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|Index||40 reviews in total|
A "Star Wars"-style word scroll informs us that the nuclear war has
fought, leaving the Earth a post-apocalyptic wasteland, but the world we see
in the movie isn't very wastelandy at all, what with all the scenic country
roads and large office complexes. We meet "The Warrior" (Robert Ginty), a
completely average and fairly loathsome guy who crashes his "Supersonic
Speed Cycle" into a very obvious and easily avoidable wall. This convinces
some fey, robe-clad elderly types that he is some sort of chosen one, so
Fred "Hammer" Williamson and Persis "Star Trek" Kambata (with hair) enlist
him to help save her Jimmy Carter-like father from the vaguely evil Prossor
(enduring fav Donald Pleasance, great as always). What evil things Prossor
is up to are unclear, although they involve lots of Nazi-looking guards who
turn into dummies when they fall off of buildings. Plus he employs lots of
leather-clad S&M dancers who stretch and gyrate all over each other, which
doesn't seem very evil at all to me.
Anyhoo, despite his constant whining and lack of any discernible skills, The Warrior succeeds in saving Carter, only to leave Persis behind for no reason other than him being a total jerk. He and Carter go to a fight in the desert that looks like the one from the beginning of "Any Which Way You Can", save for the monkey pooping in squad cars. After fighting a bunch of random characters (ninjas, amazons, truckers, a lumberjack dwarf, a Divine look-a-like) he gets them all to unite to take on Prossor, who employs "Megaweapon" to demolish them. Megaweapon is a giant truck modified to spurt flames out it's front and- that's about it. It's really slow and clunky and easy to avoid, but it does manage to crush Warrior's incredibly annoying bike (which, I failed to mention, talks. In a Valley Girl voice. Ick.). Megaweapon easily out-acts the unintelligible Ginty.
Some other stuff happens and they rescue Persis, following which Mr. Warrior lays a big, wet, long, nauseating kiss on her, rubbing his livery lips and stubbly beard all over her entire face for several excruciating minutes. She seems to enjoy it, even though he's a twit who left her behind to die at Prossor's hands. Oh, and there's a plot twist that fails to make any sense or have any impact on the story, but at least they put forth the effort to have a twist.
I recommend this movie to any one who gets emotionally erect over explosions. There are lots of things blowing up, sometimes in luxurious slow motion. Sometimes we get to see the same explosion from many angles. It's pyro-porno.
Alright, here's how my experience with this movie went, my brother
bought a copy on VHS and we watched it. And I almost died of laughter.
Some people would say, "hey, if it's that pitifully funny, why not give
it a bad rating?" but the thing is, it was so ungodly entertaining,
that I couldn't give it possibly anything less than a nine, and the
fact that it has the best theme music ever, coupled with the run time
on the box being wrong, and another excellent performance by Donald
Pleaeance, it was just too good to be true.
So basically, go find this movie, I haven't seen the MST3k version, but would like to, it doesn't matter, all I know is that the original is a true wonder to behold.
It is physically impossible to comprehend the joy I felt in my heart
watching MegaWeapon crush that annoying talking motorcycle!
The main character sucked. Everyone but donald Pleasance also sucked. Still, it was worth more than a few laughs.
Elegantly, wonderfully, deliciously bad. The only way to truly appreciate this cinematic train wreck is to watch the MST3K version (less than a minute into the opening credits, Tom Servo asks, "Is it too late to kill myself?") Robert Ginty mumbles and grumbles his "dialog", Donald Pleasance reprises his many roles as the androgenous bad-ass, and a supporting cast of extras resembling Jimmy Carter, Saddam, Bluto, and Mimi keep things moving. One of the many films that makes an inexact science of ballistics -- no one with a gun can manage to even nick another character with a shot, even at point-blank range. Worth seeing, if only to watch in sadistic delight as "Megaweapon" runs over Einstein, the squeaky-voiced, talking motorcycle.
