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|Index||174 reviews in total|
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
This is one of the two or three worst movies ever made by anybody. How
anyone could have thought this was a good idea and how so many actors
with actual careers(including the once-formidable Cameron Mitchell)
could have agreed to be in this abomination boggles my mind. Space
Mutiny is so bad that it's funny all by itself, I watch it all the
time(at least the MST3K version) and I'm nowhere near tired of it.
What's wrong with it? Just about everything. It had no budget and its editing was so laughably inept that it had more continuity errors than any ten movies. Here are ten reasons why censorship is not necessarily a bad thing and why this movie ought to be banned from polite society: (1) All of its "outer space" footage was stolen from Battlestar Galactica.
(2) Since they didn't have enough money to create a fighter with actual controls, every shot of Our Hero, Reb Brown, in his Stingray Viper doohickey is a close-up. Apparently, you can fly those things merely by flipping switches on and off.
(3) They also didn't have enough money to create sets of the big ship, called the Southern Sun, so most of the interior shots of the "spaceship" are filmed in a factory/processing plant. So you can seen actual windows here and there and some of the walls of this "spaceship" are made of brick and the floors are made of concrete. And it's not a particularly clean "spaceship" either. In one shot, you can see Our Hero, Big McLargehuge's footsteps raising dust as he runs.
(4) Whoever designed the costumes of this thing hasn't seen a sci-fi movie made after 1957. Most of the woman were basically in bathing suits or miniskirts and some of the men were in these ridiculous things with ridiculously wide shoulders. Our Hero Slab Bulkhead's "spacesuit" was standard-issue 50's space movie and his helmet had lights that flashed for some reason. And some of the crew wore a patch with the Southern Sun insignia, a black patch with two S's in silver. Wonder if anyone had any second thoughts about that? Then there was Cameron Mitchell's ludicrously fake beard which brought out lots of Santa references in the MST3K version (5) The villain, a guy named Calgon(boo!), should have had a handlebar mustache given his tendency to cut loose with an evil laugh for no reason all through this thing.
(6) I still can't figure out how the chief engineer got the job at all considering that he sounded like a borderline psychotic for most of the movie.
(7) Apparently, in that time and space, "sexy" dancing consists of cavorting with hula-hoops to bad techno and showing one's rear end a lot.
(8) Several times during this thing, shots were reused. The same explosion, the same take by Calgon(boo!) and the same party happened more than once.
(9) In the climactic chase scene between Calgon(boo!) and Our Hero Bob Johnson, the two men banged golf carts repeatedly. Then Our Hero screams for some reasons and leaps out of his golf cart which slams into Calgon's(boo!) golf cart resulting in a huge explosion.
And the best one of all: (10) A woman is killed in one scene and is back at her post a few moments later.
Space Mutiny is so horrendous that it's positively impressive.
Well, I had to give this a 10 only because I don't feel it belongs at the
VERY bottom of the list, it does lack plot.. well ORIGINAL plot that is,
special effects, and ships, and.. well I think you get my drift, but, By
itself the movie is a tad cheesy.. BUT, when handed over to the crew of the
Satellite of Love it turns out to be fairly funny.. and I find myself
picking on it.. So PLEASE for the love of God, give this a little more
respect than a lousy 1 or 2.. I mean a 4 would be nice, not to mention
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
In the words of that wonderful jerk Lloyd Kaufman, "make the damn
movie!" And so they did. And lo, it was craptastic. And lo, thus spake
the Video Gods, "what manner of 'film' is this, with its ripping off of
stock footage from a rip off of STAR WARS, with its truly bold
disregard for narrative or irony? What 'film', indeed, could reach as
high for cinema glory and yet fall so far, landing with the same wet
SLAP as an anonymous henchman, thrown by cruel fate from a high place,
over a safety railing and onto the cold hard concrete of a star
cruiser's deck!?" And the Gods realized, it was no film, it was a SPACE
MUTINY, a mutiny in space, a title in search of a movie in search of a
And only by seeing this... 'film'... alongside its spirit-brother YOR THE HUNTER FROM THE FUTURE could the Video Gods or the viewer grasp the heady funk that permeates the film stock, that saturates Reb Brown's being and inundates the wall mounted keyboards and smothers the awesome "Enforcer" fleet. Only by seeing, could they disbelieve.
