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Trojan War
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Reviews & Ratings for
Trojan War More at IMDbPro »

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The First Worst Summer Movie I've seen

1/10
Author: blazesnakes9 from United States
19 October 2013

During my summer vacations over the years of seeing and reviewing movies, I was always happy and delighted to some movies that I'll always remember that particular summer vacation. Well, recently, during my summer vacation this year, I have to say that I've seen my first worst movie during the summer. And, it was not the last one I thought was terrible. In August of this year, I've seen another horrible movie. That movie was Harlem Nights, with Eddie Murphy and Richard Pryor. At the end of my summer vacation, I had to ask myself one question: What movie would I not want to see again? My answer? Trojan War. And, if you're asking what's Trojan War is about, let me tell you what exactly Trojan War means in this movie. A high-school senior, played by Will Friedle, wants to woo the girl of his dreams. The girl in his dreams is a beautiful blonde, who's also friends with a high-school jerk. One night, he sees his chance to make out with her. One problem stands in his way: he doesn't have protection. In other words, he doesn't have a condom. So, he goes to a convenience store and buys the condoms, all right. But, once he's outside the store, his parents' car is stolen by a group of Hispanic thugs. Movie stereotyping being seen here. Throughout this whole movie, the poor kid tries to get one condom and in the midst of the madness, he embarks on a series of misadventures. Those misadventures includes: walking into a nightclub and having to be forced to dance with a voluptuous Hispanic woman, having to take a wild ride in a city bus, driven by a insane bus driver, who doesn't like it when the riders don't pay for their ride on the bus, and we see the young man being taken hostage by the same Hispanic thugs that took his parents' car. Now that I explain to you what's the movie about, you can see that the title of this movie is misleading. People might think this movie is about the legendary story of the Trojan War that was fought in the B.C. era. Wrong. To me, this story is ridiculous. Why do we care about this young kid, who want to love this blonde? The only thing I have to say before I forget again is the supporting character, played Jennifer Love Hewitt. What is she doing in a movie like this? She's a young actress, who has the talent to express to the audience. Here, her character goes nowhere fast. The movie is also predictable and the elements of this story are burrowed from other teenage romances. We have the kid who's in love with the blonde in the movie. He should love the brunette. I mean, if I was this kid, I would've went with Jennifer Love Hewitt. I'm again ready to forget this movie once again. But, just because I've seen my first and worst summer movie, I didn't miss out other good or great movies as well. If I had to pick the worst summer movie of 2013, Trojan War would be my choice. I would leave this one in the heat for good. ★ 1/2 1 1/2 star.

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0 out of 1 people found the following review useful:

More Of The Same... no, really!

2/10
Author: JJ McBlaze from Nijmegen, Netherlands
25 September 2009

Hey, Like some of the other reviews say, the movie is fully based in the '80's style of comedy. And that about wraps it up. It's one big cliché. Jennifer Love-Hewitt makes it all worthwhile.

I am wondering, though. Why is it that a good actress like JLH always ends up in cheap rip-offs??? Trojan War, I Know What You Did Last Summer... the list goes on and on. And now, after we've had Charmed and stuff like that we get Ghost Whisperer... I rest my case.

I do really hope to see her in an authentic role that will define her character and strengths because, and we can all agree, I think, she most definitely has 'em. Maybe... just maybe... we can persuade some people in reviving Party of Five?

Latez

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2 out of 3 people found the following review useful:

Entertaining for what it is ! A nightmare? I don't think so.

7/10
Author: insomniac_rod from Noctropolis
13 December 2008

Oh this was one of my favorite guilty pleasures! I've never been a huge fan of teen sexy comedies like this one, but I have to admit that it totally got my attention when it first came out.

Sure, the situations are very similar if not identical to many Hughes' classics from the 80's but you can't help but feel the late 90's vibe. I mean, the music, the clothing, the vibe.

The lack of the condom in the most important scene is displayed as a problem but be honest guys, who wouldn't like to be in the exact same situation?! Be honest!

Also, the movie displays a battle of morality but it's something I wish would've happened to me back in the time. I mean, having a super sexy but shy love interest, plus having the chance to bang the hottest sexy slut of high school...

Enjoy and remember your funny moments at high school. Don't watch this one otherwise you were a 90's pubert.

