Identical script to official pilot except Kelly and Bud were played by Tina Caspary and Hunter Carson. Ed O'Neil felt the chemistry wasn't right and Kelly and Bud were replaced by Christina Applegate and David Faustino.
Season 1, Episode 1: Pilot5 April 1987
In the very first episode of this widely successful, ribald sitcom, Al Bundy has a chance of getting front row seats to the basketball game, but Peggy makes him stay home and meet their new yuppie neighbors, Marcy and Steve Rhodes.
Season 1, Episode 2: Thinnergy12 April 1987
Marcy introduces Peg to a new energetic diet to improve her marriage. Al, meanwhile, wants to part of it but learns if he tries the diet, he can persuade Peg to quit. He must then swallow his pride and admit to Peggy he loves her no matter what.
19 April 1987
There has been a rash of burglaries in the area, and the Rhodes' house is robbed and Al's car stereo is ripped off, both families seek alternatives: Steve and Marcy buy a guard dog that won't stop barking, and Al purchases a fire arm. One fateful night, the two methods of home defense butt heads, and it's not a pretty picture.
26 April 1987
Steve and Marcy plan to add a new room onto their house using their tax refund money. Al convinces Steve to make it into a billiards room while Peggy convinces Marcy to make it into an exercise room, which leads to an all-out battle of the sexes to see who will win.
3 May 1987
Al and Steve buy a beat up Ford Mustang off of one of Kelly's boyfriends. Soon they form a tight friendship while fixing it up like new. The only problem is they are neglecting their wives now that they spend every free minute with the car. Marcy gets to experience something in the backseat of the Mustang that she has always wanted to do and when Al finds out about it, he won't let her forget it.
10 May 1987
It's the Bundys' 16th wedding anniversary. Al plans to buy Peggy a very fancy watch, but unfortunately, his credit card gets declined. Dare he show up at the party without a present?
17 May 1987
Steve and Marcy decide that once is enough after they volunteer to watch Kelly, Bud, and the family dog Buck, after Al and Peggy go away for the weekend to a seedy motel in Wisconsin where Al wants to watch a boxing match on the cable TV system.
24 May 1987
Al takes Steve one evening to watch a poker game with his poker playing friends. Steve gets the feel of the game and sits in for one of the men, but he ends up losing his paycheck to Al. From then on, Steve tries to avoid Marcy to avoid telling her the truth about losing their mortgage payment money while Al plans to use his $300 winnings to buy a new fishing rod.
31 May 1987
To get the money to purchase a new VCR that Al won't buy her, Peggy takes a job in a department store of selling clocks, which takes the "fun" out of the Bundy marriage as a result of her absence, and Kelly and Bud getting stuck with Al for the evenings.
7 June 1987
Al gets a first-hand look at Luke's swinging bachelor life when he takes refuge at Luke's apartment after work rather than return home to finish an argument with Peggy over visiting her relatives for the weekend. Luke invites two women over at his place where one of them, an attractive but dim-witted airplane stewardess, tempts Al.
14 June 1987
While Steve is out of town for the week on business, Marcy starts having dreams involving a romance-minded Al which turns her dreams into nightmares, and turns off her sexual urges, prompting her to look into the source of her nightmares, while a clueless Steve asks Al for advice on Marcy's sudden lack of sexual needs.
21 June 1987
The near death of the playboy owner of Al's shoe store starts Al wondering why he's never visited the store. Feeling unappreciated Al decides to take drastic action.
28 June 1987
Personal problems and crises delay Al and Peggy's departure to the going out of business party of their favorite hamburger joint, "Johnny Be Goods," which range from Kelly being stood up from going to a party, Bud wanting to finish a remote-controlled car for a model car festival, to Marcy stranded at the Bundys wearing only a towel after staining her dress.
27 September 1987
The Bundys take a vacation to near-beautiful Dumpwater, Florida and stay in a cut-rate motel where an ax murderer that hates tourists, shows up every five years since 1967, and redneck locals begin to make bets on who the psycho will strike next.
27 September 1987
After a hair-raising encounter with the maniac, Al decides to get the family out of town. But they realize that they are trapped at the motel by a storm and the locals are unwilling to help them. Then things take a turn when Peggy is taken hostage by the ax murderer in a room and Al must rescue her.
4 October 1987
Steve takes Al to the vault at the bank where Steve works for a secret after-hours card game, and the next day, one million dollars is reported missing. Al is then treated like a king by Peggy and the kids as well as hostility from Steve all of whom mistakenly think Al stole the money.
11 October 1987
Al is loath to have Buck the dog neutered despite being threatened with lawsuits from numerous neighbors regarding Buck's "nocturnal carnal activities" resulting in "stupid, ugly puppies" from their dogs. Reacting to pressure from Peggy and a bizarre dream he has involving Buck becoming upright and articulate, Al makes a decision.
18 October 1987
While Al and Steve are occupied by a female employee who fixes the Bundy's refrigerator, Peggy invites Marcy to a strip club with the girls.
18 October 1987
Marcy loses her composure and her wedding ring when it slips into a dancer's briefs when she slips him a tip. Desperate to keep the news from Steve, Marcy sets out distracting him every chance she gets. However, Zorro the Stripper suddenly shows up at Al's house and returns Marcy's wedding ring to him, who gives it to Steve and tells him about where Marcy was the other night.