"No!" they cried, "This is low budget garbage! It has no right dressing up in someone else's space battles, in using someone else's industrial complex! What wyrd spell did the creators cast over John Phillip Law, that he would overact so grievously? What half formed fever-dream produced the bodacious 'Bellerians' and the grungy Galcti-Disco!? We demand explanation! We demand accountability!" But there was none to be had. The director and the producers, the editors and the best-boy and the clapper, had sunken into the depths of creative obscurity, yet there was no stopping the SPACE MUTINY. Like a wounded beast it flailed onto the video shelves, daring to be watched, daring to be endured... daring to be mocked by a lonely man and his puppets. Explanations, reasons, themes or resolution, all had no place in this movie's galaxy. Only ham-fisted acting, dubious editing, and half-baked monologues reigned. And so it shall be, until the future comes and the prophecy of the Bellerians, of the SPACE MUTINY, is borne out. Amen. Amen to Kalgan and to auto-reloading bazookas. Amen.
Endure the SPACE MUTINY. Be prepared.
I now think I have found the funniest sci-fi movie ever made, though I
am sure these folks would not appreciate this distinction, as it was
NOT intended as a comedy! In fact, this film is far funnier than "Space
I knew the film was a crap-fest when I noticed at the beginning that the space scenes were lifted straight from the TV show "Battlestar Galactica"! Think about it....they lifted scenes from a second-rate show to make a third-rate movie! To anyone who saw the original show, it's obvious!
The movie is about, of all things, a space mutiny. While I could talk about the whys and hows and all that, the bottom line is that the entire film is horribly written, horribly acted and the special effects are poo---and who really cares about the dopey plot--I know the film makers didn't!
John Phillip Law plays the most over the top and dopey bad guy--and he's even less subtle than Ming the Merciless from "Flash Gordon"! The way he laughed like a maniac and snarled all the time made you wonder HOW he could organize a mutiny--nobody that obviously deranged could get anyone to follow them (except, perhaps people with a net). In fact, those who did follow him apparently were blind, as all their laser shots missed their targets again and again. In fact, in scene after scene, the good guy took on several dozen baddies and ALWAYS won because they simply couldn't hit anything! Now this is NOT to say the good guys were all that accurate either. In the funniest scenes in the movie, there were super-low speed chases using bumper cars and literally the guys were 10 feet apart and kept missing!
The bottom line is that everything about this film screams "turkey" from start to finish. Everything is lousy and stupid...period. And, because it is so bad, you can't help but laugh, and laugh, and laugh! Some things to look and laugh at include the disco scene where ladies dance with hula hoops, the alien ladies who are all dressed like the women from "The 20 Minute Workout" who gyrate and the way Cameron Mitchell is dressed up like Santa! It's all a hoot--a bad movie that is so bad it makes you laugh.
Never have I laughed this hard. Space Mutiny is one of the single most
horrible movies I have ever seen.
Fans of MST3K will know what I mean when I say it compares to Manos: Hands of Fate in bad acting, and Zombie Nightmare in horrible script.
The "space age" motif with the clothing and 80's club scenes are great, and more then once I felt like as though I were stuck in simultaneous pain/hilarity.
One of the best parts about it was the pointless nature to the scenes with the alien women, in which they dance around in leotards and veils with globes bought frequently in ever souvenir shop since 1986.
A must see for any fans of bad cinema...I give this movie 10 stars and slap in the face to the writers.
This film is beautiful for so many reasons, and yet many do not see
that beauty. You have to look past the bad acting, bad special effects,
and cheesy dialogue to see it...But trust me, it's there. It's a prime
example of a film that's so bad it's good, grab some popcorn and some
friends and get ready for a night of side splitting fun. No you're not
going on a killing spree, this film has a bad movie appeal that will
leave a smile on your face afterwards instead of regret...Regret you
might feel after spending hard earned money on something like Kicking &
Screaming or whatever Will Ferrell's latest comedy vehicle is.
Space Mutiny is a bad film you won't regret, watch it for what it is. Sure, one could sit back and take a serious look at this film and dissect it critically, but I for one like to enjoy a film for what it is...And this film my friends, is pure "so bad it's good" gold. Melt it down in your critic's cauldron if you must, but why waste time taking a critical approach to something that was way ahead of it's time and reached new heights in bad movie history. It's one of the best of the worst in my book and deserves a spot on anyone's movie shelf who enjoys bad acting, bad dialogue, and bad films in general.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
In another context (I think it was during 'Devil Fish'), Crow T. Robot
from MST3K said that what they were watching wasn't so much a 'movie'
as sort of a 'movie loaf'. Ditto here.