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3 out of 5 people found the following review useful:

Strictly For JLH Fans

3/10
Author: aimless-46 from Kentucky
14 May 2007

The Trojan War (1997) starts with a pretty good premise, even if it was stolen wholesale from 1987's "Some Kind of Wonderful". Semi-geek virgin, desperately in love with the schools unattainable beauty who has become disillusioned with popular guy she has been dating. Protagonist's gorgeous (anywhere but in this school) tomboyish best friend is secretly in love with him? Cut to climatic party scene at which all this is sorted out.

Unfortunately they stole only the premise and not the actual script (or the cast with the exception of Marley Shelton who makes a fine "dream girl" replacement for Hewitt), so the production falls far short of its predecessor. It also falls far short of its 1998 successor "Can't Hardly Wait", also featuring Jennifer Love Hewitt-this time as the unattainable beauty. In fact the writers of that film appear to have taken the script from "The Trojan War" and re- written it for an audience with IQ's about 30 points higher. So my advice (unless you are a mega JLH fan) would be to stick with the predecessor and the successor and leave "The Trojan War" for its intended audience of wiggers and drones. The soundtrack is much better in those two films as well.

"The Trojan War" was pulled from its scheduled 1997 theatrical release because of poor projected audience numbers and filed away in the hope that Jennifer Love Hewitt's skyrocketing popularity (insert "Can't Hardly Wait", "Party of Five", and "I Know What You Did Last Summer" here) would change the equation and justify the promotional expense of releasing the movie. Even that was not enough for distributors to take a chance on the film and after a year of deliberation it went direct to video. And even with Hewitt's continued success in "Ghost Whisperer", the sales projections for a DVD release of "The Trojan War" has not excited anyone in the industry.

Then again, what do I know? I'm only a child.

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0 out of 1 people found the following review useful:

Lots of Fun & Enjoyment

5/10
Author: whpratt1 from United States
26 March 2006

A friend of mine told me not to see this film because it was going to be boring about the Trojan War and the story about the Trojan Horse. Good thing I paid no attention, he probably never heard of a Trojan Condom and it is a wonder he knew what they were used for. Anyway, this was a very entertaining film with lots of laughs and good acting by the entire cast. Jennifer Love Hewitt,(Leah Jones),"Garfield",'04 was very beautiful and did everything possible to get the attention of Brad Kimble,(Will Friedle),"Less Than Perfect",'04. Brad grew up with Leah and liked her very much, but his big dream was to score with Brooke Kingsley,(Marley Shelton),"Sin City",'05. Brooke was a chick that had everything in the right places and was very hot to trot in the fast lane for guys. Well to make a long story short, Brad Kimble went entirely crazy thinking about Brooke and a single CONDOM. Enjoy

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2 out of 3 people found the following review useful:

Why Trojan War?

10/10
Author: arabelamargean from Romania
2 January 2006

.....Let's forget about Will Friedle or Jennifer Love Hewitt...There are 2 teenagers,a girl and a boy,best friends 'since like sperm',one in love with the other,the other in love with someone else...It's about the everyday struggle of an ordinary teenager who falls in love with only the most beautiful girl in the school and who now has the chance to live his dream ignoring his best friend's suggestions.Brad(Will Friedle) is a dreamer punched in the face by reality,but in a comic way,in an attempt to make him choose the smartest way.But will Rational take the same road as Love?What will he choose?

If you are a teenager or looking for a comedy with teenagers,choose this classic genre for it's actors,for it's brilliant comic situations and well planned plot,choose it to laugh your way back to those early days of your adolescence when all you worried about was how to express your love without being disappointed and mocked at...

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7 out of 13 people found the following review useful:

Enjoyable teen flick- not for teens only

8/10
Author: Petri Pelkonen (petri_pelkonen@hotmail.com) from Finland
10 December 2004