25 October 1987
Al gets heated up over the large phone bill and refuses to pay it, which results in the disconnection of the Bundy phone line, making him the target of hostility from Peggy, the kids and the Rhoades who now take the Bundys phone calls on their phone, especially the ones from Peggy's mother. To make matters worse, there's a streetlight that is also bothering Al which is keeping him awake every night.
1 November 1987
Al flunks his written drivers test the same day that Kelly passes hers, leading him confined to the house and unable to get to the racetrack to bet on an important horse race.
8 November 1987
Victory seems assured when Steve agrees to join the Bundys for a family team bowling match against Peggy's arch rival from high school, Mimi, and her obnoxious family. But Bud reveals that he doesn't know how to bowl because he has squandered his bowling lesson money, prompting Steve to coach Bud on the pointers of bowling.
15 November 1987
Steve returns home having grown a beard from a week-long rafting trip. He and Marcy get into a huge argument over his reluctance to shave it off, leading him to move in with the Bundys.
22 November 1987
Al, Peggy and Bud are part of a shopping mall softball team playing other mall teams. After losing a few too many games, Al demands that Peggy improve her softball skills or she is off his team. Meanwhile, Kelly's new boyfriend, Brian, asks her to prove her love to him by getting a tattoo.
6 December 1987
There's a new light in the neighborhood when Bud brings home an attractive, free spirited, 21-year-old artist named Tiffany on her way to art school in New York and everyone likes her, except Marcy for Tiffany steals the attentions of Steve as well.
20 December 1987
The Bundys' Christmas is rudely interrupted when a parachuting mall Santa crash-lands into their backyard, attracting the neighborhood kids.
10 January 1988
When starting a baseball card collection, Al and Steve sell Marcy's old Barbie doll. They must get it back, but they learn the shop they sold it to was robbed, so they would have to search downtown Chicago and ask every bum on the street.
24 January 1988
Al's attempts to get rid of a rodent in the Bundy house end badly.
7 February 1988
Al, under the impression that you don't have to pay for anything you didn't order, takes Peggy and Bud on a wild spending spree, and goes with Peggy to a fancy hotel for a weekend getaway when the mailman accidentally leaves a new credit card addressed to Buck the dog.
14 February 1988
On Valentines Day, Kelly hauls in a load of Valentines, while Steve plans to give Marcy a trip to Hawaii. When Marcy finds out from Peggy, she plans to give Steve his Valentine present by jumping out of a life-size cake. Meanwhile, Bud holds a vigil by the mailbox waiting for his first Valentine, while Peggy ponders over the decision on whether or not she'll get the gift she wants from Al for him to say "I Love You."
21 February 1988
The Bundys stay at the shoe store after their houses is tented for termites. A grounded Kelly plots to escape and go to a rock concert.
Season 2, Episode 19: Im-Po-Dent28 February 1988
Marcy regrets denting Steve's new car when he claims that she's made him impotent.
6 March 1988
While secretly going through Steve and Marcy's mail, Al and Peggy fill out an application to a TV game show called "How Do I Love Thee" where the objective is a Bundy natural: surviving physical torture from one's spouse. Al and Peggy appear on the show pretending to be Steve and Marcy and they easily win many prizes. But when Steve and Marcy find out, they appear at the end of the show pretending to be Al and Peggy, and the husband that survives the most torture in an electric chair wins a new car.
13 March 1988
After going with Steve to the racetrack, Al is reluctant to reveal that he won $1,200, because he knows that Peggy and the kids will take the money for themselves. While Al tries to throw off Peggy's suspicions with sex, Steve asks for increasingly exuberant bribes of Al's racetrack winnings so he will keep his mouth shut about the money.
1 May 1988
Al's quiet three-day weekend plans to watch his favorite John Wayne movie "Hondo" are ruined when Peggy's eccentric relatives come to visit the Bundy household. They include her unseen, obese mother, two feuding uncles; the hulking Irwin and the effeminate Otto, as well as a singing and dancing triplet of aunts whose showbiz career is threatened by Al's bad advice to them. Al then interrupts and ruins a romantic evening between Steve and Marcy to confide with his problems.
6 November 1988
Al discovers a library book that was due in 1957. He must return it to the library and face up to his worst, childhood fear: the librarian.
20 November 1988
When a perspiration stain on one of Al's shirts resembles a silhouette of The King of Rock & Roll, the Bundy household becomes a hot spot for Elvis Presley fanatics to visit.
Season 3, Episode 3: Poke High27 November 1988
A young football player, named Matt, from Polk High where Kelly and Bud go to school is threatening two Bundy records. One held by Al for the most touchdowns in one season, and the other by Kelly for refusing her advances. So, Kelly resorts to becoming a cheerleader for Polk High's team in order to catch Matt's attention during a big season ending game.
11 December 1988
The Rhoades and the Bundys head out to the Rhoades cabin in the woods, but the merriment is halted by Kely's PMS. The men leave for a bit to go out fishing, and return to all three women menstruating and hostile. When a bear attacks the car, Al hilariously attempts to stop him.
8 January 1989
Al decides to build a spare bathroom when the upstairs toilet floods one too many times.
15 January 1989
Al must go to a far-off lingerie outlet store to buy a discontinued brassiere for Peggy.
29 January 1989
Desperate Al and Steve put their heads together seeking solutions to impending baldness when Steve begins to notice his receding hairline, whereas Al doesn't care at all. After unsuccessfully trying some hair tonic for themselves, Steve tries joining a club for bald men called Bald American Dudes (BAD) and brings Al along with him who holds their latest meeting at the shoe store.