This movie looks as if someone actually spent some money on it - they secured a decent cinematographer,some real stunt men and fight choreographers, built acceptable sets (except for the 'futuristic' computer banks with their wall mounted keyboards and Formica monitors and the laser equipped golf carts) and used good film stock and decent lighting, along with mostly OK costuming (excepting the spandex leotards for the women crew and the female lead); they even got two B grade actors who have been good in other features (Cameron Mitchell and John Philip Law). In fact, JPL is perfectly capable of carrying a film - see 'Diabolik',for instance- which gives hope that the movie might be watchable, in a SCI-FI channel movie kind of way.
But someone forgot to sit down and write a coherent story and script for all the actors, sets, swiped stock footage and fight choreography to be about. Instead we get a whole bunch of sequences that don't link together or go anywhere and a whole slew of story ideas and plot elements that trail off into nothingness. There are space witches in spandex; there are mutineers, there is jarring space battle footage from Battlestar Galactic juxtaposed with TRS-80 Color Computer graphics; there are inane golf cart battles; there are railing kills by the dozen; there is a kidnapping and rescue mission that affects nothing else in the course of the movie; there are 'counter measures' that never materialize and villains that give up for no apparent reason when the good guys are in retreat; there are 'space pirates' who are developed as a looming threat for the entire first half of the movie only to be defeated in 15 seconds when the Adama stand-in flips a switch and unleashes stock footage of two missile launches. That's a fair sampling of the way the movie fails to jell or come together in any way.
And there are MANY lapses in judgment and taste along the way that take this movie to the next level of absurdity. The big one is the casting of the leads. As Mike Nelson once said about Miles O'Keefe, Reb Brown isn't an actor, he's a Body. He can move well,and he can enunciate most of his lines without blowing them, but he is so far in over his head with this mess that it isn't funny. Far worse is the choice of Sissy Cameron as the female lead. She's 35 years too old for the part, far too brittle and self absorbed to be a Princess Leia stand-in and not all the Jazzercise, face lifts and Metrecal in the world can disguise it.
Worth seeing for the MST3K version, which is hilarious, or by itself as an object lesson in the importance of having an overarching vision for a movie before you start filming it.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
you won't stop laughing. one of the funniest and most ridiculous movies
i've seen. even with stolen footage from 'battlestar gallactica', you
just watch this movie and think "why the hell would anyone make this
movie?" and then you think, "i have no freakin' clue, but i sure am
glad they did." and then you take another puff.
well, despite its all star cast with superb delivery, reb screaming like a woman towards the end is the best part. that and tooth 'torture'. and the disco party. and the obviously evil guy. and the lasers that change direction as soon as they leave the barrel of the gun. and the go cart battle.
like i said, this movie is hilarious!!!
finally, my heart goes out to all the stunt men who lit themselves on fire for this flick. i sure hope all of them survived.
And by this I mean totally devoid of a SINGLE redeeming quality. I watched it on the MST3K compilation which also had a made-for-PBS stinker starring Raul Julia called Overdrawn at the Memory Bank, which my wife disliked, but I compared to The Matrix in idea and which predated The Matrix by many years, so I defended its spirit if not its quality (which was humorously questionable). After watching Spacy Mutiny (which I could tell was going to be a Star Wars rip-off just from the title, never mind that the "sexy" main characters names were Ryder and Lea) I told my wife that as far as compared to that ridiculous movie, Overdrawn at the Memory Bank was smart, thought-inspiring, and heartfelt. **I HATED SPACE MUTINY**! Of course, the "worst movie of all time" would be a few seconds (or a few hours) of a camera pointed at a pile of s*** still steaming, but nobody spent hours editing it, planning it, casting it, designing costumes, lights, set, directing it, choreographing the dancing aliens. People did this work for Space Mutiny, and none of it made this movie more interesting than a movie about a steaming turd. I was most impressed by all the work some programmer from Digital put into the special effects, and by special effects I don't mean the space fighting scenes (which were apparently stolen from Battlestar Gallatica), but the computer graphics (out of an early eighties home computer)which actually followed the plot of the movie better than the editor of the movie, who put scenes of a woman in the film after she was shot and killed by Calgon the incessantly laughing bad guy, five feet away from the "nightclub in space" where people danced with hula-hoops. I also was impressed by some of the stunt men, who threw themselves off of extremely high railings in interesting positions; too bad the particular fight they perished in (appently the climax of the movie) was horribly staged, the music was insipid keyboard noises, the main characters were in plain view and consistently shot at and missed from mere feet away. . . (I'm just stunned at the ineptitude of this film.) It was released in 1988, but couldn't have been made later than 1983, so I don't know how or why it was released. Having only seen the Mystery Science Theater version, I am assuming that there was a few sex scenes cut, otherwise the psychic-alien-sexy-women-dancing-with-plasma-balls Balarians were, so. . . unnecessary. . .(Shaking my head in disbelief). I recommend any MST3K video. Its just that I thought I was watching the last MST3K episode, cause I didn't think anything could get any worse, so they must have saved this one for last.
