Rockula is about a male vampire who lost his lady love centuries ago. She was killed by a pirate with a rhinestone peg leg, wielding a large ham bone. Our hero, the vampire, did nothing to save her. So he is now cursed to watch her be born again in another life, and then watch her die, strangely enough by a pirate with a rhinestone peg leg, wielding you-know-what. Now, in 1990, he has, he suspects, his last chance to try to save her instead of watching get clubbed over and over again down through the years. Oh, and he becomes a rock star in the process. Written by
Shannon Quesnel <email@example.com>
This is quite simply the single most entertaining and enjoyable vampire movie i have ever seen. I mean, REALLY. Toni Basil singing and dancing her little heart out in a fantastic array of bizarre costumes (corset with hula skirt?), Dean Cameron dueling with the reincarnation of a pirate with a rhinestone pegleg over a steaming cryogenic storage chamber? THOMAS DOLBY as a music video producer/coffin salesman who drives what appears to be a replica of the DRAGULA car? SUSAN TYRRELL, excuse me, in cowboy chaps and a funny hat playing the fiddle? BO DIDDLEY (i'm dying here, i really am) in SPANDEX with GOLD RECORDS around his NECK?????? This is as good as it gets, my friend. Whether you're looking for cheesy songs you can more-or-less sing along with by the second replay, snorkeling midgets in bubble baths, or, i'm sorry but i've got to say it again, TONI BASIL IN A CORSET AND A HULA SKIRT, Dean Cameron dressed like Elvis, one-liners a-plenty, intellectual references (what play does Dean Cameron go to see with Tawny Fere? "The Hands of Egon Schiele"????? I'm going to COMBUST, seriously!!!!!!) or love, romance, and "Bat-Dork," this is the ONE, the ONE, THE ONE. Despite-- or perhaps because of-- the fact that this film dates from 1990, it is a concentrated syzygy (the total is greater than the sum of its parts) of everything that was fun and great about 80s film. Surreal, macabre, bizarre, and hilarious, this is a MUST SEE for everyone who thinks fondly of yonder 20th century. Actually, it's just a must-see for everyone. I love this movie so much i actually go into withdrawal if i don't see it at least every six months. Even now, i suffer.
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