5 February 1989
After a birthday party fortune teller predicts luck for everyone else but doom for Marcy, she insists the Bundys fly with her on her business trip where she confronts her rude boss.
12 February 1989
After the death of his longtime barber, Al lets his hair down rather than tolerate a visit to a stylist or a salon... staffed by women. When Al backs down and goes to a salon, he gets a really bad hairstyle that makes him look like a woman.
In the infamous 'lost episode', Al and Peg learn they have been video taped getting intimate at a sleazy motel. The same thing has also happened to Steve and Marcy. They decide to take the matter to court.
Season 3, Episode 11: Eatin' Out19 February 1989
The Bundy's go out to a fancy restaurant to spend a great windfall, an inheritance check for $237 from a late uncle of Peggy's. But it becomes apparent that the fine dinning in public is not a part of the dysfunctional Bundy lifestyle, which makes matters worse when Al forgets to bring the check.
26 February 1989
Kelly invites Peggy to her school as part of a presentation for career day.
18 March 1989
After Kelly gets in trouble at school, the only way she can get out of punishment if she joins a tap dance class.
2 April 1989
Al finally convinces Peggy to contribute to the household income but feels emasculated when Peggy starts bringing home huge "commish" checks from her cosmetics sales job, earning more money than Al, himself. Even Al's new part-time job as a crew member at Burger Trek can't put him back in the lead as family breadwinner. Things go from bad to worse when Al finds the book containing the names of Peggy's customers.
25 March 1989
While driving Peggy back from the video store, Steve gets cut off in traffic and Peggy gives the driver "the finger." Steve then asks the Bundys to come over at his and Marcy's house to watch some videos as protection when he's afraid of a violent reprisal when he is followed home by the man. When there's a knock on the front door, Al convinces Steve to take the first punch... and Steve ends up knocking down a midget.
9 April 1989
After asking the Bundys to watch their house for the day, Marcy and Steve return to find a big hole where their house once stood. It seems that Peggy had earlier that day mistakenly told a wrecking crew looking to demolish Steve's Road House and she directed them to Steve 'Rhoades' house instead. So the Rhoades are forced to spend the night at the Bundy house. Meanwhile, Kelly throws a slumber party for four of her girlfriends, but Bud ends up disrupting it and turns it into a "cat-fight" riot.
23 April 1989
Peggy spends $2,800 of Al's hard earned money ($2,000 on phone bills, $500 on a new dress, and $300 on makeup) when she decides to attend hers and Al's high school reunion dance at Polk High, where Peggy makes a desperate effort to get herself elected prom queen. But she may be outdone by her old rival, Connie Bender. Also, Connie's husband, Jack, an old rival of Al's, eyes a possible fistfight they never had in school.
30 April 1989
Peggy stands to lose the crown to Connie, until Al finally decides to stand up to Connie's husband Jack. Meanwhile, Bud and Kelly crash the party to pig out on some real food since they are never fed at home, where Peggy takes advantage of the fight between Al and Jack outside to get the kids help in rigging the election.
7 May 1989
After his two best friends find dates for themselves, Bud is desperately seeking Susan, or any girl that will date him. So, Bud resorts to getting a life-size mannequin to pose as his date for the evening. Meanwhile, Al comes up with a million dollar invention for a shoe salesmen's convention that looks desperate, called "Shoe Lights"; he takes the headlights and battery out of the car and straps them on Kelly's shoes.
14 May 1989
The Bundys buy a computer, which serves no purpose other than a hat rack. But what nobody knows is that the computer can talk. But only to Al.
21 May 1989
The Bundys spend a day at the beach.
27 August 1989
When a serial peeper is on the loose, Al makes the ultimate sacrifice to alleviate Peggy's despair about being the only one not fall victim. Bud must tutor Kelly so she can pass to the next grade, unfortunately in order to make room, new information pushes out old basic knowledge.
3 September 1989
On Labor Day, the gender roles are reversed when Al becomes the loafing one while he forces Peggy to prepare the backyard barbecue for his creation of the famous "Bundy Burgers." But one of the secret ingredients to them are the ashes of Marcy's dead aunt which was stolen by Kelly from the Rhodes house.
10 September 1989
A TV aerobics instructor tries to get the Bundys in shape, but instead he becomes sedentary and dies of a heart attack after eating junk food.
24 September 1989
Kelly and Bud need to raise money for concert tickets for themselves, so Bud sells Al as a camping guide, and Kelly cheats at a poker game with Peggy's friends. With Steve and Bud along for the ride, Al has to take a bunch of kids camping and they end up stranded in the woods and only Buck can save them.
1 October 1989
A toothache forces Al to see Marcy's dentist, a divorced man that devotes as much of his time to his work as he does to his young female dental assistant, who's ironically named T.C. At the same time, Al pressers Peggy to cook a square meal for him for just one day.
8 October 1989
Peggy begins to suspect that Al is cheating because he seems to have a lot of different excuses on why he is coming home later than usual. Peggy meets Ginger at her beauty salon. Ginger is a young woman who admits she is sleeping around with another woman's husband and Peggy thinks it could be Al that she is sleeping with. Marcy goes to Peggy's salon and gets a new look, that Steve hates. Peggy is worried that Al is cheating on her and she is determined to get answers.
