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Bushwhacked (1995) Poster

(1995)

Quotes

Max: Now you are going to pretend to be me.

Jack Erickson: Give yourself up boy.

Max: Gimme that glue!

Jack Erickson: You still have a chance to be a FINE YOUNG SCOUT!

Max: WHERE IS THAT GLUE?

Jack Erickson: Top pocket.

Max: Put your palms up

[spits off the top of the glue and spreads glue on the wheel]

Max: Now grab hold of the wheel.

Jack Erickson: ARE YOU NUTS?

Max: I said grab the wheel. Come on, I have a gun for Christ sake!

Jack Erickson: You're going to pay for this mister

Max: [spreads glue on top of the wheel] Now put your chin there

Jack Erickson: You know this stuff is permanent.

Max: Do it!

Jack Erickson: Ohh sh... Hey! I can't drive like this!

Max: Keep heading south and don't stop driving until you get to Mexico and I'm going to be right behind you the whole time

[removes the rear view mirror]

Max: Don't try any funny and I'll blow your butt off, got it?

Jack Erickson: Yeah I got it, keep driving, no funny stuff, blow butt off.

Max: [hesitates then answers] Right!

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Fishman: Sir, would it be ok if we called you Spider?

Max: Why the h - - would you wanna call me that?

Gordy: Because it's your nick name.

Max: Well fine then. Call me Spider!

Fishman: Spider. Spider. Spider!

Max: WHAT?

Fishman: How come your nick name's Spider?

Max: Because I once killed a kid who called me Spider, one time too many!

Fishman: Yeah, but how could he call you Spider one time too many if your nick name wasn't already Spider?

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[making smoke signals]

Fishman: Ok, it's two longs and one short. No, no, no, stop. Stop wait. Two shorts and one long.

Barnhill: Oh great! What are we supposed to do, cross that letter out?

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Max: Watcha making?

Gordy: It's a crystal-dialed receiver. You know what that is, right?

Max: Yeah, of course I do. That is a beauty.

Gordy: That's the toolbox.

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[scouts singing]

Max: Alright! Knock it off! What is that? We run and dance and sing and play?

Gordy: My mom kinda wrote the words.

Max: Well they suck! Okay?

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[Boys are peeing off of a ledge]

Max: Shake your lizards, let 'em drain. Move your hips and...

Everyone: Spell your name!

Max: Send it straight, send it hard. Now a sword fight, go...

Everyone: On guard!

Max: Eat your veggies, eat your starches. Lean back boys...

Everyone: Golden arches!

Max: Alright! Now flip them and zip them and let's get going!

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[little kid rides up on a tricycle]

Kid: Can I play too?

Scouts: AAAAHHHH!

Barnhill: Little kid, go home.

Gordy: We're not playing, we're practicing.

Kid: You guys are silly.

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[looking at a Playboy]

Ralph: Whoa! Whoa! Let me see. I bet you've never seen anything like this before, huh, Barnhill. You probably don't even know about the birds and the bees, you butthead.

Kelsey: Oh, and you do?

Ralph: Yeah. That's right, I do.

Kelsey: Oh yeah? Go ahead and explain it to us.

Ralph: Well, I... Uh, I know it's about making babies. And I know it takes a man *and* a woman to make it work right. And that they both have to go into a room. And they both take their shirts off.

Fishman: No! No, no, no. The man doesn't have to take his shirt off. Just the woman!

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Barnhill: Hey! Check it out! Len Strader's in her underwear!

Dana: Let me see!

Barnhill: Sorry. She just ducked behind McClipman's house.

Dana: Barnhill, you're such a liar.

Barnhill: You're such a shrimp.

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[Gordy's hanging from a ledge]

Max: Hey kid, how's it hanging? Alright, Gordy, I'm coming down to get you.

Gordy: No! You don't know what you're doing!

Max: Of course I do! I'm the Lizard! Remember?

Gordy: You mean the Spider?

Max: Right.

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Gordy: My mom says the guy who's taking us has hiked all over the world.

Barnhill: I'm sure he won't be half as good as the guy me and my dad had on our trip to the Serengeti.

Ralph: Barnhill, if you're dad is so friggin' cool, then why isn't he our scout leader?

Barnhill: Oh yeah. Spies have a lot of time for the scouts.

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Ralph: Nice dolls.

Barnhill: Did you bring a pretty pink umbrella too, in case it starts to rain?

Kelsey: No, I figured we could all just crouch under a pair of your underwear and wait it out.

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Fishman: Well guys, we gotta start a fire. Better start looking for pinecones.

Max: Pinecones?

Fishman: It says in the manual, whenever your camp is surrounded by green wood, always use pinecones to start your fire.

Max: If the manual told you to stick your wiener in a light-socket, would you do it?

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Ralph: We finally get to go on an overnight, and we end up at Grand Central Station.

Gordy: It's better than my backyard.

Ralph: Not by much.

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[on the phone]

Marty: Grabelski! What the hell's going on? Some guy on TV said you killed somebody!

Max: I know, but it's not true. I was set up. I gotta know if there's another package for Timberline Inc., to Reinhart Bragdon.

Marty: What the hell's Reinhart Bragdon got to do with anything?

Max: Because that's the guy I killed!

Marty: Oh, so you did kill somebody.

Max: No, I told you I was framed!

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Jack Erickson: God bless those little scouts!

Agent Palmer: What? What do you see?

Jack Erickson: Smoke signals! Right by the book.

Agent Palmer: Oh, yeah!

Jack Erickson: Well, almost.

Agent Palmer: What do they say?

Jack Erickson: Belp! Belp!

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Max: Let me tell you something, honey. There's nothing wrong with being afraid.

Fishman: Spider, I'm afraid, too.

Max: Shut up, you gutless worm! I'm talkin' to her!

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Jack Erickson: Let's get vertical.

[starts climbing]

Agent Palmer: You expect me to climb up there with just my hands?

Jack Erickson: That's right, dough boy, that's the way to do it.

Agent Palmer: How about when you get to the top you throw me down a ladder?

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Barnhill: Hey, Spider. We just pissed on some guy's head!

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Dana's father: What The Hell gave you the Right to take away Dana?

Mrs. Patterson: He had a permission slip like everyone else.

Dana's father: You don't Know the Difference between my Signature and a little 10 year olds?

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Jack Erickson: You might say I'm the thin khaki line between morality and depravity.

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Jack Erickson: That's what's wrong with this country, everybody wants it NOW.

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Max: [being stopped by a group of senior citizens walking across with mountain bikes] What is this, a parade?

[honks]

Max: Come on! Would you move your wrinkled asses? I'm in a hurry here!

[old man laughs and waves at him, mocking wave and laugh back]

Max: Ha ha, I'm gonna run you over!

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Jack Erickson: I teach my kids to hunt down the goodness in life.

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Gordy: He didn't know the difference in a beehive and a pine cone?

Kelsey: What're you getting at?

Gordy: I don't know.

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Kelsey: Oh my God, we're trapped with a murderer!

Gordy: A psycho murderer!

Fishman: I don't think they cover that in here

[the scout manual]

Fishman: .

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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