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Jeff Dylan Graham
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Barrett J. Leigh,
When a virginal artist falls in love with a call girl, she turns out to be the chosen bride of the alien god Cthulhu. To save her, he must stop an ancient cult from summoning their god and destroying mankind.
David Phillip Carollo,
Nicolette le Faye
An aging magician harboring a terrible occult secret and his daughter are taken hostage in their isolated mansion by teenage scumbags need- ing a place to hide out. When the captors refuse to listen to the magician's dire warning to release him unharmed, the mansion slowly releases its nightmare of horrors on the unsuspecting invaders. Written by
I love B horror films, so I was expecting something that would at least make me laugh or perhaps keep my interest for an hour and a half. This movie was not even close to accomplishing either of those tasks. It amazes me how a production can be so bad in so many ways. There isn't a thing about this movie that makes it worth watching. The acting is bad, and not in a funny way. The actors look bored half the time. It's total s***. Why is it that these productions fail to live up to the standard of high school theatre? The plot is also garbage. The only thing borrowed from Lovecraft is the Cthulhu nomenclature. I mean, what does this movie even have to do with the Cthulhu mythos? Answer: absolutely nothing. The dialogue is so repetitive and inane... not even a bit of humour in it. The characters are also pretty flat. There wasn't a single one I cared about by the end of this monstrosity. The F/X (all 35 seconds of them) are also pretty bad. Again, not funny bad; just plain moronic.
The bottom line: I bought this from a local movie store (used) for $1. I should have bought a can of Pepsi, or played 4 games of Space Invaders. I am fanatical about bad trash cinema, especially horror, but I can't find a use for this thing at all. Bypass with extreme prejudice.
7 of 9 people found this review helpful.
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