Police Academy: Mission to Moscow (1994)

User Rating:

2.5/10   

Director:

Alan Metter

Writers (WGA):

Neal Israel (characters) &
Pat Proft (characters) ...

Release Date:

26 August 1994 (USA)

Genre:

Comedy | Crime

Tagline:

Kicking buttski. Making you laughski. The Academy is backski!

Plot:

The Russian government hires the veterans of the Police Academy to help deal with the Mafia.

Plot Keywords:

Moscow | Police | Mafia | Captain | Commandant

Cast

George Gaynes	...	Cmndt. Eric Lassard
Michael Winslow	...	Sgt. Larvelle Jones
David Graf	...	Sgt. Eugene Tackleberry
Leslie Easterbrook	...	Capt. Debbie Callahan
G.W. Bailey	...	Capt. Thaddeus Harris
Christopher Lee	...	Cmndt. Alexandrei Nikolaivich Rakov
Ron Perlman	...	Konstantine Konali
Claire Forlani	...	Katrina
Charlie Schlatter	...	Cadet Kyle Connors
Richard Israel	...	Adam Sharp
Gregg Berger	...	Lt. Talinsky
Vladimir Dolinsky	...	Bellboy
Pamela Guest	...	Anchorwoman
Stuart Nisbet	...	Anchorman (as Stuart Nissbet)
David St. James	...	News director

Also Known As:

Police Academy 7: Mission to Moscow (USA) (alternative title)

MPAA:

Rated PG for comic sensuality.

Runtime:

83 min

Country:

USA | Russia

Language:

English

Color:

Color

Aspect Ratio:

1.85 : 1

Sound Mix:

Dolby

Certification:

Germany:6 | Iceland:L | Finland:K-7 (DVD rating) | Netherlands:6 | Australia:PG | Finland:K-8 | Norway:11 | Singapore:PG | Spain:T | Sweden:11 | UK:PG | USA:PG

Filming Locations:

Moscow, Russia

Company:

Warner Bros. Pictures

Trivia:

Michael Winslow's bike scene caused a bit of controversy as he was unknowingly transmitting his funny noises through a secure military channel. When confronted with the rightful authorities, everything was cleared up when they recognized Winslow from his previous movies.

Goofs:

Continuity: In Callahan's kidnap scene cadet Connors is on the roof of the car. The windows change from almost closed to fully open between shots.

Quotes:

Captain Thaddeus Harris: Not exactly a four star hotel, is it?
Lieutenant Talinsky: Well, we spend our police budget on fighting criminals, not on pampering out of town visitors.
Captain Thaddeus Harris: It was your government that brought us here!
Lieutenant Talinsky: They also bring in monkeys for zoo, but we don't put them in four star hotel either!

Movie Connections:

Referenced in I Want Candy (2007)

Soundtrack:

Am I Blue?

"They've been doing this act for over a hundred years."

What is it that's so resolutely unfunny about Mission to Moscow? Is it the lifeless direction? The disinterested performances? The lack of atmosphere? The joke-free script? It's all of these things, of course, but there's also something inexplicably poor about it that you just can't quite put your finger on.

The regulars are the major weak point. While the guest cast have the misjudged enthusiasm to irksomely overact, all the usual culprits seem embarrassed by the whole thing. None of them sell their underwritten, reheated lines, and the fact that Bubba Smith and Marion Ramsey failed to sign up is a damning indictment. What comes through the screen, from George Gaynes to David Graf, is the sense of souls bleeding. "Please get me a proper job, there must be a better way to pay my mortgage" these actors scream with every fibre of their being. Leslie Easterbrook gets her usual single "my character's got big breasts" joke - why does she even bother to sign up for this crap? Michael Winslow looks old, tired, and frankly bored with the whole thing. Was his involvement only confirmed at the last minute? Because while he gives a curiously muted performance throughout, the script also fails to accommodate his talents in almost any way. Note that this is the ONLY Police Academy sequel in which he doesn't do his (admittedly run into the ground) "Bruce Lee" schtick.

Police Academy managed to keep up the same level of quality between films three to six - they were all rubbish. But even by their low standards Mission to Moscow plumbs the depths, making Citizens on Patrol look like Annie Hall. New recruit Charlie Schlatter, there for the completely incongruous love interest theme, is never funny and the Russian characters are the crass stereotypes you'd expect. Any film that promises "we're going to kick buttski" is clearly dumber than is tolerable, and a tasteless reference to Chernobyl doesn't help matters.

The only Police Academy film made outside the 80s, it was produced five years after the last one - why?!!?? Was there a big demand in the market for sh*te? Some cartoon sound effects (whistles, birdcall, etc.) are added to the action to try and pep things up, but this really is a DOA of a movie. True to form (or should that be formula?) it ends with an extended chase sequence that is neither suspenseful nor convincing.

Just look at scenes like the one where G.W. Bailey gets hit in the face with stew. The stew is clearly missing his face and just lands on his chin, so Bailey (the only regular who tries) moves his face so that the full brunt of the stew will land on it. This dedication to duty is admirable, but also perfectly highlights the sloppy desperation of the whole thing.

The series' move from the teen fodder of the first two, 15 certificate, movies had been subverted into the last five, PG cert entries. This is at its lowest ebb here; a comedy that seems wholly aimed at the under-5s and doesn't know what to do with its characters. Russian acrobats entertain the kiddies while its ... er... "stars"... are left to stand around like second bananas, giving unfunny reaction shots.

Maybe it's the "fish out of water" feel of it all, with the somewhat flat Russian espionage themes failing to ignite. But whatever it is, Mission to Moscow feels like a TV sitcom with the canned laughter track removed. In any other franchise this would be described as an "unfortunate, sad end" to the series. With Police Academy however, finishing with one of the unfunniest comedies of all time seems strangely apt. 2/10.