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Alan Furnace is a young man with the perfectly proper, quiet life of a London school teacher. But beneath all of that decency lies a burning desire for excitement and he just found it. She's a woman unlike any other: Unruly Irish eyes, Latin lips... her name is Beatrice, but on the streets they call her B. Monkey. She's about to take him on an outrageous, dangerous and sexy ride through the wild side of London. Written by
YOU'RE THE FIRST, THE LAST, MY EVERYTHING
Composed by Barry White, Tony Sepe and Sterling Radcliffe
Performed by Barry White
SA-Vette Music/My Baby-S Music Co.
Used by kind permission of Warner/Chappell Music Ltd.
Courtesy of Mercury Records Limited (London)
Licensed by kind permission from Polygram Film & TV Licensing See more »
On paper this looks like a good movie with Michael Radford directing an adaptation of an Andrew Davies novel but before the opening titles have even finished you find out what the fault of the movie is: Supply teacher Alan works at a hospital as the inhouse DJ and before you've even had time to digest this the action jump cuts to Beatrice and co carrying out a robbery , this is so much a shock in terms of juxtaposition it's like the channel has suddenly jumped to another station and you're watching another movie . Not only that but Beatrice's expositional voice over seems stilted and faintly ridiculous not helped by the fact that Asia Argento seems to have a problem saying the " F " word convincingly . Indeed none of the actors in this production seems to be able to swear with any conviction . Considering nearly every sentence contains expletives this is a serious problem with the movie
But the dialogue is not the only serious problem ,there's serious signs of under development with the script . Check the scene where Beatrice and Alan meet for the first time . I guess it might have worked okay on paper but watching the scene on celluloid makes the whole scenario unlikely . And there's other scenes like this , for example Beatrice and her colleague turn up at the house of a parent who has made a complaint about Alan . No doubt Alan knows where the parent lives but there's no hint that Alan has passed this information to Beatrice so how would she know where to find the parent ? In a film where the audience are asking themselves where this bizarre and muddled plot is heading plot holes like this jump out of the screen and strangle the critical viewer
Radford directs well but he's the wrong choice since B MONKEY seems to be attempting to be a chic British thriller with some black comedy thrown in , but the actors play their roles in a loud European way which contrasts with the British locations and language . One can't help feeling this movie would have worked far better if Davies novel had been transported to Paris or Rome with Radford employing a native cast speaking their own language . As it is B MONKEY is yet another messy Brit flick with a totally ill thought out script
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