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When first renting this film, I expected to see a typical love story. I
found, instead, a film that truly attempted to accurately display what
happens in relationships where one member has a drinking problem. It is
powerful and shows the true pain and confusing that often looms over these
situations.
Rather than sending Alex to detox and having her come home happy, she came
home very confused about life and what she was doing. This is one of the
many ways this film reflects true life. My only qualm is the ending.
Rather than keeping true to the story, the filmmakers seemed to give up and
ended it on a happy, superficial note. Despite this letdown, I love this
film and everything it tries to communicate.
Meg Ryan's performance is one of the underrated of the decade. She should
have received on Oscar nomination for it and was certainly better than
Jessica Lange that year. I have read a few comments here saying she did a
terrible job. I would ask these people to define what a good performance is
to them. Not only did Ryan communicate every possible feeling that a woman
in Alex's situation could have, she did it with style and ease. Not only
that, but made a dramatic move with this film from her already great
performances in romantic comedy. Ryan should be applauded for taking such a
huge risk and having it pay off.
Andy Garcia also has a tremendous performance in this film. He too displays
very complex emotions of a faulted man with skill.
The one aspect of this film that I love so much is how no character is
faultless in the whole situation. All members have contributed to the
problem, and all must face up to what they did and try to improve what they
have. I don't know if this makes much sense (I feel my thoughts are
jumbled). In one simple statement: SEE THIS MOVIE. THE TITLE DOES NOT
ACCURATELY DISPLAY THE MOVIE IT TRULY IS. The title makes it sound like
another sappy love story. What the viewer gets is a tremendous study of the
damage alcoholism can bring to a family.
I first saw this movie in the theater when it came out. I remember
feeling
frustrated. I watched it again last night on satellite and decided this
really is a great movie, but it is hard to watch. It is a very real love
story, but don't confuse that as meaning it is a typical romantic
story.
Meg Ryan and Andy Garcia play a couple definitely in love, but struggling
with their relationship after Meg Ryan's character comes back from detox.
Instead of being cured, she is confused and they realize there is a wedge
that comes from an experience they can't share. She has AA friends that
her
husband can't relate to, but she needs someone who can understand and her
husband isn't it.
One mark of great writing is when the characters are not saintly or
demonic,
but shades of grey. Andy Garcia's character is a really nice guy, but
he's
not saintly. He resorts to sarcasm out of his frustration in not being
able to help his wife. Of course, she doesn't want his help, she wants
his
understanding. She is basically a good person, but she can't sort through
her feelings and ends up being unknowingly cruel to her
husband.
After one scene, my wife stated, "Now HE frustrated me". I said, "I was
frustrated too, but BY HER". This movie really pegs male and female
relationships.
Superbly written, superbly acted. It hurts to watch it, but a movie that
can
evoke real emotion and not pander to the audience with contrived plot
lines
is a great movie. THIS is a great movie.
This movie has me in tears throughout; it portrays the mixed
feelings, emotions and total confusion of an alcoholic wife and
mother so perfectly - and I should recognize them, as an alcoholic
of 10 years myself. Especially moving is the wonderful
performance of the elder child "Jessie" - an amazing achievement
in one so young. It certainly strengthened my resolve never to go
down that path again. I recommend it to all families of alcoholics
for an insight into our way of thinking - our shame, our inability to
control our own addiction, and the possibilty of real recovery.
Thank you, all involved.
I saw this movie the first week when it came out and absolutely fell in love with it. My parents were alcoholics and seeing what the little girls had to go through is what made me cry so hard. I could see many reflections of my sister and I in Meg Ryan's daughters. Both her and Andy Garcia's performances were outstanding. I would recommend this movie if you have personally dealt with alcholism, or if you have been the victim of someone's abuse, because it helped me come to terms with some issues that I had been struggling with.
OK, 1st of all, I`m not the type who goes for this kind a movie. I have
seen it accidentally by borrowing a tape from a friend of mine, years ago.
When the movie started, I said I`ll give it 10-15 minutes to.... "prove
itself". And it did!!!
The 1st 10 minutes of the movie are excelent. When Garcia approaches
Ryan
and they are acting like they "go for each-other". Everybody who watches
this scene for the 1st time, will definitely fall for it.
I`m not going to "yeap" about this movie. It is so good(at least I
liked
it) that I ended up buying it. By now, I have rewatched it a few time and
I
still didn`t or couldn`t get "over it".
