Brash NYC policeman Officer Gunther Toody is partnered with stiff, by-the-book Officer Francis Muldoon to protect an important mafia witness prior to testifying against orgainzed crime in ... See full summary »
John C. McGinley,
Three young boys, Rocky, Colt and Tum Tum together with their neighbor girl, computer whiz Amanda are visiting Mega Mountain amusement park when it is invaded by an army of ninjas led by ... See full summary »
Dr. Elena Kinder and Dr. Heap work for BABYCO, the world's leading manufacturer in baby products. What the public doesn't know, however, is that Dr. Kinder and Dr. Heap are secretly working on cracking the code to "baby talk" which is actually a highly sophisticated language which allows babies to communicate the knowledge of the secrets of the universe with which they are born. Problems arise when Sly, the smartest of the babies, escapes from the lab and unites the babies of the outside world to help free the babies trapped in the lab. Kinder and Heap must find Sly before it is too late. Written by
The combination for Sly's alarm system at the beginning of the film is "1673." See more »
Sly declares his "disguise sucks" and discards the hat, coat, scarf and cigar, then climbs into the baby carriage. Later, when he leaves the carriage, the baby girl has his cigar and scarf. See more »
[points finger at sly and interrupts]
Sly, make him pick his nose!
yeah come on sly - make him pick it!
[other babies start agreeing]
no that's gross.
[babies start cheering sly to do it]
All right - -pick your nose now!
[other babies shout "pick it... pick it" then laugh hysterically as lennie picks his nose]
[then dickie still hypnotized in the other room starts picking his nose as well unseen by sly and the other babies]
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Some people think they have experienced pain. They think their twisted ankle, broken jaw, urinary infection, or whatever petty affliction they're suffering from, is what pain really means. How I admire these misguided, blissfully ignorant fools.
I can tell you without the slightest doubt that I'd rather have twelve urinary infections, both my legs broken and my nasal cavities filled with sharp, rusty needles that swung up and down every time I breathed, than watch the almost obscenely idiotic mess known as "Baby Geniuses" again. Ever had one of those days when you woke up to find that you had the bad hair day of the century, were late for an extremely important job interview, accidentally flashed the landlord and was evicted, and got dumped by your girlfriend? Watching "Baby Geniuses" is like that day - on drugs.
Does anyone with a three digit IQ actually find talking babies funny? I just think it's disturbing! I don't need to see some dude who has barely learned how to walk cracking pop culture jokes or repeating the term "diaper gravy" over and over again. Yeah, really great joke guys, gets better every time I hear it. I think "diaper gravy" #451 was my favourite. Baby Sly told it with such passion and intensity, I got chills.
I swear, some day those poor baby "actors" will find out that their parents let them be cast in this torture device, track them down, put them in a nursing home and never speak to them again! So not only will "Baby Geniuses" by default ruin your evening, it may also have ruined many people's lives. Two birds, one diaper, you might say. I can only hope that the people who actually saw the SEQUEL to this crime against mankind and all that is holy were mentally stable enough to not break down completely. I swear one viewing of "Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2" would undoubtedly send me straight into some padded room somewhere in a fancy jacket. There's only so much a man can take.
If you have an acquaintance you really, really, REALLY hate, this film is the perfect Christmas present. Christopher Lloyd must have been on drugs when he signed on. One more thing - if I never see anything as revoltingly disturbing as that giant baby robot again, I will die happy. Avoid.
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