29 October 1989
The Bundys' latest money making scam is to host a foreign exchange student in their garage. But the French beauty proves to be so popular that she ends up stealing all of Kelly's boyfriends.
5 November 1989
When a Playboy playmate walks into Al's shoe store, he's eager to get home and look up her October 1987 issue. But Al is a broken man when he finds out that Peggy has sold his entire Playboy collection to get money to buy a good luck charm to win the lottery. The ghost of Al's father later appears and convinces him to get some self-respect.
Season 4, Episode 8: 976-SHOE12 November 1989
Al decides to open a shoe emergency hot-line with help from Steve in the form of a $50,000 loan. But typically, Al's get-rich-quick scheme backfires when nobody phones in. When Marcy gives Al a second $50,000 loan to repay the original loan, the Bundys and the Rhoades join together in a downward spiral of failure when Al instead sinks the second $50,000 into his failing shoe hot-line, which results in Steve losing his job at the bank, Marcy getting demoted, and Al ending up being the loser as always.
19 November 1989
When the Dodge finally gives its death rattle, Al digs up his secret car-fund shoe box and trades the Dodge for a ride to the local dealership. When Bud opens the shoe box, he finds not $5,000, but a mere $800... and a red hair. Al spends the rest of the episode trying to buy something that goes "vroom!"
Season 4, Episode 10: At the Zoo26 November 1989
Newly unemployed Steve decides he doesn't really want to work, so he fritters away his days with the Bundys, visiting zoos and taking fishing trips. The strain this puts on Steve's relationship with Marcy who ends up going out with Al to a local bar where they swap stories about their failing marriages. But the conversation between Al and Marcy reaches its peak when Marcy has to decide whether to use the $25,000 reward she earned by foiling a bank robbery, sustaining a gunshot wound in the process, to buy a new car or to bail out Steve, who has been arrested for "rescuing" Bosco the tortoise from the local zoo.
17 December 1989
Al has finally saved up a lot of cash to buy his family a ton of presents they want this year. Unfortunately, a mob of late customers in the shoe store prevents him from getting to the bank and retrieving the money he needs.
17 December 1989
His guardian angel decides pay Al a visit and shows him what life is like without him born. The Jablonskys are a perfect family and The Rhoades are more like the Bundys except without Al.
7 January 1990
Al desperately tries to fix the house's leaking roof during the weekend of a long rainstorm. But each time Al falls off the roof, it makes Peggy and the kids wonder if he's too stupid or too cheap to call a roofer to do the job. Meanwhile, Steve lands another job at a pet store in which Marcy suffers side affects after getting bitten by a venomous guinea pig.
14 January 1990
Al is faced with an IRS audit because of Peg. He decides to find money quick to pay of his taxes by selling Peg's hair for $5,000. However Peg is not looking to give away her red anytime soon.
4 February 1990
When Al challenges the selfish and ungrateful family members to earn a dollar of their own, Peggy tries scamming money from others because of her loath for working. Meanwhile, Bud appoints himself as Kelly's agent a lands her a job as a 'rock video slut'.
11 February 1990
After Steve abandons Marcy, Peggy decides to make her feel better by going to Las Vegas with Al's money.
18 February 1990
With Al and the kids discovering that Peggy took all the money, they go to Vegas where both Peggy and Marcy are broke and need a way to come up with money.
25 February 1990
Al is all excited when he's asked to speak at his high school reunion dance at Polk High. At the dance, while Al rambles on and on about the unhappily married man, Peggy finds herself being wooed by a teacher, Kelly trying to please two dates, and Bud plotting revenge against his date, Heather McCoy, who humiliated him years earlier by running his underwear up a flagpole.
25 March 1990
Al tries to ditch Peggy on her birthday until she catches him in the act and tags along with the family.
15 April 1990
Peggy tries to earn her G.E.D. with Kelly in night school.
Season 4, Episode 21: Rain Girl29 April 1990
Kelly chooses to be a weather girl rather than go to school which makes the Bundy's happy since she'll be making more money than Al.
6 May 1990
After being plagued by nightmares of feet a beautiful woman asks Al to judge a contest at Gary's, whose contestants she, "could never compete with." Meanwhile Kelly tricks Marcy and Bud into thinking they've slept together.
Season 4, Episode 23: Yard Sale13 May 1990
Peggy will buy anything at a yard sale, so when she brings home a boar's head, there's no more room in the garage to put it. So, Al decides enough is enough and he decides to have his own yard sale, despite Peggy's protests. But the stuff he is selling is stuff only Peggy would be stupid enough to buy. Al's next idea is to create "Bundyland, the happiest place on Earth," which is a collection of all the junk items Peggy bought in their own back yard.
23 September 1990
The Bundys decide to go for a drive--on Labor Day. They spend the better part of the holiday sitting in traffic, arguing with one another, and picking fights with neighboring motorists.
30 September 1990
Al and Kelly feign illness to avoid going to Wanker County with Peg and Bud. Al looks forward to his quiet and peaceful weekend, until Kelly gets sick.
7 October 1990
Bud's new driver's license portends bumper cars on the roadway. When bud t-bones a Mercedes, Al sees an opportunity to clean up in court. At least he has hope. Losing his lawsuit hurt but what he goes through to payoff the settlement is truly painful.
14 October 1990
Al is cut from the neighborhood softball team just before the big game. When his all-star replacement is knocked out in the last inning, however, his team and family have to come crawling back.
