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Cats Don't Dance (1997) Poster

Quotes

Reporter: Gee whiz, Mr. Mammoth, what's the secret of your success?

L.B. Mammoth: Simple! It's Dimple!

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T.W.: [frantically searching through fortunes] They can break your cookie, but... you'll always have your fortune.

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Woolie Mammoth: Did you know the peanut is not a nut at all? And not a pea, for that matter. It's rather odd that we call it a nut because it isn't a nut, you see. It's actually a member of the legume family. How about pea-legume? No, that doesn't make any sense, either. But whatever it is, it makes a splendid tea.

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Darla Dimple: [in movie] Yea, as you walk through your valley of despair, fear not. For I am your little Ark Angel, and I will look after each and every little, teensy-weensy, itsy-bitsy one of you!

[crowd "awww"s]

Cranston: Shoot me.

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Tillie Hippo: Well, there's always Broadway. Yeah, Broadway. I hear hippos are very, very big on Broadway.

Frances: They're big everywhere, Darling.

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Danny: If we all work together, we can make our dreams come true. Let's show the world what we can do.

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Max: [clenching Danny in his grip] How does the kitty cat go?

Danny: Meow?

Max: Very Gooood.

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Sawyer: Look, tiger. This town has rules. Around here cats say, "Meow."

Danny: But that's so old hat. I'm sure no one would mind if I jazzed this up a bit.

Sawyer: Okay, learn it the hard way.

Danny: [dramiatic reading] Meow!

[as Gabby Hayes]

Danny: Meow! Dagnabit, meow!

[as Edward G. Robinson]

Danny: Meow, see? Yeah, that's it. Meow! Meow!

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T.W.: There's no use trying. Last night my fortune cookie said, "Give it up - you loser!"

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Darla Dimple: [singing] I've seen 'em come and I've seen 'em go / There's one thing that I know / You gotta give the people what they want / Or you'll wind up back in Kokomo, Nebraska.

Danny: Uh, Indiana, Ms. Dimple.

Darla Dimple: ...Whatever.

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Danny: Looks like we'll be the only two cats on the ark. Isn't that great?

Sawyer: So much for preserving the species!

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[Sawyer enters, wet and disheveled]

Tillie Hippo: Sawyer, what happened to you?

T.W.: Did you walk under a ladder? Smash a mirror?

Cranston: Have you looked in one lately?

Sawyer: No, a cat crossed my path.

Tillie Hippo: Really? Orange tabby?

Sawyer: Yes.

Tillie Hippo: Green vest?

Sawyer: Uh huh.

Tillie Hippo: Straw hat?

Sawyer: Yes.

Tillie Hippo: Oh, what a coinky-dink!

Sawyer: How did you know?

Tillie Hippo: Oh, hippo's intuition.

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Darla Dimple: Flannigan, the title of this picture is "Li'l Ark Angel"... ISN'T IT!

Flanigan: Yes... yes.

Darla Dimple: And who in here is an angel?

Flanigan: Mmmm... mmmm?

Darla Dimple: I SAID WHO IN HERE'S AN ANGEL?

Flanigan: Why, you are, Darla, sweetheart, celebrity, darling...

[Darla pulls on Flannigan's tie]

Flanigan: [choking] ACK... angel!

Darla Dimple: That's right! I AM an angel! I... am... an adorable... little... ANGEL!

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Danny: But I thought Hollywood was always looking for new talent.

Woolie Mammoth: Ah, ah, talented *people*, not animals.

[sighs]

Woolie Mammoth: You see, the spotlight will never be on fellows like you and me, and it's foolish to think otherwise, Danny.

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Cranston: Look who's back! I wish he had himself stuffed!

Frances: I know a divine taxidermist, darling. Did my first husband.

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Danny: What if I could get you an audition with L.B. Mammoth?

Sawyer: L.B. Mammoth? Head of Mammoth Studios?

Danny: I'm sure he'd appreciate good talent.

Cranston: After nothing but Darla, he's gotta be starving for it!

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Darla Dimple: I... hate... *animals!*

[pointing to Danny]

Darla Dimple: Especially that one!

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L.B. Mammoth: You animals will never...

Flanigan: ...nibble kibble in this town again!

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Danny: Look, if you're going to accept what they think of you, then you can leave. I almost did.

Cranston: Well, you should have. Life here for animals is the pits. We're always playing the scapegoat.

Woolie Mammoth: Quickly forgotten.

Frances: Working for scale.

