Annie Wilkes: I thought you were good Paul... but you're not good. You're just another lying ol' dirty birdy.
Annie Wilkes: I am your number one fan. There is nothing to worry about. You are going to be just fine. I am your number one fan.
Annie Wilkes: It's the swearing, Paul. It has no nobility.
Paul Sheldon: These are slum kids, I was a slum kid. Everybody talks like that.
Annie Wilkes: THEY DO NOT! At the feedstore do I say, "Oh, now Wally, give me a bag of that F-in' pig feed, and a pound of that bitchly cow corn"? At the bank do I say, "Oh, Mrs. Malenger, here is one big bastard of a check, now give me some of your Christ-ing money!" THERE, LOOK THERE, NOW SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO!
Annie Wilkes: He didn't get out of the COCKADOODIE CAR!
Annie Wilkes: God came to me last night and told me your purpose for being here. I am going to help you write a new book.
Paul Sheldon: You think I can just whip one out?
Annie Wilkes: Oh, but I don't think Paul, I know.
Annie Wilkes: [Right after smashing Paul's ankles with a sledgehammer] God I love you.
Annie Wilkes: [turning to Sheldon] And don't even think about anybody coming for you. Not the doctors, not your agent, not your family. 'Cause I never called them. Nobody knows you're here. And you better hope nothing happens to me. Because if I die... you die.
Annie Wilkes: Anything else I can get for you while I am in town? How about a tiny tape recorder, or how about a homemade pair of writing slippers?
Paul Sheldon: No, just the paper would be fine.
Annie Wilkes: Are you sure? Because if you want I can bring back the whole store for you!
Paul Sheldon: Annie, what's the matter?
Annie Wilkes: WHAT'S THE MATTER? I will tell you "what's the matter!" I go out of my way for you! I do everything to try and make you happy. I feed you, I clean you, I dress you, and what thanks do I get? "Oh, you bought the wrong paper, Annie, I can't write on this paper, Annie!" Well, I'll get your stupid paper but you just better start showing me a little appreciation around here, Mr. MAN!
Annie Wilkes: Here's your pills.
Paul Sheldon: Annie? Annie, what is it?
Annie Wilkes: The rain. Sometimes it gives me the blues. When you first came here, I only loved the writer part of Paul Sheldon. Now I know I love the rest of him, too. I know you don't love me, don't say you do. You're beautiful, brilliant, a famous man of the world and I'm... not a movie star type. You'll never know the fear of losing someone like you if you're someone like me.
Paul Sheldon: Why would you lose me?
Annie Wilkes: Book's almost finished, your legs are getting better. Soon you'll be wanting to leave.
Paul Sheldon: Why would I leave? I like it here.
Annie Wilkes: That's very kind of you, but I'll bet it's not all together true.
[pulls out a gun]
Annie Wilkes: I have this gun.
[pulls the trigger]
Annie Wilkes: Sometimes I think about using it. I'd better go now. I might put bullets in it.
[Annie has just read Paul's latest novel]
Annie Wilkes: YOU! YOU DIRTY BIRD, HOW COULD YOU!
Paul Sheldon: What?
Annie Wilkes: She can't be dead, MISERY CHASTAIN CANNOT BE DEAD!
Paul Sheldon: Annie, in 1871, women often died during childbirth. But her SPIRIT is the important thing, and Misery's spirit is still alive.
Annie Wilkes: I DON'T WANT HER SPIRIT! I WANT HER! AND YOU MURDERED HER!
Paul Sheldon: No... I didn't.
Annie Wilkes: WHO DID?
Paul Sheldon: No one! She... she died! She just slipped away!
Annie Wilkes: SLIPPED AWAY! SLIPPED AWAY? SHE DIDN'T JUST SLIP AWAY! YOU DID IT! YOU DID IT! YOU DID IT! YOU MURDERED MY MISERY!
Annie Wilkes: MISERY IS ALIVE, MISERY IS ALIVE! OH, This whole house is going to be full of romance, OOOH, I AM GOING TO PUT ON MY LIBERACE RECORDS!
Annie Wilkes: Now the time has come. I put two bullets in my gun. One for me, and one for you. Oh darling, it will be so beautiful.
Paul Sheldon: Eat it till ya choke, you sick, twisted fuck!
Annie Wilkes: When I was growing up in Bakersfield, my favourite thing in the whole world was to go to the movies on Saturday afternoons for the Chapter Plays.
Paul Sheldon: [nodding] Cliffhangers.
Annie Wilkes: [shouting] I know that, Mr. Man! They also called them serials. I'm not stupid ya know... Anyway, my favourite was Rocketman, and once it was a no breaks chapter. The bad guy stuck him in a car on a mountain road and knocked him out and welded the door shut and tore out the brakes and started him to his death, and he woke up and tried to steer and tried to get out but the car went off a cliff before he could escape! And it crashed and burned and I was so upset and excited, and the next week, you better believe I was first in line. And they always start with the end of the last week. And there was Rocketman, trying to get out, and here comes the cliff, and just before the car went off the cliff, he jumped free! And all the kids cheered! But I didn't cheer. I stood right up and started shouting. This isn't what happened last week! Have you all got amnesia? They just cheated us! This isn't fair! HE DID'NT GET OUT OF THE COCK - A - DOODIE CAR!
Paul Sheldon: [long pause] They always cheated like that in cl... chapter plays.
Paul Sheldon: You know I never tasted meatloaf quite like this, what's your secret?
Annie Wilkes: My secret is, I always use fresh tomatoes, never canned. And to give it that extra zip, I mix a little Spam with the ground beef!
Paul Sheldon: Can't get this in a restaurant in New York.
Annie Wilkes: Oh, no.
Waitress: Excuse me, but are you Paul Sheldon?
Paul Sheldon: Yes.
Waitress: I just wanted to tell you I'm your number one fan.
Paul Sheldon: That's... very sweet of you...
Annie Wilkes: Oh forgive me Paul for prattling away and making everything all oogy.
Virginia McCain: [talking to Jim Taylor on the phone about Buster] No, he's not here. I don't know where he is, he never tells me anything any more. Probably out having an affair somewhere.
[Buster walks in]
Virginia McCain: Oh here he is.
[hands Buster the phone]
Virginia McCain: It's Jim Taylor, he wants to know who you're having an affair with.
Virginia McCain: [teasing Buster about a fake affair as she looks through the new Misery books] Well, whoever she is, she sure likes to read a lot.
Sheriff John T. 'Buster' McCain: Virginia, I'm flattered that you think I have that kind of energy. I figure that if I can't find Paul Sheldon, at least I'll find out what he wrote about.
Virginia McCain: Well, what do you expect to find? A story about a guy who drove his car off a cliff in a snowstorm?
Sheriff John T. 'Buster' McCain: You see, it's just that kind of sarcasm that's given our marriage real spice.
Paul Sheldon: [holding a page of his manuscript] Do you remember for all those years, nobody ever knew who Misery's real father was, or will they ever be reunited? It's all right here. Does she finally marry Ian, or will it be Winthorne? It's all right here.
Paul Sheldon: [lights a match]
Annie Wilkes: Paul you can't!
Annie Wilkes: [drops her glass]
Paul Sheldon: Why not? I learn it from you.
Paul Sheldon: [Burns his manuscript]
Annie Wilkes: What's the ceiling that Dago painted?
Paul Sheldon: The Sistine Chapel?
Paul Sheldon: I don't know if anyone could ever totally get over something like that... It's weird. Even though i know she's dead, I still think about her once and a while.
Virginia McCain: We got a phone call? Busy morning.
Sheriff John T. 'Buster' McCain: Yeah. Work, work, work.