The Wrigley's annual trip to the Hoover Dam turns into a competition with another family. Don, who wants to keep his title as "King Of The Road", tries to beat them there. But frequent bathroom breaks and lack of family spirit threatens to tear it apart.
When their school marching band is invited to the Regional Championship Ellen is picked to be the dot in the "i" of "Squid." Big Pete takes it upon himself to free the band and Ellen from Mr. Markle's "full frontal mind meld." Meanwhile, Little Pete is stuck on an endless tour of Bus Driver Stu's shattered romance with Sally Knorp.
Big Pete signs up for shop class thinking it to be a usual class. However, Mr. Slurm, the shop teacher, has it in for him and chooses Big Pete to build a "special project". Elsewhere, Little Pete sells insurance cards to other students.
Big Pete neglects his studying for an important Social Studies test and then has an epiphany after taking another look at what he did. Meanwhile, Little Pete and his gym teacher clash over the latter's strict rules.
Grandfather Wrigley pays a visit and along with him is his most prized possession, Don's lucky bowling ball. The two of them plan to pass it down to either the two Petes. From then on, the brothers and their relationship spirals out of control.
Little Pete controls underground radio station WART along with Artie. Little Pete then decides to start his own band. However, the neighbors aren't too tickled about the racket every day and night as they rehearse.
Big Pete accidentally kills the school mascot, the Squid, and only the Pete's and Ellen know of the secret. But when a hooligan named, Open Face, wants some dirt on Big Pete, he decides to get cozy with Ellen for some vital information.
On New Year's Eve night Little Pete looks back on his failed attempt at a resolution to change the world. As he sees it the only thing he needed was the Riley Retro-Fire Jetpack to fix countless problems worldwide. With the failures of seasons past he becomes more and more desperate for the $456.98 needed to buy the jet-pack. In this episode Little Pete enlists the help of Big Pete, Artie, and even Frank the crossing guard.