D3: The Mighty Ducks (1996)
Goldberg: It's not enough that I get shot at on the ice, now I have to worry about getting nailed off the ice. Why am I always getting shot at?
Fulton: You're a goalie, dude. Deal.
Mrs. Madigan: Every Monday you will have a practice quiz. Every Wednesday you will have a real quiz. Every Friday you will have an exam. And any time I FEEL like it you will have a surprise quiz or exam.
Dwayne: What'd he say?
Russ: Something about a shrinking sphincter.
Connie Moreau: This ninja stuff really makes you look uh, I don't know how you say um...
Guy Germaine: [suavely] Ruggedly handsome?
Connie Moreau: Amazingly stupid!
Guy Germaine: [sarcastically] Very funny.
[In the goal singing]
Julie Gaffney: Fulton scored, Fulton scored. I am really bored. Fulton's great, Fulton's great. A year ago he couldn't even skate.
Goldberg: Great, now I have to worry about being nailed off the ice as well. Why am I always getting shot at?
Fulton: You're a goalie, dude, deal.
Goldberg: Thanks, Fulton, real sensitive.
Fulton: You're welcome.
Dwayne: Waiter I have too many forks... I only need one... Ya'll... It's just...
[Picks up lil' fork]
Dwayne: Hey, what's this lil' bitty one for?
Coach Orion: Goldberg, when's the last time you practiced?
Goldberg: Well, we don't really practice per say. We either play or... play around.
Rick: [to the ducks] You're nothin' but white trash!
Russ: [leans forward] Uh, who are you callin' white trash?
Charlie Conway: [after Cole steals Charlie's lunch] Aww. C'mon, my mommy made me brownies
Fulton: Yeah, fresh warm ones.
Rick: It's too bad about your bash brother, I heard he was too scared to leave home.
Fulton: Portman ain't scared of nothin'.
Cole: Eww, what the hell kind of brownies are these?
Charlie Conway: I gotta tell her to stop using horse turds in the recipe.
Gordon Bombay: [to priest] Excuse me, one second.
[takes Hans' jersey and lays it on the coffin, then addresses the 'Ducks']
Gordon Bombay: Every time you touch the ice, remember that it was Hans who taught us to fly.
Charlie Conway: [Gordon has set Charlie's alarm for 6AM] Go away.
Gordon Bombay: Can't do that. Come on.
[flips Charlie and his mattress over]
Gordon Bombay: Get dressed, Charlie.
Gordon Bombay: [walking down the hall with Charlie, he leads him to a trophey cabinet and motions to a picture of himself] Check this out. Look at that hair.
Gordon Bombay: I look like Greg Brady.
Gordon Bombay: I was like you, Charlie. When I played hockey, I was a total hot shot... tried to take control of every game. I wound up quitting. So I tried the law. Same thing. I ruled the courtroom, but inside I was a mess. Started drinking. Man, I was going down. But then this great thing happened, maybe the best thing ever: I got arrested and sentenced to community service. And there you were: Charlie and the Ducks. And as hard as I fought it, there you were. You gave me a life, Charlie, and I want to say thank you. I told Orien about all this when I talked to him about taking over. I told him that you were the heart of the team and that you would learn something from each other. I told him that you were the real Minnesota Miracle Man.
Charlie Conway: [astonished] You did?
Gordon Bombay: [nods] So be that man, Charlie. Be that man.
Coach Orion: [in reference to Bombay] He IS good.
Charlie Conway: Just getting started.
Russ: Hey, Biff. One more thing. After we beat you, the Warriors die and the Ducks fly.
Coach Orion: [blows whistle] Let's go! Get over here! Take a knee. You guys are not skating like Warriors. You look like something else. You look like Ducks.
Coach Orion: You're playing hard. I'm proud of you guys.
Luis Mendoza: They're cheap-shotting us to death.
Coach Orion: I know they are. I know they are.
Lester Averman: It's going to take a miracle for us to hold on.
Dean Portman: [enters the lockeroom reading his scholarship] Dean Portman is awarded a full athletic and academic scholarship to the Eden Hall Academy. I had this lying around the house in Chicago, my attorney thought I should sign, I agreed. It's official boys. I'm back!
Charlie Conway: [aside to Orien] Bombay.
Coach Orion: [picks hockey puck up off the ice and addresses the Ducks] What's the one thing all great teams have in common?
Lester Averman: Great coaching.
Coach Orion: [unamused] Don't try to suck up to me, Averman.
Coach Orion: Defense. See, unlike scoring, defense never quits. But to play great defense you need one thing above all else.
Lester Averman: [sarcastically, to Goldberg] Bet it starts with a W.
Coach Orion: Confidence. Listen, if you learn nothin' else when you're here, you learn this, all right? This is not just about hockey. It's easy to be confident when you have control of the puck. It's very, very difficult to keep that confidence when you gotta take whatever strange bounces life throws your way. Don't be careless, but don't be too careful either. You cannot be afraid to lose! That's how you gain the confidence to attack the game when the puck isn't yours. That's how you attack life... even when you think you don't have any control. And that's how you play real defense.
Ken Wu: Yo, Russ, you gotta teach me how to talk some trash.
Russ: It can't be taught, Kenny-man. I mean, it's gotta be the first thing that comes to your mind. You just gotta go for it. Try it.
Ken Wu: Hey Ref! You - ...
Russ: [covers Ken's mouth] Ah! Shh. Pick another target.
Ken Wu: [stuttering] Hey, number forty-four, you - you - you - you- you play - you don't play real good.
Bears Player: Yeah, right.
Russ: Shorter, man. Get to the point.
Ken Wu: Hey, number nine! Bite me!
[is knocked over by number nine player]
Russ: [laughs] Now we're gettin' somewhere.
Coach Orion: Hey Charlie. We've really backed into a corner here. We hold them for 2 minutes, we've got ourselves a tie.
Charlie Conway: We're up to it.
Coach Orion: I know you are. But you deserve to win. Not carless, but not to careful either. You see your shot take it.
[Puts a "C" on Charlie's jersey]
Coach Orion: Go get them Captain.
Charlie Conway: Goldberg! Gold! I knew you could do it!
Goldberg: Don't ever do that to me again!
Charlie Conway: Goldberg you scored. We win!
Gordon Bombay: [to the board] You know why I'm so good? Because I had a good education, you gave it to me. And you're going to give it to these kids.
Coach Orion: [to Charlie] He *is* good.
Charlie Conway: Just getting started.
Dean Buckley: You can learn a lot from ants. These Brazilian fire ants can teach you a lot about successful societal structure. You see, there's one queen in there, the rest are dedicated worker ants. Everybody pulls their weight nobody complains same here at Eden Hall, only you are the workers; the backbone.
Russ: And you're the queen?