|Index||4 reviews in total|
To answer the last reviewer's question, YES Mad Max was that inspirational. This movie is a true piece of art, glorious and immortal. There were many great post nuke films in the 80s (that I have spent a considerable amount of money obtaining them all) and this is by far the best one in this genre, one of the greatest movies of all time. It is a shame that this movie will probably never see a DVD release. I cannot recommend this movie and the 80s post nuke genre enough to you film freaks, some of the best movies ever made are in this genre. Since I cannot put links in this review, if you need to know where to obtain them email me and I'd be happy to help you out!
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
Warriors of the Apocalypse has everything you could possibly want in a post-apocalyptic action move; a band of unkempt guys in overly elaborate leather outfits, guns that will kill you even if the bullet strikes a tree four feet away, Polynesian warriors, immortal pygmies in King Diamond makeup, a village populated almost exclusively by women in fur bikinis, a telepathic jungle princess in jewels and high heels with a rocket launcher-equipped throne, a hydroelectric plant masquerading as a nuclear reactor operated by hideous, radiation scarred mutants, and a plot with absolutely no point whatsoever. Oh, and it's dull too.
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
After a nuclear war has decimated the planet, the few surviving inhabitants are forced to fend for themselves. As a result of these harsh circumstances a small group of men led by a man named "Trapper" (Michael James) wander the wastelands looting and killing whoever gets in their way. As it just so happens, while in the course of their wanderings they come upon another group of bandits and with the help of a stranger named "Anuk" (Chito Guerrero) manage to kill most of them and take what few supplies are available. Anuk then tells Trapper that he knows of a place where there is plenty of food and water for everybody. Upon hearing this the group eagerly follows Anuk as he leads them into the jungle where they encounter hostile savages, pygmies and mutants. Now, rather than reveal any more of the film and risk spoiling it for those who haven't seen it, I will just say that this was a low-budget movie which had a good plot but suffers greatly from bad acting, ridiculous action sequences, absurd costumes and extremely basic special effects. Even worse is the fact that the director (Bobby A. Suarez) had a bevy of attractive, scantily-clad women which he essentially chose to ignore so that he could focus on you guessed it bad acting, ridiculous action sequences, absurd costumes and extremely basic special effects. How sad.
What is it with me and these cheapo 80's movies that all revolve around
the apocalypse? I seem to pick up another one every time I venture out
to the market these days. Was Mad Max really that inspirational? Or is
it a case of lazy screenwriters not being able to impose their vision
on any other scenario than the end of the world? In any case, I'm glad
that 20 years on.. the genre is more or less absent from today's
culture, so let's try to keep it that way, shall we? A remake of this
or similarly themed films is something I definitely could not handle..
In this telling of the age-old tale, we have a bunch of survivors slowly trudging through the wasteland, barely scraping by on food and water. They each have their own specific label (A smart old guy, a cool dude with shades and a leader covered in body hair to show how manly he is) but mostly they are your usual stereotypical rabble of rednecks. They run into a bit of trouble when they are constantly under attack by a tribe of pygmies who seem to have the ability to rejuvenate whenever they are killed. After being captured by these little men, they find themselves as prisoners of a 175 year old princess and her duplicitous head priest. Fortunately, their jail is a treehouse village paradise populated by gorgeous amazon-like women who see them as future fathers of their children. Not surprisingly, they want to stay now. But is there a darker side to this utopia? What do you think?
I'm still suppressing the giggles from watching this video. Gun battles where people throw themselves in front of bullets, slow-motion fight scenes where people very obviously never make any contact, the hideous, repeatedly used special effect where light beams come out of someone's eyes (has to be seen to be believed), the customary fat girl used as comic relief because she can't get any action, the wobbling set that looks like it was assembled from old pantomime props.. I could go on. At least it is never a chore to sit through, there is always something unintentionally hilarious round the corner just when things seem to be getting dull. This doesn't mean it gets a good rating, but at least it would be a great choice for a MST3K night when you've had a few with your mates. I recommend it on that level alone. Filled with all the softcore nudity and cheesy dialogue you'd expect just by looking at the title, this 'not quite good enough to be a B movie' gets 2 out of 10.
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