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Jake Speed (1986) Poster

(1986)

Quotes

Pop: There are a few, a very few men. Remo. Mack Bolan. Jake Speed. In this case, I think Jake Speed's the man for the job.

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Pop: They defeat evil where it exists, pinhead!

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Wendy: Maybe it's a blessing. At least your grandfather believes in somebody. Speedy Jake. Remero. Whatever. Who are our heroes?

Margaret Winston: Nobody.

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Desmond Floyd: Why doesn't she believe in us? We believe. That's why we win.

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Newsstand Attendant: [while helping customers] Sure he's real. Everybody knows that. In fact, I play cards with him every Thursday night. Me, Jake Speed, Batman - thanks - oh, Sherlock Holmes and, once in a while, Superman stops in.

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Jake Speed: If all this were about money, I'd be working for the wrong side most of the time.

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Jake Speed: I'm the last of the original nice guys!

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Margaret Winston: I didn't know you had that!

Jake Speed: That's why they call it a concealed weapon.

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Margaret Winston: So, where did you and Des meet?

Jake Speed: Volume One.

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Jake Speed: Sometimes you do things the hard way.

Margaret Winston: Why?

Jake Speed: Reads better.

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Margaret Winston: Who is Reno Mellon?

Jake Speed: We made it up!

Desmond Floyd: It's Jake's favorite town and my favorite breakfast food.

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Margaret Winston: What if you sold me to the wrong guys?

Jake Speed: That would make a piss-poor story, wouldn't it?

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Jake Speed: Oh yeah, we go way back. Back to Volume Two.

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Jake Speed: Come on, we need a big finish!

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Margaret Winston: If you're such a big deal, why haven't they ever made a movie?

Jake Speed: Ever try to deal with those people?

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Jake Speed: Heroes don't die.

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Sid: Being the good guy's so predictable. You do everything right!

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Sid: I'm the bad guy, Jake. I do anything I want.

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Sid: I take great pride into 'aving never lived up to anything!

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Maurice: This'll rot your caviar!

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Sid: You're a Boy Scout, Jake!

Jake Speed: REFRESHING! Isn't it?

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Jake Speed: Evil may triumph, Sid, but it'll never conquer.

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Jake Speed: If you want something bad enough, you get it!

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Jake Speed: We were gonna fight our way through enemy territory. Scale the highest mountain in this goddamned place. Traverse a bridge that was about to collapse. And then if we were lucky, I mean really lucky, we were gonna fight our way through two thousand extremely poisonous snakes.

Margaret Winston: There are thousands of snakes around here?

Jake Speed: There's gotta be if you look hard enough!

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Margaret Winston: Has it ever occurred to you that there might be an easier way?

Jake Speed: Yeah, so where's the entertainment value in that?

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Jake Speed: Why do you think bad things happen? So you have something good to look forward to! If everything was same-o, same-o, you'd die of boredom!

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Jake Speed: Don't worry. When you're right, nothing can happen to you.

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Wendy: Isn't that the guy your grandfather was talking about, the guy from the comic books?

Desmond Floyd: Paperback novels!

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Wendy: Even weirdos can read!

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Sid: Make sure Ali Baba gets his babes. I've got a reputation to protect.

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[Margaret is captured by the white slavers]

Sid: Yesss. You're a bit straight, but you've got potential.

Margaret Winston: You scum sucking pig!

Sid: How old are you, pussycat? How old!

Margaret Winston: Twenty-seven.

Sid: Sorry. This is a game for kids.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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