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Legend of the Roller Blade Seven (1992)

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In a post-apocalyptic world where rollerblading is the chief means of travel, the evil Pharoah sends his minions outside the Wheel Zone to abduct a psychic. The psychic has been trained in ... See full summary »

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Title: Legend of the Roller Blade Seven (1992)

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Cast

Complete credited cast:
...
...
The Black Knight
...
...
Kabuki Devil
...
...
...
Officer Daryl Skates
Rest of cast listed alphabetically:
Michelle Bellaman ...
Wheelzone Warrior
Ani Bilesky ...
Hawk's Bride
Elisa Chang ...
Wheelzone Warrior
Allison Chase ...
Stella Speed
Liselotte Christiansen ...
Hawk's Bride
Joe Coolness ...
Axxx Man
Angela Dobson ...
An O'ffenderette
Paula Eckert ...
Wheelzone Warrior
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Storyline

In a post-apocalyptic world where rollerblading is the chief means of travel, the evil Pharoah sends his minions outside the Wheel Zone to abduct a psychic. The psychic has been trained in the way of the samurai, but has shunned her training to become a Passive. Once abducted, her brother joins forces with others to try and rescue her, but they face many challenges from the Dark Side. Written by Ed Sutton <esutton@mindspring.com>

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis

Genres:

Action | Sci-Fi

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Details

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Release Date:

23 June 1993 (USA)  »

Box Office

Budget:

$1,200,000 (estimated)
 »

Company Credits

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Technical Specs

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Did You Know?

Trivia

Based on two books by author Scott Shaw. See more »

Connections

Edited from Return of the Roller Blade Seven (1992) See more »

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User Reviews

 
Abandon hope all yee that see this...
10 December 2003 | by (Auckland, New Zealand.) – See all my reviews

How do films like this get made? This is a terrible film. This 'film,' found at my local video store, had an extensive amount of dust on its case and was on the bottom shelf of the sci-fi section. There were very good reasons for this.

If you like the idea of porno women with the iq of Forrest Gump in leotards on rollerskates, this is the film for you. Obviously it has gratuitous nudity. What the hell else would you do with a film like this? I mean the director could have at least turned this into porn. This film would have been much more interesting then. Porno actresses on roller skates in the future. The premise is interesting and arousing. Rollerblade makes baywatch look like intellectual art.

It is not often I get a film and my flatmates jaws drop at the sheer awfulness of it. The effects are possibly the worst I have ever seen in a movie. Plan 9 looks like Lord of the Rings compared to this.

If you are like me and constantly search video stores for the worst amd most exploitative films that you can find, including porn. Then you should see this film just for that. Otherwise avoid this film at all costs. Or drink 2 dozen beers and throw it on, its guaranteed to cure insomnia. I actually fell asleep watching it despite my best efforts.


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Making a movie about paint drying would be better than this crap artofagression
Great review.. mjcwalina
Jackson should be strung up for making this horror Pluto_of_Pluto
How many times have YOU seen this movie? blackautt
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