Season 5, Episode 5: Dance Show21 October 1990
Peggy goes out dancing with Marcy, and becomes taken with a handsome man-about-town named Andy. At home, however, Al gets confronted by Andy's wife, Pete.
28 October 1990
Now an aspiring model, Kelly invents a maneuver called "The Bundy Bounce" for her first audition as spokesperson for the new Allente car. But Bud's big mouth gives the idea to another model, so Kelly must take things into her own hands and remove the competition. Meanwhile, Peggy goes on a strike with housework because Al think's she's useless.
4 November 1990
After Al returns home from work with a bump on the head, he sees (or thinks he sees) six little green aliens coming down to Earth and stealing his smelly socks to use as fuel for their spaceships. The only problem is no one sees them but Al, so everyone think's he's crazy when he tells others that he saw them.
11 November 1990
Al decides to grow a vegetable garden, but soon faces off against an all-out war with a rabbit who steals his carrots and other vegetables.
18 November 1990
When Al moves a sofa off a neighbor's lawn without a shirt on, he unexpectedly gains a reputation as a "stud" among the neighborhood women. Uplifted, he starts taking showers and wearing elegant clothes, and his performance at work improves dramatically, as does his popularity with the ladies. Needless to say, Peggy is both jealous and unsettled - her husband is acting very unlike-Al.
25 November 1990
Tired of Al escorting her dates out through the doorway, "grown-up" Kelly gets her own apartment.
16 December 1990
After Al's bachelor uncle dies, he leaves $500,000 to the first of his relatives to produce a newborn baby named after him. Al overcomes his usual aversion to sex with Peg. Unknown to him, she is secretly staying on the pill, to keep Al wanting sex with her, and having decided that no amount of money is worth going through pregnancy a third time.
6 January 1991
After a drinking binge at a bankers party, Marcy reveals herself to be married to a mysterious hunk named Jefferson D'Arcy, whom Al finds out to be a gigolo and con artist. To make Marcy feel better to this unexpected change in her life, Peggy decides to throw a formal wedding ceremony for Marcy and Jefferson in the Bundy's back yard, in which nothing goes a planned.
3 February 1991
Al becomes the boss of the neighborhood after Kelly starts dating an influential city councilman.
10 February 1991
Told from the point of view of Buck, he runs away from the house feeling neglected. Behind a diner, he picks up a female dog, whom he brings home. He quickly regrets it, as the new dog gets all the attention from Bud and Kelly. Meanwhile, Al is obsessed with getting a taste of his favorite cherry cheesecake from a restaurant in Wisconsin.
17 February 1991
Peg takes an interior design course and her first assignment is to redecorate one room in her house. Unfortunately for Al, she chooses his spare bathroom.
24 February 1991
When a second floor aerobics studio, full of terribly overweight women, collapses into the shoe store, Al is laid off while the store is being repaired. Al then gets a night job as a security guard at his old high school, Polk High. This prompts his former high school rival, Spare Tire Dixon, to steal his prized trophy which leads to a brutal showdown.
17 March 1991
Al is haunted by a tune on the radio he can hum but not name, and he gets no help from Peggy or the D'Arcy's. Al similarly haunts Kelly's new boyfriend, Vinnie Verducci, the son of his fellow lowlife friend, Charlie Verducci, when Al warns Vinnie to only look and not touch, which is not easy for Vinnie.
24 March 1991
Al forgoes giving money to Bud for a class trip to Washington DC in order to give to Kelly who's going to an audition for the Miss Weenie Tot spokesperson. When Kelly lands the spot, Al gets a year's supply of his favorite mock food: Weenie Tots. But since uncooked tots rapidly disintegrate upon contact with the air, Peggy manages to spoil every single box while searching for a winning lottery ticket. When Al discovers that he's not eligible for the lottery money since Kelly is now an employee of the Weenie Tot Company, he asks Marcy and Jefferson to accept the money for him.
31 March 1991
Al and Peggy go over to watch a video at Marcy and Jefferson's house and proceed to take over the place. Meanwhile, Bud and Kelly seek gainful jobs for themselves, but only Bud gains with his first girlfriend, while Kelly babysits a family of seven kids from Hell.
7 April 1991
Al Bundy's childhood pal, Charlie Verducci, and the guy's dumb son Vinnie, attend a high society fund raiser in this pilot for the short-lived TV series, 'Top of the Heap.'
14 April 1991
Al cannot afford to buy an air conditioner for the hot summer. After an attempt to install an old experimental model, (which results in a neighborhood blackout) Al moves his family into the local supermarket. After a while, they are told by the manager to buy something otherwise they will be sent to the county jail. Al decides to purchase a stick of gum and as he approaches the checkout line, sees Marcy. He decides to cut in front of Marcy and becomes the one millionth customer winning a shopping spree worth $1,000.
21 April 1991
The Bundys and Darcys shop 'til they drop to see who will win $1000 in groceries. Needless to say, Marquis of Queensbury rules will not apply.
28 April 1991
While on their way to Los Angeles for a "Shoe Convention," the Bundy's car breaks down in the small town of Lucifer, New Mexico where they meet an old prospector who gives them a map to an old gold mine in the area in exchange for their car. They phone Marcy and Jefferson who come to the rescue, thinking that the kids are dying. But it turns out that Al and Peggy want their money for the mine deal. Then the six of them go off in search for the gold...
