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A guy called Eric owns a huge house and some greedy people want to build a mall over it. So they get someone to burn down his house. Eric is badly burned but not dead, and a year later the mall opens. What they don't realize is that Eric is living underneath the mall and he's very angry! Written by
"Is there a Phantom of Mall?" Folks are bound to ask! "Is He the Phantom of them all, or just some Retard in a broken Hockey Mask!"
Though I suppose it would be well possible to make a better movie about a shopping mall version of the Phantom of the opera, to the best of my knowledge no one ever has. Unless you count "Gremlins 2: The New Batch", on account of the fact that it featured a Phantom themed Gremlin. I don't count this though, so let's move on. Not only is "P.O.M" (as I shall now call it) the best movie ever to place the Phantom in a mall, but it is also the greatest (IE: only tolerable) Polly Shore movie ever made. This movie being made in 1988 before Polly Shore was famous enough to be allowed to act like Polly Shore in a film. Another nice touch is the fact that the front doors of the Mall are labelled "Mall Entrance." Really I though they were the entrance to something other than the building they're attached to like the magical world Narnia or something. Anyway the real draw of this film is it awesome musical theme. It's reminiscent of a better day when almost all movies had a rock'n song about their plot at the end, under Hollywood's "well it worked for Ghostbusters" policy. The song boldly dares to use such controversial terms as "Boobs" and "Retard". Point being if your not doing something productive to uplift the human spirt (which if you're reading my review on "The Phantom of the Mall" you and I both know you aren't) rent and watch this hidden jewel of cinema and make Mr. Polly "The Free World's Punching Bag" Shore a couple pennies richer. Go ahead, I dare ya!
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