Danny: Then why are you still here? Because you can't get over that feeling, can you? That feeling you get when... when you two dance together. When you play. When you sing. They cursed you, humilliated you, even slammed the door on your face, but they haven't made you forget. Have they?

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Danny: Look at you standing there with the long, long face.

Horse: [to another horse] Hey, he must be talking to you.

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Danny: I hear Farley Wink gets good parts for animals.

Frances: If you call hanging from a hook a good part.

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Danny: Wow! My own dream come true.

Farley Wink: Yeah, yeah. But remember: 10% of that dream is mine.

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Darla Dimple: They like it big, they like it loud / Maybe a little bit jazzy sometimes / Mister Pussycat, listen to me / You don't have to be good, but you had better be...

Max: Get hot, Miss Dimple.

Darla Dimple: Big and Loud! / Big and Loud! / Wanna make your mamma proud / Make it big / And / Loud!

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Pudge the Penguin: I would have slugged that big lug Max for you, but I didn't want to hurt the guy.

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Woolie Mammoth: [after Pudge lands on the piano keys] That's it! B-flat. You have a natural rear for music, little fellow.

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Sawyer: Well, well. Run of the soundstage, use of Darla's ark, costumes... I don't know. Something seems fishy.

Frances: I beg your pardon?

Sawyer: Sorry. It's just that I smell a rat.

Rat: Excuse me?

Sawyer: Oh, never mind.

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Darla Dimple: [singing] I didn't get where I am today / By getting myself get pushed around / No man nor beast / Nor kitty cat nor doggie / Is going to bring me down.

Max: Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Darla Dimple: Shut up, Max.

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Cranston: Look at them. I'm ashamed to be an animal.

Frances: Oh, shut up, you old nanny, and show old Frannie what you got.

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Tillie Hippo: Well?

Sawyer: I can't do this.

Tillie Hippo: And?

Sawyer: I can't do this.

Tillie Hippo: So?

Sawyer: I can't believe I'm doing this.

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Sawyer: Sometimes I ask myself, "Why do I put up with this?"

Frances: The glamour?

Sawyer: What, this pig sty? No offense, Harry.

Harry the Pig: None taken.

Sawyer: Unless you're talking about the glamour of filing, the romance of typing.

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Darla Dimple: Now, the people they were so bad / That the Lord made the rain come down / And He washed away the bad cities, and He washed away the bad towns / And all of the people drowned / With the animals it was different, though some of them drowned too / The others were just poor animals, and they didn't know what to do / So... I built a little ark / As cute as it can be / And I put all the animals two by two / On my little boat on the sea.

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L.B. Mammoth: Ah, the recipe for a Darla Dimple movie. Begin with one part adorable character in jeopardy.

[inside the soundstage, Darla has tied up Pudge]

Darla Dimple: Sorry, penguin, but in everyone's life, a little rain must fall. Max, man the valves!

Max: Yes, Miss Dimple.

[Max opens the water valves]

L.B. Mammoth: Add two parts plucky determination...

Darla Dimple: More water, Max. More water!

L.B. Mammoth: Sprinkle in an air of innocence...

Darla Dimple: More rain, Max! We must have rain!

L.B. Mammoth: Stir in with...

Darla Dimple: More water!

L.B. Mammoth: Add a pinch of...

Darla Dimple: Thunder!

L.B. Mammoth: And an itsy-bisty dash of...

Darla Dimple: Lighting! Ah-ha-ha-ha!

L.B. Mammoth: Mix them all together, and what do you get?

[The stage doors open, revealing a flooded stage which then spills out into the lot]

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Danny: Say, what happened back there?

Sawyer: Look, I...

Danny: Did I hit a sour note? Because if I hit a sour note, I can go back and... I can fix it.

Sawyer: Danny, they don't care! Don't you get it? What's the matter with you? Why are you so determined on making a fool of yourself?

Danny: What do you mean? All I want to do is the thing I love. Doesn't everyone?

Sawyer: It's not that simple.

Danny: It is in Kokomo.

Sawyer: Then... maybe that's where you should have stayed.

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Darla Dimple: I'm the star, you stupid, stupid cat! I should have drowned you all when I FLOODED THE STAGE!

Darla Dimple: [echoing over the PA] Flooded the stage!... flooded the stage!... flooded the stage!

Crowd: Darla Dimple! I can't believe it.

[Darla tries to act sweet, then Pudge opens a trap door under her]

Darla Dimple: [as she falls down the trap door] MAAAAAAX!

Max: [on the Darla balloon, floating over Paris] Oui, Miss Dimple?

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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