5 May 1991
Al, Peggy, Kelly, Bud, Jefferson, and Marcy find the gold mine in the desert. Al discovers the first gold nugget and everyone but the feeble-minded Kelly winds up with a bag full of gold. Al and Peggy have two separate fantasies of how to spend it. But after three days of digging, it's revealed that they're stuck in a tourist attraction seeded with fools gold for the tourists to find. The Bundys and D'Arcys aren't pleased with this turn of events, until they notice the gold watches, rings, and earrings the tourists are wearing...
19 May 1991
A man offers the Bundy's $10,000 if Buck will breed with his champion dog, Lady Bird. So, Al has to coach Buck into knowing the varieties of breeding with other dogs the proper way. But needless to say it goes wrong and Al is stuck with the bill. Meanwhile, Kelly becomes Bud's fashion counselor and dresses him up in medieval costumes.
8 September 1991
Marcy and Jefferson announce that they are expecting a baby, sending Al into pearls of laughter saying that it's the end of Jefferson's life, until Peggy announces the same. Al begins to lose his hair at an accelerated rate, thinking it's the end of the world for him. Kelly and Bud aren't pleased with the news either and take it out on Al.
15 September 1991
Peggy and Marcy's constant demands for belly rubbing and expensive baby accessories drive Al crazy, prompting him to make a run for it. He and Jefferson end up at a bar connected to the bus station and watch semi-nude dancing girls while talking about a new and better life without their wives.
22 September 1991
When Al unearths his father's old hammer, he decides to turn the garage into his own private room to escape his pregnant wife. All goes well, until Jefferson and the guys crash in. Even worse, it's only a matter of time before their own pregnant spouses find out.
29 September 1991
Kelly earns a quick $1,000 at hustling pool to buy a gown for the local Miss Cheese competition, and a suspicious Al is out for blood, mistakenly thinking that Kelly is into prostitution. Al is then is out of blood when he sells his to get Kelly and manager Jefferson the money for a major pool game bet.
6 October 1991
While Peggy is away helping Marcy recover her precious childhood belongings that Jefferson abandoned in a storage locker to be auctioned off in which he pocked and gambled away the money, Al, Kelly, and Bud hold an anti-baby meeting and makes plans for a new "Bundy World Order" that includes food, clean clothes and a huge hooter-ed oriental maid to replace the "pegzilla" Peggy.
13 October 1991
While Jefferson suffers through a sympathetic pregnancy, Peggy is upset that Al is immune. Even worse Buck is listless and getting all the attention due Peggy.
27 October 1991
After barely avoiding a few minor accidents, Bud and Kelly finally convince Al to get some glasses. Will he cave in to his kids' request or keep insisting his vision is perfect?
6 November 1991
After Al falls out of his bedroom window and passes out, he claims he saw God's shoes. He decides to make and sell these shoes in order to make it big. Jefferson wants to join in and invests in Al's project with Marcy's money.
10 November 1991
Al finally gets cable TV installed in the Bundy household, but he cannot find anything good to watch. All that changes when Kelly, gibed out of an appearance on a public access TV by her modeling school teacher, gets her own talk show on the air with just $35 from her girlfriends. "Vital Social Issues N' Stuff With Kelly," features an all girl band and some of her friends discussing subjects such as "mens butts" and "the slut of the week."
17 November 1991
Al, Kelly, and Bud travel to Hollywood after Kelly's talk show becomes a hit with the TV networks in which Al tries to get into show business with his lame TV show ideas, Bud tries to score with some of the actresses, and Kelly is happy to be a star.
24 November 1991
Al dreams he's a detective on the verge of a big case.
1 December 1991
Peggy sends Bud and Kelly to spy on Al at the shoe store for the day to confirm her suspicion that Al's recent giddiness is the work of an extramarital affair rather than Al's claim that he's only been flirting with a "shoe groupie" at the shoe store.
22 December 1991
Al tries to retrieve his game ball from a former girlfriend after he takes stock of his life and finds he has nothing.
5 January 1992
As Grandmaster B, Bud does his coolest best while all over a girl who takes him out to non-traditional Bundy things such as rafting and sky diving. Meanwhile, Al and Peggy invite Marcy and Jefferson over to play a new board game called "Ethical Dilemma."
19 January 1992
Al is asked to appear in an athletic shoe commercial. Al, being Polk High's 1966 all city running back and shoe salesman is glad to reclaim his glory days. But Al ends up being a punching bag by Ed "Too Tall" Jones, Steve Carlton and Sugar Ray Leonard for the commercial.
9 February 1992
It's Bud's 18th birthday, but everyone still treats him like a little boy. Does he stay at home for his birthday party with a pony and a clown or does Al have something else in mind for his "adult" son?
16 February 1992
Steve returns to try and reclaim his estranged wife unaware that she has remarried to a younger man.
23 February 1992
It's Al and Peggy's 20th wedding anniversary, but Peggy only wants one thing from Al....S-E-X. Meanwhile, Kelly and Bud win the "My Dinner With Anthrax" contest which means a house party for the trash metal band. But there will be no party unless they can get rid of mom and dad first. The answer? Tricking them into taking a Florida vacation that turns out to be a time share sales scam where the salesman won't leave them alone. Back home, the house party gets dull with no food in the house and 10 feet of snow outside.
