Memorable quotes for
Throw Momma from the Train (1987) More at IMDbPro »

Owen: Where are you going?
Larry: I'm gonna kill the bitch. You want something?
Owen: Could you get me a Chunky?

---

Momma: Owen! Food!
Owen: In a minute, Momma.
Momma: Don't you "In a minute, Momma" me! Get off your fat little ass or I'll break it for you! I want two soft boiled eggs, white toast, and some of that grape jelly god damn it! And don't burn the toast!
Owen: Kill her, Larry.

---

Momma: He's trying to kill me! I asked for the salted nuts. He brought me the unsalted nuts. The unsalted nuts make me choke!

---

Momma: Who the HELL are you?
Larry: I'm Owen's friend.
Momma: Owen doesn't have a friend!
Larry: That's because he's shy.
Momma: No he's not. He's fat and he's stupid!

---

Larry: One little murder and I'm Jack the Ripper.

---

Momma: Your friend had an accident, he's dead! You go bowling and leave a corpse to take care of me!
Owen: He's dead?
Momma: See for yourself.
Owen: Larry! My friend, my friend... Larry!
Momma: "My friend! My friend!" You big crybaby. Go bury him in the yard before he stinks up the place.

---

Mrs. Hazeltine: [reading her manuscript] His guts oozed nice, like a melted malted.

---

Larry: You killed my wife, Owen!
Owen: No, I didn't... Yes, I did.
Larry: You're a sick man, Owen. You need care and I'm taking you to the police.
Owen: Did you know that Hawaii is a series of islands that was all spit up by the same volcano? I never knew that.
Larry: You killed somebody! You killed a person. You're a murderer. You took a life!
Owen: You're right. You're right, I'm no good. How could I do that? I'm a sick pers... cows!
[points at passing billboard]

---

Larry: Remember, a writer writes always.

---

Larry: Hate makes you impotent, Love makes you crazy, somewhere in the middle you can survive.

---

[Larry's been hit in the groin by Momma's cane]
Larry: [in pain] She's not a woman, she's The Terminator.

---

[Momma sees Larry for the first time]
Momma: Who the hell is this?
Owen: Oh, this is Cousin Paddy. He's coming to stay with us a while. Isn't that nice?
Momma: [suspiciously] We don't *have* a "Cousin Paddy".
Owen: [to Larry] You lied to me!
[Owen knocks Larry out with a frying pan to the head]

---

Larry: Class dismissed. I have an enormous head ache in my eye.

---

Momma: Get out of my way, you black bastard!
Larry: What?

---

[Larry is reading stories to the class]
Larry: Next is "Murder at My Friend Harry's" by Owen... Lift. "Chapter one: The night was humid."
[Closes the paper]
Larry: Class dismissed. I have a terrible headache in my eye.

---

Momma: Holy Shit! What a dream I was having! Louis Armstrong was trying to kill me!

---

Owen: Momma! You're alive!
[to police]
Owen: Old people - you have to reassure them.

---

Larry: The night was dry, yet it was raining.

---

Owen: [Larry has driven his car off the road and it's going downhill through a load of bushes. Sat next to him in the passenger seat is Owen] This is good. It's like the Flintstones car wash.

---

Owen: Larry! I can't breath!
Larry: Yes! That's because I'm choking you!

---

Mr. Pinsky, Creative Writing Student: It's a coffee table book.

---

Larry: [talking at Margaret Donner on TV] It's my life, Margaret. It's MY life and I want it back!

---

Mrs. Hazeltine: It's whacking material!
Mr. Pinsky, Creative Writing Student: Isn't that literature?

---

Owen: Why not?
Larry: Because I'm not a killer, Owen! I can't just wrap my hands around someone's neck and squeeze the life out of them!
Owen: Well at least meet her. Maybe she'd be someone you'd like to kill.

---

Larry: [referring to Owen's lousy murer mystery paper] It wasn't motivated.
Owen: Sure it was. The guy in the hat killed the other guy in the hat.

---

Mrs. Hazeltine: "Dive... DIVE" yelled the captain through the thing. So the captain pressed a button, or something, and it dove. And the enemy was foiled again!

---

Larry: [on the phone with Owen from Hawaii] Owen, what the hell did you do to my wife?
Owen: Ehh, I don't want to say over the phone. All I can tell ya is that I killed her last night.
[hangs up]

---

Rosey: He called her a very bad name, and said "I hate her! I wish she were dead!"

---

Beth Ryan: He didn't do it!
Police Sergeant: Well then who do you suppose did?
Beth Ryan: [after a pause to think] Somebody else!

---

Lester: [discussing Larry's stalled book] Man, you been on "The night was...” for six months!
Larry: Takes place in the Yukon.

---

Lester: [On why he thinks Larry didn't kill his ex-wife] All his life, Larry never did... anything.

---

Larry: [last line, while they are snorkeling out through the surf] Keep going a little further Owen, maybe somebody'll harpoon you!

---

Momma: [On the train] I'm getting the hell out of here.
[Stands up and walks off]
Momma: Too god damn sultry in here.

---

Related Links

Plot summary	Plot keywords	FAQ
User reviews	Trivia	Goofs
Main details	IMDb quotes browser	Search quotes section
Browse titles with quotes by letter    A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z Other

*