Best family drama movie I`ve ever seen. 10 out of 10.
Very good romance drama that documents accurately a general U.S. middle class family affected by alcoholism.This movie is more about information and reflection on the subject than about entertainment.If you are an information starved person or a person who really enjoys reality based family dramas,you will love this one.This movie will also be more appreciated if one is familliar with a family in this situation because to most who have not seen anything like it in real life,this movie will come off as improbable although it is not.Thus we have a diverse direction of opinions from various people about this movie.The overall production is good (I've seen better).The performance of Ryan is very good but I expected more from Garcia although his performance was adequate enough.Many people also felt tricked by the movie because it seemed to be promoted/packaged as a typical feel good formula romance drama/comedy.......
This movie is excellent! I always fall for love stories, but this one was
different. It made me understand and think. I began to understand the works
of alcoholism. What people go through before de-tox and after. Their
emotions all mixed up, and etc. I first watched it on satellite a few months
ago when I read the description and saw that Meg Ryan was co-starring in the
film. (Meg is one of my favorite actresses of all time.) I sat down and
watched it and fell in love with the first minute! At times I would be
frustrated at the man who sometimes was a smart alleck. and sometimes the
woman would make me angry because she didn't realize how much he wanted to
help her. This is a unique romantic story and should be watched for all ages
because it warns you about alcoholism.
10/10
Meg Ryan is very good in this role, but after watching this again, and
noticing the Andy Garcia role more pronounced, his contribution is more
complicated and nuanced.
Anyone who has experienced similar issues of substance abuse, whether a
family, friend or significant other, will recognize the patterns;
denial, rage, hostility. Particularly effective is the role of Alice's
child; the older daughter who is often on the receiving end of her
drunken hostility.
The time she spends in detox could have been delineated more clearly;
Philip Seymour Hoffman is good in a brief role, as a fellow patient.
The pain and rage that Meg Ryan lives with is just beneath the surface,
even as Garcia, puzzled, says ..."well you work, you are
functioning"..., and she reveals to him that she drinks a fifth of
vodka every day, even at work. It shows how the non-alcoholic cannot
fathom how someone can function and seem straight, even while on the
job. She is a "functional alcoholic". Her brief encounter with her
mother (Ellen Burstyn) indicates why she would not be willing to admit
to the problem for many years.
This is a good film because it shows there are no concrete answers,
while Garcia would like to save his marriage, he sees that there are
several reasons he may have enabled Ryan and her addiction. While she
is attending AA and getting better, he realizes he almost feels jealous
of her. There are many layers to his performance, and as he realizes he
can no longer live with himself as a co-dependent, he eventually
chooses to separate.
Overall a very good and effective film about substance abuse issues,
the breakdown of family, and communication issues. 10/10.
Simply put, When A Man Loves A Woman is the best story about family in America since Ordinary People and Shoot The Moon. If that sounds a bit overblown -- too bad, because it's true. As a self professed fan of foreign films, this film manages to take an honest look at alcoholism and relationships rarely seen in American films. The actors inhabit a whole life here -- they feel like a real family with entire past lives. Every actor hits the right tone -- Meg Ryan is commanding, Andy Garcia simply takes his time, as does Tina Majorino, who gives a performance alongside Haley Joel Osment's in The Sixth Sense. Another rare take the script accomplishes (with Garcia's considerable help)is conveying Michael's emotional life and struggles with loving his wife in an expected - a layer also unseen in American films. This story asks uneasy questions and dosen't always profess to know the answers -- and sometimes, that's all we have.
Normally Meg Ryan is in those annoying fluffy films playing her annoying fluffy character whose one vice is eating too many corn chips or watching too many romantic movies. Here, however, is a film that does show case her considerable acting talent, and her vices are slamming down a bottle of vodka before ten in the morning, slapping her kid around, hoarding prescription pills and harrassing the neighbours. This is an unexpected gem. I also have very personal reasons for loving this film, having watched it with a friend and having to miss the last five minutes to catch a train, then going to watch it all over again on the Champs Elysees in Paris just for the ending, and then watching the other night when it was screened late on tv, in that hour where they bung in movies they don't know what to do with, and was reminded of how good it is. It is the strength of characterisation that works so well, esp the two girls. The hurt of the elder girl when she says that she just wanted to tell her mum she'd done her homework is brilliantly conveyed. That smarting sense of injustice and incomprehension regarding the adult world and its hypocrises gets me every time. Andy Garcia bloody gorgeous too.
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