Will Friedle plays Brad Kimble who is dreaming of Brooke Kingsley (Marley Shelton).His best friend Leah Jones (Jennifer Love Hewitt) is dreaming of Brad.Brad's dream is coming true when he finds himself from Brooke's flat.But he runs into a problem when he realizes he doesn't have a condom.So off he goes to buy one.But that's not the only problem he runs into.So will Brad's dream come true? Or will Leah's dream come true? Trojan War (1997) is a great teen movie with terrific actors.Will Friedle is amazing in the lead.He's blessed with comedic skills.That you could notice in this great teen show called Boy Meets World (1993-2000), where he played Eric Matthews.Jennifer Love Hewitt is both beautiful and talented gal, who has been in many things, including "Party of Five" (1994-2000), where Jen played Sarah Reeves.There's also Danny Masterson from That 70's Show playing Seth and Will Friedle's real life best friend Jason Marsden as Josh.Lee Majors as Officer Austin and Anthony Michael Hall as Bus Driver are also pretty darn great in their roles. This movie isn't the most usual teen movie, even though the plot may sound like it.The word kafka-esque is mentioned in the plot keywords, which describes the movie pretty well.The journey Brad goes through is pretty surrealistic, like in a bad dream.That's what makes this movie pretty interesting.This movie can be enjoyed not only by teens, but also those who feel like ones, like me.I turn 23 today and I liked this movie pretty much, probably more than I should admit.So why don't you give it a shot.

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1 out of 3 people found the following review useful:

Short, but not nasty or brutish.

Author: Victor Field from London, England
8 August 2004

"Trojan War" plays more like a teen movie from the '80s than something like "Road Trip" or "American Pie" - it's got a simple premise of a boy wanting a condom to have sex with the girl of his dreams, and turns it into comic gold. Well, no it doesn't... but it's not the worst of its kind, either.

It has to be said that it's a bit on the stupid side; the script piles on the complications like there's no tomorrow, from lusty Latinas to the most harmless gang of black street toughs in history - and when our hero (Will Friedle, still then on "Boy Meets World") breaks into school to get the prized condom, it's never clear why he just doesn't go back out the window... other than that it would make an already short movie even shorter.

The movie's all frenzied - complete with cops led by Lee Majors (whose character, hopefully by design, is called Austin) in pursuit - but less funny than it could be, but it gets by through its cast, with special thanks to Anthony Michael Hall (fun as a demented bus driver who REALLY hates passengers without exact change). Marley Shelton is called on to be the eye candy and does so easily, Danny Masterson isn't Hyde here (a compliment) and let's face it, no movie with Jennifer Love Hewitt in it is entirely unwatchable. (She and Shelton are set up as direct opposites, but the latter's character isn't as unappealing as her type usually is, and the former ensures that the ending is understandable, if not exactly unpredictable.)

All in all, in the realm of Jennifer Love Hewitt movies that go straight to video in the UK, this is considerably better than "The Suburbans" and "Can't Hardly Wait." (Though probably not "House Arrest.")

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2 out of 3 people found the following review useful:

Fun and quite enjoyable!

10/10
Author: smojlh1
22 February 2004

I find this movie to be fun. It wasn't the best movie ever, but it was fun, and quite enjoyable. I had some great laughs! Love Hewitt was great in it(As always). And I liked the plot, it was cute and funny. This movie is definally not a waste of time. I would recommand it to anyone. I give it a 8 out of 10. I also loved the songs in this movie, I just recently found out the name of two of the songs that are played most. The one that plays right at the begining of the movie is called "Ill fall With Your Knife" by Peter Murphy. And the one that plays when Brad is in the bathroom with Brooke is called "The Word Behing Words" by Jeremy Toback. I love these song. In conclusion, don't miss out on this cute movie.

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1 out of 2 people found the following review useful:

Bad, bad, bad.

Author: Zuhalter from USA
11 February 2004

Now, I decided to watch this movie for two reasons...and both of them belonged to Jennifer Love Hewitt, if you catch my meaning. But really, this was a bad movie. The script was tedious, unimaginative, and laughably predictable. Don't get me wrong; I know that this was wrote as a "fluff" piece to be shot on a tiny budget. The problem was, that there are movies that make the "fluff" funny and interesting...like "Can't Hardly Wait." "Trojan War" was never funny, and there wasn't a single interesting character (or relationship) in the entire awful movie. Additionally, most of the actors seemed to take a page from the Bette Midler school of WAY OVER-ACTING COMEDY, which makes for a lot of joke-flop cringing. The directing, writing, and acting all combine for what is a unappealing, 84 minute long utter waste of time. Avoid this movie if you're not 13, or drunk enough to have trouble focusing your eyesight on the television monitor.

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