MOVIEmeter
SEE RANK
Down 2,102 this week

Dinosaur Valley Girls (1996)

3.1
Your rating:
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 -/10 X  
Ratings: 3.1/10 from 129 users  
Reviews: 4 user | 5 critic

Haunted by recurring dreams of Hea-Thor (Denise Ames), a gorgeous cavegirl,and a menacing Allosaurus, action-movie star Tony Markham (Jeff Rector) soon finds himself transported, by means ... See full summary »

Director:

Writer:

0Check in
0Share...

Watch Now

From $2.99 on Amazon Instant Video

User Lists

Related lists from IMDb users

Own
a list of 322 titles
created 15 Jul 2012
 
a list of 230 titles
created 04 May 2013
 
a list of 210 titles
created 29 Jun 2013
 
list image
a list of 146 titles
created 8 months ago
 
a list of 647 titles
created 5 months ago
 

Related Items


Connect with IMDb


Share this Rating

Title: Dinosaur Valley Girls (1996)

Dinosaur Valley Girls (1996) on IMDb 3.1/10

Want to share IMDb's rating on your own site? Use the HTML below.

Take The Quiz!

Test your knowledge of Dinosaur Valley Girls.

Photos

Learn more

People who liked this also liked... 

Horror
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5.5/10 X  
Director: Donald F. Glut
Stars: Yuu Asakura, Joe Baisur, Bruce Barlow
Horror
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5.5/10 X  

The vampire Mamuwalde (Blacula) is stirred by African voodoo, and is forced to kill again.

Director: Bob Kelljan
Stars: William Marshall, Don Mitchell, Pam Grier
Comedy | Sci-Fi
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 2.6/10 X  
Director: William Hellfire
Stars: Erin Brown, Tina Krause, Ruby Larocca
Crime | Drama | Horror
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5.3/10 X  
Director: Khwaja Sarfraz
Stars: Yasmeen Shaukat, Deeba Begum, Habibur Rehman
Blood Scarab (Video 2008)
Horror
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 3/10 X  

Countess Elizabeth Bathory, history's infamous lesbian vampire who, centuries ago, bathed in the blood of virgins to preserve her youth, arrives from Transylvania to take over the Los ... See full summary »

Director: Donald F. Glut
Stars: Monique Parent, Del Howison, Brinke Stevens
Blackenstein (1973)
Horror
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 3.1/10 X  

Eddie is a Vietnam veteran who loses his arms and legs when he steps on a land mine, but a brilliant surgeon is able to attach new limbs. Unfortunately an insanely jealous assistant (who ... See full summary »

Director: William A. Levey
Stars: John Hart, Ivory Stone, Joe De Sue
Action | Adventure | Comedy
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 3.2/10 X  

An army captain is flying three misfit deserters home for a court martial when the plane has engine trouble and they must land on an uncharted island. There they find a primitive society of... See full summary »

Directors: Fred Olen Ray, Jim Wynorski
Stars: Ross Hagen, Richard Gabai, Antonia Dorian
Horror
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 4.6/10 X  
Director: Donald F. Glut
Stars: Brick Randall, William Smith, Del Howison
Action | Adventure | Horror
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5.2/10 X  

A plane crashes in the Amazon jungle, and its passengers must battle their way through cannibals, slave traders, wild animals and murderous piranha fish to safety.

Director: Michele Massimo Tarantini
Stars: Michael Sopkiw, Suzane Carvalho, Milton Rodríguez
Horror
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5/10 X  

An African-American scientist develops a formula to regenerate dying liver cells, but it has the unfortunate after-effect of turning him into an albino vampire with a mania for killing ... See full summary »

Director: William Crain
Stars: Bernie Casey, Rosalind Cash, Marie O'Henry
History
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 -/10 X  

A documentary that explores man's enduring fascination with the vampire legend by examining historical accounts, literary works, and as they are portrayed in film and television.

Stars: William Marshall
Amazons (1986)
Action | Fantasy | Adventure
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 4.6/10 X  

An epic from the dark ages about the legendary lost tribe of warrior women! The girls fly into danger, come up against fierce tribes, fall prey to sorcery, put to rest a family rivalry of ... See full summary »

Director: Alejandro Sessa
Stars: Ty Randolph, Penelope Reed, Joseph Whipp
Edit

Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
...
Tony Markham
...
Dr. Benjamin Michaels
Griffin Drew ...
Daphne Adrian
Harrison Ray ...
Sensei and Beeg-Mak
Elizabeth Landau ...
Andrey Benedict
Carrie Vanston ...
Karen Forster
Shirlee Jean Brown ...
Masseuse
Tony Clay ...
TV Anchorman
Joan Gregory ...
Paleontologist
Yvonne Green ...
Fan
Dawanda Pesicka ...
Fan
Susan Jay ...
Fan
Bobby Cabana ...
Museum Visitor
Marc Schirmeister ...
Guy with Guy in Hawaiian shirt on museum steps
J. Reynolds Shoenberger ...
Museum Visitor
Edit