The only words I can sum up to attempt to describe this horrible Mad Max rip-off is "absolutely retarded". You see everything in this one from talking motorcycles to black Nazis. This is quite possibly the saddest attempt to entertain people using film that I have ever seen. Recommended for B-movie fans, although I'm not even sure that they would enjoy it. 1/10 for sure.
Somebody please explain this movie to me. What exactly was the plot again?
What was "the Warrior" saying during the whole thing? What was that battle
royal all about? If "the Warrior had just waited four seconds to pick up
Persis Khambatta in the helicopter, would there have been a point in
finishing the movie? Where did they find a black Nazi? What was the point
of Megaweapon, which really seemed pretty weak (Oooh! A
Save yourself. Run from this movie and don't look back. The only way to survive this horror is the MST3K version, but it still hurts.
I first saw this movie on MST3K, and it was my all time favorite. Even without the wiseass robots this is damn funny. I mean, from the stoner motorcycle, to Donald Pleasance as the blue print for Mike Myer's Dr. Evil character, to Robert Ginty's unbelievably wooden performance....oh man this is a great movie!!!! This and another Fred Williamson feature, Warriors of the Wasteland are the greatest of all the crappy Italian Mad Max knockoffs of the early to Mid 80s!
What do you get when you add Donald Pleasance, a cute girl, Jimmy Carter, and the Paperchase guy? A good movie, right? WRONG! You get an hour and a half of sleep. Although, there is a bright side to the film (surprised?): MegaWeapon!!! If you are a fan of MST3K than you'll love the riffs on this disasterpiece. "Frank, push the button."
MST3K had a great time riffing this. The movie is very good material,
and I think it's a real classic in it's genre(crappy low-budget
Nineteen Eightyfour motorcycle Mad-Max ripoffs).
The movie is a great example of "so bad it's good". We have a lot of ridiculous action, which is good, since many movies like these try to have some sort of "story" which just takes time and bores you to insanity. Warrior throws that crap out of the window and concentrates on what's important.
There is a computer, Einstein(credited as "itself"), who wins the "Most annoying computer of all time"-prize without even trying. Seriously, I'd take HAL before this one. There's Ginty, referred to as "Paper Chase Guy", who is the best mumbler ever to play hero, and best of all, there's MEGAWEAPON, a huge truck with flamethrowers and spikes.
This movie is awful. But unlike Mad Max, it doesn't try to take itself seriously. It's good fun and a good MST3K episode. Watch it!
The Paper Chase Guy along with his talking bike with graphics straight
Pong ride around in the apocalypse and meet the Bald Lady from Star Trek
Motion Picture! A bunch of stuff happens and the two end up saving the
Lady from Star Trek the Motion Picture's father, aka Jimmy Carter, from
bad guys dressed like Nazis. Whoops, while they may have saved Jimmy
Carter, the Bald Lady from Star Trek the Motion Picture got left behind!
Now she's being held captive by the evil Donald Plesence. A bunch of
stuff happens that isn't relevant at all to the plot. In the end The Bald
Lady from Star Trek the Motion Picture was saved and she and the Paper
Guy KISS in the most disgusting scene you have ever seen in your life!!
that damn bike with the Pong graphics came back to life
Ok, so this movie doesn't exactly have the greatest acting, special effects, or even a PLOT ... BUT if has one thing no other movie has! The one and only MEGAWEAPON!! It's worth it to sit through all the horrors of the movie just to see the glorious Megaweapon!!
Megaweapon is this magical being who attempted to destroy the Paper Chase Guy! Megaweapon even SQUISHED the evil bike with Pong graphics ... but recall how I mentioned it came back to life, hmph. Then the Paper Chase Guy had to go and destroy the wondrous Megaweapon! Oh the horror! Never fear, Megaweapon has the power of repairing himself!!! It's part of the magic that IS Megaweapon!!
Watch this movie for no reason other than Megaweapon, and laugh at all the scenes without Megaweapon.
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