Leprechaun 3 (1995 Video)
Doctor: Now listen to me! This may mean the difference between living and dying. Do you have health insurance?
Scott: Do ya take Green Cross?
Leprechaun: Now that was quite a load to have to explode. What a lovely lass, I had to blow up your ass but now I must hit the road!
Leprechaun: For pulling this trick, I'll chop off your dick!
Leprechaun: Ahhh... lovely golden palaces completely full of riches. I'll rip 'em off and rob 'em blind, those dirty sons of bitches.
Scott: There once was a lady of Totten / Whose tastes grew perverted and rotten. / She cared not for steaks / Or for pastries and cakes / But lived upon penis au gratin.
Waitress: Metallica. No, wait... White Zombie. I got the album. Enjoy your spuds!
Scott: What the hell did I just say?
Leprechaun: There was an old man of Madras / Whose balls were made of fine brass. / So in stormy weather / They both clanged together / And sparks flew out of his arse.
Leprechaun: I want my gold shilling. Tell me where it is or there will be another killing.
Doctor: All right, let's just start with every test that starts with the letter A, tomorrow we'll do the B's, and then Thursday...
Nurse: You play golf on Thursday.
Doctor: Well, this is an emergency.
Tammy: Let me go, you son of a bitch!
Leprechaun: Now that's no way to speak about me mother, bless her green soul.
Scott: [on the phone] Yeah, give me hotel security. Yeah, I'd like to report a leprechaun in your hotel. No, a LEPRECHAUN. Yeah, little green guy. HE TRIED TO KILL ME! Hello?
Scott: Have you ever blown a rod before?
Tammy: I beg your pardon?
Scott: The engine, I meant. See, you got your pistons and your rods... You don't want to know this, right?
Tammy: No, actually, I don't.
Scott: Excuse me, where can I cash a check?
Mitch: You old enough to be in here, kid?
[sees the amount of Scott's check]
Mitch: Yes, you're old enough. Right over there. If there's anything you need, just come to me.
Tony: Look sharp, be sharp.
Art: No, tell him the other thing. The threat thing.
Tony: Oh. You pay Arthur the money you owe him or I will kill you.
Mitch: What are you, tough guys? I got hemorrhoids tougher than you.
Tammy: Sorry I'm late, Fazio.
Fazio: I told you, you will address me as Great One offstage and on.
Tammy: You're a magician, not the Pope.
Art: [to Leprechaun] Tell me, what was Judy Garland really like?
Mitch: Ladies and gentlemen, due to a slight solicrivilance in the stem of the wheel, the situation is thus - this table is now closed.
Fazio: [Leprechaun has turned his white rabbit into a pile of dung] Oh, shit!
Leprechaun: A little token of my esteem. It is exactly what it seems. Made fresh daily at exactly 9:00. It comes from my shillelagh. You can keep it in a crock. Ha ha.
Art: What do I want? I want brown hair. I want health insurance for all Americans. I want the Mets to get their shit together.
Scott: I thought maybe you could sneak me inside the casino to see what it's like.
Tammy: What? Do you think this is like Disneyland or something?
Loretta: Who the hell are you?
Leprechaun: I'm a leprechaun me lass, and I'm gonna make you pay.
Loretta: What do you want?
Leprechaun: Your boobs are big. Your butt is small. But still you're in for quite a fall.
Loretta: What are you talking about?
Leprechaun: Oh, well didn't you hear? Bigger is good, but jumbo is dear. I'll give ya boobs that'll come out to here.
Fazio: You want magic? Bend over. I'll pull a rabbit out of your ass.