1 March 1992
Al is a broken man after the Bundys can no longer afford to buy a weekly TV Guide. When Jefferson arrives at their house with a fistful of cash, Al discovers that he has been running a psychic phone scam called "Madame Zelda." To keep him quiet about his scam, Jefferson decides to let Al in on the deal. But Al soon takes over the whole operation and the rest of the family joins in. When Al decides to unite the five psychic bosses of Chicago, he insults the feared Madame Inga, who decides to throw a curse on the Bundys.
Season 6, Episode 20: High I.Q.22 March 1992
An invitation to join the high intelligence Alpha club, is issued to Kelly and not Bud. When they discover the real reason behind the gathering, Kelly and Bud decide to handle things with the usual Bundy charm (and violence). Meanwhile, Al buys a new "Handyman's Workbench 5000" that has some assembly required. This challenge requires the combined skills of Al and Jefferson while Peggy and Marcy watch and enjoy the show by taking pictures and counting the number of times the men injure themselves.
5 April 1992
Bud's belief that his 40-year-old teacher is romantic interested in him is greeted by laughter from everyone. But another student smells the smoke and wants the fire for herself. Meanwhile, Peggy has a cold which prompts Al to keep his distance by going out every night to a Chuck-E-Cheese restaurant for some free pizza by crashing little kids birthdays parties. Can Bud keep two girls or will he suffer from a humiliating Bundy defeat?
19 April 1992
When Kelly's modeling school suddenly closes down, she gets a new job as a greeter at the TV World theme park. When this is threatened by her low performance ratings, Kelly gets switched into Commercial Land where she plays "the Verminator" who hunts down roaches, like Bud. Meanwhile, Al takes his annual "Bundy World Tour,": a week-long trip around the world by himself, in the Bundy living room.
26 April 1992
When Al can't pay his bill at the gas station, he is forced to don a uniform, complete with 'Habib' name tag and work at the station. He spends the day being hounded by motorists, as well as Peg and the kids.
3 May 1992
Lower Uncton, England 1653-- Seamus McBundy makes the mistake of insulting a witch who casts an evil spell upon the land, shading the town in darkness forever--as long as a male Bundy lives. In present day, 1992 Lower Uncton, still in darkness, the townspeople have successfully killed all male Bundy descendants of Shamus McBundy, except for Al and Bud. The head of the historical society, Winston, and his cohort Igor, conspire to lure the Bundys to England and dispose of them, ending the curse. But getting them to Lower Uncton would be easier said than done.
10 May 1992
The Bundys delight in their comped trip to England, spending here, spending there. All the while, the town of Upper Uncton conspires to kill the Bundys outside Lower Uncton, so the curse will remain and Upper Uncton can still rake in profits as a tourist town: the town beside the town in darkness. Finally, Winston and Igor bring the Bundys to Lower Uncton. The execution was imminent. Al and Bud would meet certain doom. Their only hope (unfortunately) was Kelly.
17 May 1992
The Bundys are cornered by both towns. Upper Uncton wants them dead so they can continue to profit as a tourist trap while Lower Uncton wants them dead so they can end the curse. Al moves to defend himself and soon finds himself in a medieval joust opposite Igor. Who will emerge triumphant? And will the curse ever be lifted? The fate of all rests in the hands of the lowly shoe salesman from America.
13 September 1992
The Bundys have another mouth to feed when Peggy's cousin Zemus and his wife, Ida Mae, pay a quick visit and leave behind their six year-old son Seven, who's captivating to Peggy (and only Peggy). She sees this as her chance to be a "great mother," or at least try.
20 September 1992
Seven gets some. Bud gets some, never mind she has measles. Al and Peggy get some because it's quicker than talking. Only Kelly doesn't get some but that's by choice because the guy is a jerk. And then he disrespects Kelly so she disrespects his face with her fist.
27 September 1992
When Peggy discovers that no one knows Seven's birthday, she picks one at random, Al's. He is understandably not pleased when he has lost his birthday to the new kid. Peggy decides to have a small party for Seven's 6th birthday at a local park. But the party fizzles when a snobbish rich parent arrives and declares the park private for his own son's party.
4 October 1992
When Peggy uses up the monthly mortgage to pay Seven's doctor bill, Al is forced to take a second job bar-tending at a topless bar, but its a male strip club where the bartender and all other men are topless. Al enjoys his job, but when Jefferson covers for Al for one day, he takes Al's job. Meanwhile, Peggy starts banning Kelly and Bud from the house to protect Seven from their germs.
11 October 1992
The way to a man's heart may be through his stomach, but it's not the heart that's sought by Peggy who's tired of being ignored by Al in the bedroom. So she tries a variety of exciting new outfits in an attempt to whet the appetite of a starving Al. But the only thing Al wants is a cooked steak for dinner.
25 October 1992
To meet girls, Bud starts his own community college fraternity, "Alpha Gunna Get em," with the only members being Hindu convenience store clerk Achmed, geek Francis, and retiree Gus. But the premier toga party, (in the Bundy garage) lacks fun and women.
1 November 1992
On Election Day, all of the Bundys (minus Seven) hit the voting booths, united to defeat political correctness and a new two cent beer tax. When their causes lose at the polls, the Bundys hit the streets for some good old-fashioned pillaging.
8 November 1992
Al decides that another Bundy must get a job and the ax falls on Kelly. This breaks Peggy's heart since no Wanker woman has ever worked before. After taking a job at a grease spoon diner, Kelly must experience the wonderful world of waitressing prior to her true calling as Kelly Bundy: Philosopher/Waitress.
