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Jake's Progress (TV Mini-Series 1995) Poster

(1995 TV Mini-Series)

Quotes

Jake Diadoni: Play wi' me, Daddy!

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Kate Eliot: Play with me now, Daddy!

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Alex Halliwell: You are Universally HATED, Grace! Loathed and despised by anyone who crosses your path. And none more so, in the end, than by me! I should have married Betty Montgomery!

[Dies of a cardiac arrest]

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Jake Diadoni: Does My Friend Flicker die at the end?

Jamie Diadoni: Jake, everybody dies at the end.

Jake Diadoni: [Hides under covers] Don't WANT to die! I want everyone else to die! Everyone else 'cept me and me Daddy!

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Julie Diadoni: I can't BE like you, Jamie! I just love you, you shitehook!

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Monica: Just before you die you'll have an affair.

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Blue Eyes: [to self] Ooh, play with me, Daddy!

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Monica: And this is your Mining Play?

Playwright: No, this is the one about Anal Penetration among Ethnic Minorities.

Monica: How deeply fascinating...

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Jamie Diadoni: Is it true? Are you as miserable as I am?

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Jamie Diadoni: If you're in trouble, if you're in doubt; the Cisco Kid will help you out.

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Grace Halliwell: He was not a homosexual! He just loved his mother.

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Kate Eliot: What's he like, the Italian?

Mr. Eliot: He's Married. That's what he's like.

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Jake Diadoni: The Cisco Kid didn't come, Daddy.

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Jamie Diadoni: Don't get caught, Jake.

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Monica: I hate bloody writers!

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Monica: You've been bang at it with the juvenile lead since the read-through!

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Monica: A two-week run at the Edinburgh Fringe in a Space the size of a TOILET, and you think you're bloody *Chekov!*

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Monica: Who do you think I am? What do you think I do with my life? I'll tell you what I do, I work for a living, I teach a bunch of masturbators English Literature - who think A Room with a View is a Chalet at Butlins and that a Gingerman is a biscuit - and I feed and clothe my children. Ha! My children! Have you seen my children? Have you? And I put on plays in Town Halls that nobody comes to see. And I put on plays in Town Halls that nobody comes to see in the faint hope that I will meet someone who might find me desirable and give me a damn good seeing-to!

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Playwright: I don't have to take this! I have CONTACTS at the Royal Shakespeare Company!

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Mr. Eliot: All I ever wanted was that land!

Kate Eliot: What a shame you never wanted something more. Like the love of a good family. Because when he'd finished with her, he started on me. And I don't think he'd finished with her, actually.

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Julie Diadoni: At least someone knows we're here. Welcome to Nursing.

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Julie Diadoni: But he mixes, doesn't he?

Headmistress: Well, he doesn't sit all alone in the corner and cry!

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Julie Diadoni: You never once found the joke funny. So I decided it wasn't a joke.

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Monica: And I read palms at parties because when I was young and impressionable I read a BOOK on how to read palms and impress people.

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Jamie Diadoni: But the Good don't die Young. The Young die Good.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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