Soul Man (1986)
Professor Banks: Mr. Watson, I am not a humorless man, but if you insist on taking up my class time making jokes, please see to it that they are funny.
Mark Watson: Mom! Dad! There's something I have to tell you... I'm black.
Mark Watson: She told me they have support for people whose parents are poor, but not for those whose parents are assholes.
Mark Watson: I got the money, Brad.
Brad Small: Oh? How?
Mark Watson: Where there's a will, there's a way...
Brad Small: Yeah? And what's your way?
Mark Watson: It's a SECRET way.
Gordon Bloomfeld: A secret way...
Brad Small: Well thats great Mark-o, but just in case your "secret way" falls through, feel free to look me up! Thanks for the cocktail Gordon...
Mark Watson: You didn't believe me, do ya? You don't believe me! Well the joke's on you sucker, because I'm going to Harvard and DON'T CALL ME A LIAR! That asshole thinks I'm lying!
Gordon Bloomfeld: Mark! You ARE lying...
Professor Banks: I understand you are allowed one phone call from jail?
Mark Watson: Yes.
Professor Banks: Next time you get arrested, use it to call me. I'll bring you your books. You can study in jail.
Professor Banks: Some of you may have had easy lives up until now. Some of you may not. Life this semester won't be *easy* for any of you. Your grades in your first year of law school can determine your entire future in the law.
Gordon Bloomfeld: Objection!
Professor Banks: To what?
Gordon Bloomfeld: Quite frankly, to your tone of voice.
Gordon Bloomfeld: A black Negro? He never told me he was a black Negro. Thank you. Boy, just when you think you get to know somebody. I'm gonna go confront him with this information right now. Wow... Mark... a black Negro!
Mark Watson: What's happening, brother? Get down, get down. Looking good, mamma, looking good. Well, I gots to be going now!
Professor Banks: You've learned something I can't teach them. You've learned what it feels like to be black.
Mark: No sir.
Professor Banks: Beg your pardon?
Mark: I don't really know what it feels like sir. If I didn't like it, I could always get out. It's not the same sir.
Professor Banks: You've learned a great deal more than I thought.
Mark Watson: With all due respect, sir, I just spent 18 hours locked in a jail cell, on no formal charges, getting pulverized by drunken bigots!
Professor Banks: If you've had some sort of accident, Mr Watson, perhaps you should have taken the entire day off.
Mark: Oh. I'm fine. I just got in sort of a fight. I mean, it wasn't my fault! You see they threw me in this cell with these real ass - - some extremely unsportsman-like fellows.