15 November 1992
When his paycheck is taken by bill collectors, Al decides to do something with his non-life: he enters a shoe selling contest and wins. The prize is a first class ticket to Hawaii which the family turns into four stand-by's. After dumping Seven off with the D'Arcys, the Bundys travel to Chicago's O'Hare Airport where in an surprising twist, Al masquerades as an aging 1960s rock star, named 'Axel Bundy' from the group 'Shoes and Socks' in which they hob-nob into the first class lounge with six famous musicians, Richie Havens, Spencer Davis, John Sebastian, Robby Krieger, Peter Noone, and Mark Lindsay.
22 November 1992
When Al's favorite movie character dies, Al buys the plot next to him for his own eternal home. But Peggy wants to be buried next to Al and will do anything to spend her life after death with him.
13 December 1992
Thanks to a college grant of $25,000, Bud is ready to leave home and start the good life at college, until Al and Peggy discover the money. Being the selfish petty criminals they are, they grant the money for themselves, and go on a wild spending spree in just one day that leaves Bud with zero.
Season 7, Episode 12: Christmas20 December 1992
In the company of his peers at a bar with other Santas, mall Santa Al recalls Christmases past when he managed to avoid getting gifts to Peggy, Kelly, and Bud by turning them against each other (shown in a pseudo flashback to 1974). But this year the family shows a united front when they give Al his present, the jobs he has to work to get the money he needs to buy presents for Peggy and the kids. One job for Al is playing Santa Claus at the mall where Marcy and Jefferson get another opportunity to taunt and browbeat Al.
10 January 1993
The Bundys are going to a family wedding for Al's cousin. But Peggy can't decide what to wear, so while she dresses (and redresses) Al waits and daydreams. Meanwhile, Kelly color coordinates with two fellow bridesmaids, deciding that tight black leather is always best, and Bud gets to know the young bride to be much better than he should!
24 January 1993
It's no vacation for Al when Peggy and Marcy join him on his winter fishing trip and make him referee to their constant bickering. Meanwhile, Kelly, Bud and Seven, left behind with no food or money, help Jefferson spend all of Marcy's money.
7 February 1993
Working at the diner is getting to Kelly, so she decides to rebel by getting a motorcycle which Peggy deems as too dangerous, until Peggy tries it for herself and gets some good vibrations. But it's Al who really takes to the new bike and imagines himself as an "easy rider,"... at least until an untimely head-on meeting with the Dodge.
14 February 1993
Peggy decides to take up a hobby by drawing Al and in so doing, creates her own magazine cartoon of Al makes him famous: the hapless shoe salesman titled "Mr. Empty Pants". Al would prefer the fame to be fleeting, until another magazine (Playgirl) declares him to be a sex symbol.
21 February 1993
After one too many dateless Saturdays, Bud appears on a new TV dating game show called "You Can't Miss" for the less experienced, but not quite with the expected results. Meanwhile, the low IQ Kelly believes that there's a conspiracy to keep her from knowing what day it is.
28 February 1993
Peggy narrates her own pirate fantasy to Seven as a bedtime story. In the story, Peggy plays Princess Scarlett. Al is Captain Courage, her pirate captor and Jefferson is Prince Paco, her savior. Rounding out the cast is Bud playing the hunchback first mate Fluvio; Kelly as the dim-witted ship's navigator; Marcy playing the cabin boy/girl; and in a surprise appearance, Marcy's ex-husband Steve Rhoades playing the villainous Rubio the Cruel, who's feared for his terrible singing of show tunes.
14 March 1993
After Al passes for a senior citizen to get into the movies cheap he worries that he's getting old. He then starts acting old but a senior decathlon brings him back to life.
28 March 1993
After Al knocks out and captures a burglar that breaks into his house one night while he's sleeping on the couch after an argument with Peggy, he becomes a neighborhood hero. But the tables soon turn when the burglar sues Al for injuring him and the Bundys must go to court once again.
Season 7, Episode 21: Movie Show11 April 1993
After Kelly's boyfriend dumps her, Al and the family treat her to the movies where each member has a different agenda.
25 April 1993
Al's poor bedroom performance makes him the laughingstock of the entire town after another night with Peggy, even though the only person she tells about it is Marcy. Al then decides to get in shape for the real deal to get his self-confidence back.
2 May 1993
Al takes a $12,000 offer for early retirement from the shoe store, but Peggy finds the money and spends all of it in one hour by shopping. Al is forced to go back to work where he hears opportunity knocking with a chance to buy a shoe store called "Home Plate Athletic Shoes." Meanwhile, Charlene Tilton visits the Bundy house trying to sell them an "Abdomenizer."
9 May 1993
One morning, Al discovers that his Dodge has been stolen. At Jefferson's behest, Al decides to cheat the insurance company and enjoys renting a loaner Lincoln Town Car...Until the police find his beloved heap.
16 May 1993
Bud's cousin gets divorced after finding out that his wife did the deed with Bud just before their wedding. Or rather, he doesn't exactly know it was Bud, but he's determined to find out. As Bud waits for the hammer fist to fall he turns to Al, of all people, to discuss the morality of his actions.
23 May 1993
A rich hot babe from Al's past thinks Al is a disgusting pig. But she likes that in a man. So she offers to buy Al for half a million dollars.