Storyline

Haunted by recurring dreams of Hea-Thor (Denise Ames), a gorgeous cavegirl,and a menacing Allosaurus, action-movie star Tony Markham (Jeff Rector) soon finds himself transported, by means of a magic Icon, back through time to Dinosaur Valley. Now trapped in world of dangerous dinosaurs, grunting cavemen and a tribe of exotic, love-starved cavegirls, Tony must put his modern-days skills to extreme tests in order to survive prehistoric perils, win the cavegirl of his dreams and (maybe) return to his own time? Written by Anonymous

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis


Certificate:

Unrated | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:

 »
Edit

Details

Country:

Language:

Release Date:

8 February 2002 (Japan)  »

Company Credits

Show detailed on  »

Technical Specs

Runtime:

(director's cut)

Color:

See  »
Edit

Did You Know?

Crazy Credits

No animals, extinct or extant, were harmed in the making of this movie. Humans on the other hand... See more »

Connections

Featured in 100 Years of Horror: Dinosaurs (1996) See more »

Frequently Asked Questions

This FAQ is empty. Add the first question.

User Reviews

 
Makes "Dinosaur Island" look like a masterpiece
3 August 2014 | by (United States) – See all my reviews

After enduring Fred Olen Ray's idiotic, unfunny "Dinosaur Island" it seemed impossible to lower the bar any further. But this film is twice as bad, and boring to boot. Tony, a barely- likable Hollywood action star, is transported back to prehistoric times (what, that plot again?) via a magical icon where he cavorts with cave babes, including a token black girl, who wear leopard-spot and zebra-skin bikinis. Essentially it's 1985's dumb teen comedy "Cavegirl" multiplied by a power of ten and turned into a dumb adult comedy. Much like Ed Wood, writer/director Donald Glut has great enthusiasm for the subject ("Land of the Lost", "Dink, the Little Dinosaur") but no ideas or artistic vision worth putting on film. In fact, it's astonishing that investors actually put up the money to make this at all. Clearly, this cost someone a fortune that they probably did not get back. To its credit, the cinematography and colorful locations are quite beautiful. And the old school stop-motion dinosaurs, though a bit stiff and clunky, are actually fun to see. It's like watching Willis O'Brien's 1925 "The Lost World" in color.

The main liability is the utterly witless script fails miserably as a comedy (absolutely nothing even moderately amusing occurs) and also fails as softcore erotica -- despite frequent scenes of beautiful topless cavegirls. To kill some screen time, there's also a sudden, out-of-context music video, "Jurassic Punk", with a montage of dinosaurs and slow-motion dancing girls. That part was almost entertaining.

In order to have some sort of story (i.e. conflict), the cavemen and cavewomen live in separate, single-gender tribes. The men adore a "pinup" stick-figure drawing of a woman they call Raquel (as in former cavegirl Raquel Welch, get it?). Now that we've all had a good laugh, let's take a moment to catch our breath ... Both tribes speak a made up language so, the only verbal humor comes from Tony reciting tired old tag lines (like "Make my day") from vintage action films. (Stop it, these hilarious jokes are killing me.) One would then expect plenty of physical slapstick humor to compensate, right? Sorry, no. However, this being a sophisticated film for adults, the cavemen do fart a lot and Three Stooges-type sound effects are added in to remind us this is a comedy, damn it, despite all evidence to the contrary.

After over an hour of pointless, episodic tedium, the cavemen finally raid the cavegirls' camp and drag them off. Almost immediately, the girls realize being abducted and molested isn't so bad after all and the two tribes merge and everyone is happy. The only other plot conflict is dealing with a bothersome allosaurus.

For some reason, while wearing his screenwriter's hat, director Glut found it terribly amusing that sex is repeatedly referred to as "tooka-tooka" by the cave people. Confident of a box- office smash, the frightening end credits announce a proposed sequel entitled "Dinosaur Valley Girls: Tooka-Tooka Too!" We can all thank our lucky stars that this was never made. Glut moved on to make some equally terrible erotic-ish horror flicks.


0 of 0 people found this review helpful.  Was this review helpful to you?

Message Boards

Recent Posts
Fun Fun Fun joanimar2
Discuss Dinosaur Valley Girls (1996) on the IMDb message boards »

Contribute to This Page

Create a character page for:
?