Billy talking to the dog on the beach: Wanna know what it's like to be me dog? No? Well, I'm gonna tell you anyway. Being me is like... being me is like... ah geez I forget
Martin Falcon: [Martin walks into his house, drunken, to find a group of strangers] Oh great, I'm being robbed again, aren't I? Go Hamlet, kill, kill!
Martin Falcon: [Martin realizes his guard dog is soothed by intruders] What have you done to my dog? You broke my dog!
Daryle Shane: You have a lovely house sir.
Martin Falcon: Thank you. What's, what's the number to the police?
Mooch: Shhh! Don't tell him!
Billy: [Martin dials] Wait! Before you do that, can you write right here, 'To Billie, I'll never forget last night... '
Martin Falcon: [Puts down the phone] Was that you?
Jennie: Excuse me sir, are you Martin Falcon?
Martin Falcon: WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE?
Daryle Shane: Okay. We're going in there now, and anybody who doesn't act elegant is a douchebag.
Josh: I want you to know I think you're really different.
Daryle Shane: I can work really hard to be the same.
Daryle: Well I just figured that Rome, Paris & Bulgaria sound pretty good
Billy: What Bulgaria? Bulgaria's not in Europe.
Daryle: Of course it is stupid
Billy: You're ass...
Daryle: Think of all the clothes I could have bought in Europe
Billy: Ahh forget it. None of us speak European anyway
Martin Falcon: [walks in, drunken, to find his guard dog soothed by intruders] What have you done to my dog? You broke my dog!