Life with Mikey (1993)
Michael Chapman: But that's what show business is all about. Acting like an idiot. It's not you, you're just doing your job. You know what I mean. Look at it this way, most people feel like idiots most of the time. But they don't get paid for it.
Michael Chapman: Any chance for getting time off for good behavior?
Barry Corman: [after vomiting in a hat] Never again. From now on, it's only Kosher franks.
Barry Corman: [after seeing Angie for the first time] Va Va Va Vroom. Well, Hello Dolly!
Ed Chapman: [after Mikey tells him he invited Angie to his house] Well, now representing the Omen. Did you check her head with a little 666?
Michael Chapman: Yeah, there were only two sixes, we got her just in time!
Geena Briganti: [after Asian girl sings] I love that song.
Michael Chapman: Me too, what were you playing?
Michael Chapman: I'm something of a celebrity.
Irate Man: What kind of celebrity are you, Asshole of the Month?
Michael Chapman: No, that's all political.
Angie Vega: I'll have coffee.
Galaxy Waiter: [laughs] Coffee?
Angie Vega: Yeah, coffee, it comes from beans, ever heard of it?
Barry Corman: How much of this crap do I have to eat anyway, what am I, Jobe?
[on the set of a cereal commercial]
Barry Corman: You two clowns leave while I get into character.
Michael Chapman: What character, all you gotta do is swallow.
Girl: [overacting] I hate it when it's raining, we don't get to go outside for recess or ride our bikes after school!
Angie Vega: That's great, but you're not gonna audition like that, right?
Girl: What do you mean?
Angie Vega: They're just cookies, don't make it sound like a commercial for hemorrhoids.
Ed Chapman: Why isn't she in school?
Angie Vega: I'm off for the holidays.
Ed Chapman: Christmas is two weeks away.
Angie Vega: I'm very religious, you got a problem with that?
Santa: What would you like for Christmas, little girl?
Angie Vega: I'd like you to find a chimney, and shove your...
Mr. Corcoran: [LOOKS TOWARDS ANGIE] This girl got some spirits!
Michael Chapman: Hey Geena . How's it going?
Geena Briganti: Mr Corooran Absolutely loves ANGIE. She got the job!
Michael Chapman: SHE GOT THE JOB! SHE GOT THE JOB! SHE GOT THE JOB! YES ! OKAY!
Michael Chapman: Alright, I'll be calm, I'll be calm...