EastEnders (1985– )
Dot: Luke, Chapter 4, Verse 23. Physician heal thyself.
Zoe: Zoe, Chapter 1, shut your cakehole
Dot: How rude...
Ian Beale: [after Minty asks him about advice on weddings] Yes I've had three wives. One cheated on me, one Didn't make it past reception, and one shot me. What would you like to know?
Alfie: You know what they say, darlin', the course of true love never runs smooth.
Kat: I don't want smooth, just something that's less like roller-blading down the Himalayas with a rocket up me backside.
Dr. Anthony Trueman: I want to be with Kat, Kat wants nothing to do with me. I don't want to be with Zoe, Zoe wants everything to do with me. Happy Christmas.
Alan: You don't wanna go upsetting the Mitchells, they have long memories.
Tony: Honestly, Si, you don't know whether you're Arthur or Martha!
Zoe: This ain't the Sound of Music, he's not going to marry you.
Frank Butcher: You're a wave short of an ocean, aint ya?
Frank Butcher: What do ya take me for? Some kind of ice cream?
Frank Butcher: What do you take me for? Some kind of Donut?
Frank Butcher: What do you take me for? Some kind of Pilchard?
Ethel Skinner: [referring to punk Mary] You know what the bible said, "Help thy neighbour".
Dot Cotton: But it didn't say, "Help thy common slut that won't help thyself."
Den Watts: [on seeing a miserable-looking Pauline] They cancelled public hangings or something?
Zoe: My sister is my mum. My Dad is my granddad and my uncle, and my uncle is my dad.
[When big Mo was 'Miss Whiplash', Little Mo answers the phone]
Little Mo: You've been a naughty boy?... What did you do?... Oh I'm sure you didn't mean to, you sound ever so sorry.
[Talking to Charlie about Kat]
Mo: She's got a loud mouth and a foul temper. I dunno where she gets it from.
Frank Butcher: I'll tell you what, pal, you talk to me like that again and you're gonna get a dry slap.
Dot: So they killed him then, because he didn't fit in?
Wake Guest: Dot, I'm not saying that.
Dot: Yes you are, you've said it very well. He was always a help to me. If you had no respect for him while he was alive, the least you can do is have respect for him now he's dead!