- Eddie Haskell Jr.: You looked as though you just walked out the runway.
- June Cleaver: Eddie?
- Eddie Haskell Jr.: Yes Mrs. Cleaver?
- June Cleaver: Cut the crap.
- Gilbert Bates: Yo, I'm Gilbert. This summer, my parents shipped me off to camp. I caught impetigo. And when I got back, my dad had moved out. Only since then he moved back, but he's still sleepin' in my room and he's sleeping on the couch.
- Judy Hensler: All right. Sit down and shut up! You're gonna learn this stuff if I have to shove it down your throat! And just where do you think you're going... Beaver Cleaver?
- Beaver Cleaver: Thanks anyway, Judy. But I'd rather go through 3rd grade a hundred times than listen to your ugly voice for one minute!
- Judy Hensler: Wow, Beaver. You really pulled up your grade. You got a "C."
- Beaver Cleaver: Really?
- Judy Hensler: Yeah! A "See me after class".
- Miss Landers: I am very pleased with the results of the astronomy test. Although, there's still some confusion about Pluto. While its planetary classification is still uncertain, it is definitely not Mickey's dog.
- Larry Mondello: Rats!