Memorable quotes for
Crocodile Dundee (1986) More at IMDbPro »

Sue Charlton: That croc was going to eat me alive.
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: Well, I wouldn't hold that against him. Same thought crossed my mind once or twice.

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Richard Mason: Take care now.
Sue Charlton: Don't worry. I'm a New Yorker!

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Neville Bell: Oh no, you can't take my photograph.
Sue Charlton: Oh, I'm sorry, you believe it will take your spirit away.
Neville Bell: No, you got lens-cap on it.

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Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: Of course it took me a week to crawl this far. I thought I was a goner. I said to meself, "Mick old son, find yourself a nice comfortable spot and lay down and die".
Sue Charlton: Weren't you afraid?
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: Of dying? Nah. I read The Bible once. You know God and Jesus and all them apostles? They were all fishermen, just like me. Yeah, straight to heaven for Mick Dundee. Yep, me and God, we'd be mates.
[they continue along the way followed by Mick after he had been attacked and injured by a crocodile]

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Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: For a minute there uh, "room-service" took on a whole new meaning.

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[Dundee is threatened by a mugger with a switchblade]
Sue Charlton: Mick, give him your wallet.
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: What for?
Sue Charlton: He's got a knife.
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: [chuckling] That's not a knife.
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: [Dundee draws a large Bowie knife]
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: *That's* a knife.
[Dundee slashes the teen mugger's jacket. He and his friends run away]
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: Just kids having fun. You alright?
Sue Charlton: I'm always all right when I'm with you Dundee.

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Richard Mason: New York City, Mr. Dundee. Home to seven million people.
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: That's incredible. Imagine seven million people all wanting to live together. Yeah, New York must be the friendliest place on earth.

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[Mick "Crocodile" Dundee singing in the bathtub]
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: If I give my heart to you...
[pause]
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: Then I'll have none and you'll have two...

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Sue Charlton: How does he find his way in the dark?
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: He "thinks" his way. A lot of people believe that they're telepathic.
[Sounds of branches breaking, splashing]
Neville Bell: OOOOh, God, I hate the bush.

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Neville Bell: [Mick has just snuck up on Nev and is holding his knife to Nev's throat] Ah, Mick! You frightened shit out of me!
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: So I oughta, mate. Sneaking up on a man when he's rendering first aid to a lady.
Neville Bell: Ah, is that what you were doing?

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Walter Reilly: [after the fight with the croc in the bar, Mick joins Sue and Wally] Sorry I that frightened you, miss. Uh, you see, it's stuffed!
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: [Mick indicates "Cyril"] Him an' me both, Wal. Michael J "Crocodile" Dundee.
Sue Charlton: [Sue shakes his hand] Never-Never Safaris.
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: Yeah, er, never go out with a s... If you do, you'll never come back. Right, Wal?
Walter Reilly: [giggles]

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Sue Charlton: [Sue and Mick are dancing] Legend has it a crocodile took half your leg off.
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: ...
[Mick rolls up his trousers]
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: More like a love bite really. Here ya are, enough about me leg. Let me tell you about the rest of me. "Up North in the Never-Never, where the land is harsh and bare, lives a mighty hunter named Mick Dundee
[points to himself]
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: who can dance like Fred Astaire".

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Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: [Sue and Mick are kissing at Echo Lake. Wally calls in the distance] Bloody Wally. He's only been here a dozen times. He's probably lost.

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Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: I don't mean to put down your black widow spider, but the funnelweb spider can kill a man in eight seconds, just by lookin' at him.

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Walter Reilly: Right, well, ah. 'Till Wednesday. Cheerio
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: Wednesday
[Walks off, pauses, turns back to Walter]
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: What's today, Wal?
Walter Reilly: Monday
[Mick walks away]
Walter Reilly: Doesn't know. Doesn't care. Heh! Lucky Bastard.

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Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: Well, you see, Aborigines don't own the land.They belong to it. It's like their mother. See those rocks? Been standing there for 600 million years. Still be there when you and I are gone. So arguing over who owns them is like two fleas arguing over who owns the dog they live on.

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Sue Charlton: Is it dead?
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: [looks at the crocodile with his knife in its skull] Well, if it isn't, it'll be a helluva job skinning the bastard.

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Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: [Mick brings stuffed croc up to the bar after making his grand entrance] Two beers, Ida. One for me, and one for me mate.
Ida: [laughing] One for your mate! Ya mad bugger!

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Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: [a guana is sizzling over a fire. Sue looks ill] How do you like your guana? Medium? Well done?
Sue Charlton: You don't really expect me to eat that?
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: Yeah, its great. Yeah, try some of these yams, try the grubs and the sugar ants. Just bite the end off, they're really sweet. Black fellas love 'em.
Sue Charlton: [tentatively tries a yam] What about you, aren't you having any?
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: Me?
[Mick starts working on a tin with his knife]
Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee: ...Well, you can live on it, but it taste like shit.

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