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The Man Who Knew Too Little (1997) Poster

Quotes

Lorelei 'Lori': Are you going to bring me that martini, or do I have to suck it out of the glass from here?

Wallace: Sorry I get a little bit insensitive, but I'm a hitman!

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Wallace: [Wallace is being shot at] Time out! Time out! I got something in my eye, jagoff!

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Lorelei 'Lori': What are you? C.I.A., Mafia?

Wallace: Both.

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Wallace: Blockbuster... Des Moines.

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Wallace: Please don't call me by my real name, it destroys the reality I'm trying to create.

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Hawkins: Spencer, did you flush?

Wallace: I think she's gonna do that, don't you, pal? I'll ask her. Lori!

Hawkins: [Quietly to Daggenhurst] He's talking to her!

Sir Roger Daggenhurst: She's still in the bowl?

Hawkins: Maybe he tried to flush her, but she floated back up!

Sir Roger Daggenhurst: Tell him to flush her! Spencer knows how to deal with floaters.

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Wallace: Stay away from that phone!

[shoots phone]

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Sir Roger Daggenhurst: What are you doing with one of our communicators, Cochran?

Chief Insp. Cockburn: This man refused to provide me with any identification.

Sir Roger Daggenhurst: Of course he didn't provide you with any identification. He's a secret agent.

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Wallace: [a constable asks Wallace to see his license after a high speed chase] No, you may not! But I do have this nifty communicator with which you can speak directly to my superiors.

Wallace: [On the communicator/cigarette case] Breaker, breaker, come on back to that big ol' HQ, come on back to me.

Sir Roger Daggenhurst: Who is this?

Wallace: This is Spencer.

Sir Roger Daggenhurst: So you're still using that name, are you?

Wallace: Well, I figured I would until 11:30.

Sir Roger Daggenhurst: [to his assistant] How he mocks us.

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Wallace: She told me about the letters.

Gilbert Embleton: Letters? What letters?

Wallace: The letters. She told me about them. I know all about the letters. How do you think I know? She told me. That's how I found out.

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Wallace: Yo matey, you just stabbed me with your pen.

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Wallace: [in a singsong voice] Gilbert's gone.

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James Ritchie: [about Wallace] I never knew someone could forgot so much without a severe blow to the head.

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Sergei: Why so gloomy? Is better than being butcher.

Boris 'The Butcher' Blavasky: I like being butcher. You know exactly who you are killing. And why.

[cocks the gun]

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Lorelei 'Lori': You know, for half a second back there I thought I saw a real human being.

Wallace: Nobody asked me to be a human being.

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Police Constable Cochrane: So what's the pay like then?

Wallace: They pay all your expenses, you're licensed to kill, but there's a down side.

Police Constable Cochrane: What's that?

Wallace: Torture.

Police Constable Cochrane: There's the women, though.

Wallace: Well, they're nice after the torture. Believe me.

Police Constable Cochrane: Not much of a car they've given you though, is it?

Wallace: Oh, it's a piece of crap! They've got an Aston Martin... had trouble with the surface-to-air missiles, so it's in the shop.

Wallace: Ah.

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James Ritchie: Am I talking to an actor now, or a human being?

Chief Insp. Cockburn: Neither sir, I'm a policeman.

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Stage Manager: Excuse me, no pass, no entry.

Boris 'The Butcher' Blavasky: I'm looking for a tall American.

Stage Manager: Aren't we all, dear, but we've got a show to put on, in case you didn't notice.

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[last lines]

Wallace: Is this working? Are you liking it?

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Wallace: Was that a tear? How do you people do it? Do you poke yourself in the eye? Or are you thinking right now "My dog is dead"?

Lorelei 'Lori': What's the matter with you? Are you enjoying this?

Wallace: Enormously! "My dog... is dead".

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Sergei: [to Daggenhurst] If we cannot trust each other, how can we bring back Cold War together?

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Wallace: [after FINALLY clearing Customs] Which door's England?

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Immigration Officer: How long will you be staying in this country, sir?

Wallace: That's a very good question.

Immigration Officer: Yes, I thought so, too.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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