2.1/10
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26 user 2 critic

The Roller Blade Seven (1991)

| Action, Sci-Fi
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In a futuristic society, a sword-wielding roller skater fights evil ninjas, punk roller skaters and is sent on an important rescue mission

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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
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Mark Richardson ...
Chopper
Selina Jayne ...
Roger Ellis ...
Claudia Scholtz ...
Kenneth H. Kim ...
Utility Ninja
Ani Bilesky ...
Hawk's Bride 1
Liselotte Christiansen ...
Hawk's Bride 2
Sam Mann ...
Axe Man
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Storyline

In a futuristic society, a sword-wielding roller skater fights evil ninjas, punk roller skaters and is sent on an important rescue mission

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Action | Sci-Fi

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Also Known As:

Brygada siedmiu mieczy  »

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Did You Know?

Trivia

Named number 27 of the 100 Best B-Movies of All Time by Paste Magazine in 2014. See more »

Quotes

Hawk: You have sent for me, Father Donaldo?
Reverend Donaldo: Hawk, sister Sparrow has been adapted and taken into our worst nightmare.
Hawk: You mean my sister that has become your sister?
Reverend Donaldo: Yes, our sister sister. You must go now to rescue her!
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Connections

Followed by Return of the Roller Blade Seven (1993) See more »

Soundtracks

Them Roller Blades
Written by Judy Henske, Donald G. Jackson, Scott Shaw
Performed by Judy Henske
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User Reviews

 
So bad you can enjoy it as a comedy
11 March 2001 | by (Melbourne, Australia) – See all my reviews

I knew that I was not about to see a quality film when this title was included in a 'B-grade video night' at a friends place. Despite the warnings, I was still surprised at just how bad this film was. It was fortunate that there were a lot of us there to share the pain with each other... The film attempts to tell the story of a dark future, one in which Hawk (a Mad Max type of character) heads off to rescue a damsel in distress. In reality, the plot is a thinly disguised excuse for the producers to promote their own philosophies on life (watch the end credits and the 'these people are not real' disclaimer at the end for a real laugh). The movie is frequently lacking direction, and fails to develop its characters to any degree whatsoever. What's even worse though is the editing of this film. The film repeats scenes (often 10 to 20 seconds long) up to 4 or 5 times in a row. I think that this was an attempt to emulate things like Jean Claude Van-Damme fight sequences, but if it is it fails utterly. The film would probably be about 1/3 of its length if we weren't forced to watch the main character move his head in front of the setting sun half a dozen times (yes, that's all that happens in that repeated scene). I give this movie my 'worst film I've ever seen' award. I doubt that it will be topped any time soon.


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