I think it is common knowledge by now that the 80s were being plagued
by a flood of all kinds of sci-fi movies in order to exploit the
tremendous success of the 70s "Star Wars" and "Close Encounters of the
Third Kind". We also don't have to discuss the fact that a majority of
these movies was complete and utter rubbish, to be perfectly frank. But
with "Space Mutiny", we don't just have a movie that is just a cheap
rip-off of Star Wars. Oh, don't get me wrong, it certainly is at heart,
but this movie actually accomplishes the herculean task of representing
the absolute, sad bottom of the barrel of the 80s sci-fi shlock. No,
"Space Mutiny" is not just "Solarbabies"-bad. We're talking about a
movie that is "Robot Holocaust"-bad, and if that does not scare you
away already, then you are tougher than the casual movie-goer.
With a movie this dreadful, it is difficult to decide where to begin with mentioning the various glaring faults this cinematic abomination tortured us with, but I think the no. 1 reason for this movie to suck so bad is the non-existent budget. At least I was unable to realize that this movie even had a budget higher than 1000$ during most of the scenes, and that's the death twitch for this flick. The story is supposed to take place in the far future, on a self-sustaining, gigantic space ship called "Southern Sun", carrying hundreds of people on a mission to colonize new worlds. Unfortunately, the sets and art design are unable to establish this premise at all. In fact, the inside shots of the space ship sometimes even give away the fact that some scenes were being filmed inside a warehouse, with the sun shining through the windows being visible in the background, and no effort to hide this embarrassing goof at all. Or take the futuristic vehicles, for example. Well, there actually is only one kind of vehicle on board of the Southern Sun: a golf cart. Yes, that's right. A golf cart. As if that wasn't bad enough already, it's getting worse when we are forced to watch an exciting chase sequence involving two golf carts...yuck, yuck, yuck. 90% of all the other action sequences revolve around shoot-outs between our "bold" heroes and the fiendish villains, with fake and cheesy laser beams having been edited into the picture afterwards, and needless to say, it looks laughably bad. And I am still at a loss of words in view of the fact that the footage of the Southern Sun and the unnecessary space battles has been taken directly from Battlestar Galactica (what does that tell you about the quality of the flick if the creators had to steal from Battlestar Galactica? Sad...), with no mentioning of the original source and with no permission by the creators of BG. That kinda tells us how much money was being spent on the special effects, alright, and as a result, we sometimes don't see certain events like a small shuttle landing in the hangar bay of the Southern Sun. Instead, we just see ridiculously cheap vector graphics on a computer monitor straight from the beginning of the 80s, with a voice over telling us what these animated lines and objects are supposed to represent. A similar sequence in the first Star Wars (the briefing shortly before the attack on the Death Star) was lightyears ahead of this crap, and even an Atari 2600 would have been ashamed of these computer graphics. Yep, this movie takes us into the far future, and that alone makes me buy this fact completely...just like the 80s disco onboard...
Okay, the "action" and "special effects" (I hate to mention these terms in the same line as this flick...) are among the worst the 80s have to offer, and unfortunately, there is no story to save this movie from falling apart. I won't even bother to go deeper into the countless plot holes this flick has to offer for critics (involving one unbelievably embarrassing continuity error within just 3 minutes...), but at least the actors deserve an "honorable" mention. If "Robot Holocaust" was the epitome of lifeless acting, then "Space Mutiny" is the perfect example for horrible overacting. Each and every single character over-emphasizes his or her lines to an extent that it becomes unbearable to listen to them, even though this certainly was an attempt to make the inane dialogue seem less stupid than it is. Especially the villain named Kalgon (responsible for the mutiny mentioned in the title) and the hero David Ryder are the lowlights in this regard, with Kalgon's overacted and clichéd villain lines and idiotic eeeeevvvvvviiiiilllll laughter being the icing on the cake. And don't get me even started on the chemistry between the characters, since I sure as hell did not notice any chemistry whatsoever, no-thanks to some horrible casting decisions (whoever chose Cisse Cameron as the female lead character and youthful *cough* lead should not be allowed to be in film business anymore).
The only way to watch this joke of a sci-fi film without suffering severe pain is to choose the MST3K version. Mike and the bots even make this dung to a hilarious experience, and their witty (and true) comments are a far better way to sum up the idiocy of this movie than any review possibly could. But since this is a review of the movie and not the MST3K version, there's no way this movie deserves anything above 1/10. Right on par with the worst the 80s have to offer.
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