IMDb > Camp Nowhere (1994) > Memorable quotes
Camp Nowhere
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Memorable quotes for
 Camp Nowhere (1994) More at IMDbPro »

Karl Dell: Check or plastic?
Dennis Van Welker: Cash.
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Walter: Who would think something like this would happen from harmless flares and roman candles?
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Steve: This bites.
All: Yeah.
Heather: We should just go home.
All: Yeah.
Steve: At least at home they have cable.
All: Cable.
Arnold: Baywatch.
Guys: Baywatch.
Walter: Baywatch.
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"Mud": Dad! Just because I'm smart doesn't mean I can't act stupid.
Zach: If Mud's guilty I am too.
Gaby: Me too! I'm smart enough to act stupid.
Trish: Yeah and I'm stupid too! Well... you know what I mean.
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Dennis Van Welker: You know, back in the '60s when we said we wanted to change society, maybe we should've been more specific.
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Fein: Back in the 60's, some hippies came here and turned the place into a commune. You know, sex, and drugs, and debauchery.
Dennis Van Welker: Knew I'd been here before.
Gaby: Eww! You did that stuff here?
Dennis Van Welker: No... not *here*.
[Takes a step to the right and nods]
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Arnold: Relax... it'll be fine... I mean we're not complete morons!
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Lt. Eliot Hendricks: Fleur... what the hell are you doing?
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Gaby: [on Dennis Van Welker] Last year, he tried to do 'Silence of the Lambs' as a musical.
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Karl Dell: I'm freezing my nuts off out here!
Zach: You can thaw em' out later.
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Dennis Van Welker: Do you know what the first rule of the theater is, Mud?
"Mud": No...
Dennis Van Welker: [shouts] Talk loud enough for people to hear you!
"Mud": OK... so...
"Mud": [shouts] Are you gonna help me?
Dennis Van Welker: Much better... No.
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"Mud": [complaining about his parents] Jesus, they talk about me like... I'm unemployed or something.
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"Mud": Zach, you're gonna put somebody's eye out!... I'm turning into my parents.
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Dennis Van Welker: [some advice to Mud] Here's what you do: get lost! Disappear into the woods for five or six hours. When you show up they'll be so glad you haven't been eaten by bears, they'll forget the other stuff!
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"Mud": Maybe we could go out when you get b... chests?
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T.R. Polk: [after getting the money for Dennis' car] You're a little short.
"Mud": Well... you're a little fat.
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Zach: I just gotta say... THIS IS MAJOR COOL,YEAH!
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Zach: You know, if you were wearing a skirt right now, I'd be in heaven.
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Grocery Checker: Can I see your ID? You gotta be 19 to buy this stuff.
Zach: No problem.
Grocery Checker: You were born in 1963?
Zach: Yeah.
Grocery Checker: And that would make you?
Zach: 21.
Grocery Checker: Wrong. It's 1994. That would make you 31.
Trish: Wrong! If he was born in 1963, and he's 21, then it's 1984! Uh!
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"Mud": Who's this?
Dennis Van Welker: Winston Churchill. Jimi Hendrix of the spoken word.
"Mud": Who's Jimi Hendrix?
Dennis Van Welker: Michael Jordan of the electric guitar.
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Lenny: [Quoting lines from "A Streetcar Named Desire"] This is my *goddamn* house, and I'll talk any *goddamn* way I want to!
Debbie: Now, Stanley, there's no cause to use such language to Blanche!
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"Mud": I'm in hell. Shoot me.
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[the twins are arguing over what city to "bomb"]
Ashley, Twin: Minneapolis!
Amber, Twin: Milwaukee!
Ashley, Twin: Minneapolis!
Amber, Twin: Milwaukee!
Ashley, Twin: But Grandma lives in Milwaukee.
Ashley, Twin, Amber, Twin: [beat] Milwaukee!
[Milwaukee explodes]
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"Mud": How could you invite her over?! She's going to find out!
Dennis Van Welker: Mud, in a couple of years, two things will happen. One, you'll grow a ridiculous mustache that looks fruit mold on your upper lip. Two, you'll suddenly understand why men invite charming, attractive women to dinner.
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