this movie good. The funniest scenes in the movie involve Steiger and the man he hires to help hunt vampires. Steiger puts everything into his role as Doctor Frederick Van Helsing the vampire slayer. His German accent is right on. Van Helsing takes out an ad in the paper to find an assistant. When a street thug applies for the job, the really funny stuff starts. Later when he needs more help he Van Helsing uses his thug assistant's street gang! How these two cultures play off of each other is the funniest part of the movie.

The vampires in this movie aren't looked upon like mindless brutes who just go around killing people. Well, they kill people but they have a "human" side to them as well. Casper Van Dien plays Dallas, a young WW2 veteran who was "turned" back in the 40s. For a vampire, Dallas is a pretty nice guy. His love interest is a young girl who was turned into a vampire when she was in her late teens or early twenties. She does something in this film that you never see a vampire do in a movie, go back and visit her family who thought she was long dead since she had been missing for years. The confrontation with her parents makes for a good scene and it is something fresh in a vampire movie.

The story moves along well and the ending has some interesting twists. There is a lot of gore in this film but it's not the worst I've seen. It's not as gory as say Saving Private Ryan. While sort of predictable there are some very surprising and funny things at the end of this movie. Rent this movie if you like camp and very funny humor.

Rayvyn


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