Eleven-year-old North has had it with his parents. They are always busy with their careers and don't give North the attention he needs, so he files a lawsuit against them. The judge rules ... See full summary »
Huckleberry Finn is a young boy in the 1840's, who runs away from home, and floats down the Mississippi River. He meets a run away slave named Jim and the two undertake a series of ... See full summary »
Courtney B. Vance,
Vada Sultenfuss is obsessed with death. Her mother is dead, and her father runs a funeral parlor. She is also in love with her English teacher, and joins a poetry class over the summer just... See full summary »
Jamie Lee Curtis,
Vada Sultenfuss has a holiday coming up, and an assignment: to do an essay on someone she admires and has never met. She decides she wants to do an assignment on her mother, but quickly ... See full summary »
Jamie Lee Curtis,
Eleven-year-old North has had it with his parents. They are always busy with their careers and don't give North the attention he needs, so he files a lawsuit against them. The judge rules that North should either find new parents or return to his own parents within two months. Thus north starts off on an hilarious journey around the world to find the parents that really care about him. Written by
Peter Huiskes <email@example.com>
When North is in Alaska, and the family is walking their grandfather to the shore, the ceiling of the studio that the scene is filmed in is visible. See more »
Remember, kid, if you can't stand the heat, stay out of Miami.
What metaphor is that?
What metaphor? You ever been down there in August? Your balls stick to your leg like crazy glue.
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Scarlett Johansson is credited as Scarlett Johanssen. Her surname is spelt wrong! See more »
This review may contain spoilers I watched this movie for the first time on youtube the other day, just to see if this movie was really as bad as all the reviews said.
And it was.
First of all, there's the lame premise. The boy called North (Elijah Wood) is a darling little overachiever who is upset because his parents don't appreciate him. Not that he's abused or anything (his house looks like it costs a million dollars, and it's all paid for by his father's job as a "pants inspector" and the "pants inspector" jokes are just the first in the long list of cheesy one-liners this movie is filled with) but his parents commit the great crime of not paying attention to him at the dinner table.
And then there's what follows, which is North's journey to "divorce his parents" who are so shocked to hear the news that they both fall into a coma (and for some reason are later put on display at a museum) and the judge tells Noth he needs to find new parents before the summer is over.
This journey takes North to Texas, Hawaii, Alaska, and onwards, where North meets auditioning parents, whose character portrayals take ethnic stereotyping to point that is so desperate and over-the-top that it makes you want to puke (seriously? Kathy Bates putting black-face on to portray an Eskimo? REALLY??) Every character in this movie is stupid, vulgar, and cold-hearted to the point of sadism. What kid's movie has a subplot involving a elementary-school newspaper editor planning to assassinate his fellow classmate in order to make said classmate into a "martyr"? And what is the point of Bruce Willis's character? He's supposed to portrayed as a "guardian angel" who follows North along his journey, (being portrayed as an Easter Bunny, a cowboy, a beach bum, a FedEx driver, and a sleigh driver) but he's incredibly unhelpful and only serves to throw in some phony pseudo-philosophical gems of wisdom dabbed with more lame jokes.
The best parallel I can make with this movie is to compare it to that Rebecca Black's notorious music video "Friday." When you see it, it is so bad that you cannot believe it can possibly be real.
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