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Hardbodies
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Reviews & Ratings for
Hardbodies More at IMDbPro »

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16 out of 17 people found the following review useful:

Whoa, long trip back!

Author: anonymous
6 April 1999

I remember watching this film when I was thirteen and just loving it: gorgeous naked women, gorgeous naked women, gorgeous naked women! Now my thoughts would be: 80s! 80s! 80s! AAAAGGGH! Okay, the 80s weren't so horrible, and I have fond memories of them, and this completely trashy teen sex flick (pretty much the quintessential movie of this quintessentially 80s genre) will zoom you back there so fast, you'll get whiplash and snap the flourescent strap on your sun glasses. Oh, the naked women are still gorgeous, but this thing never can have the same sort of fantastic appeal it did when you were 13 and afraid your parents would walk in the door while you and your buddies were watching it.

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19 out of 26 people found the following review useful:

Hardbodies 18th Anniversary

Author: (jimmy_james_86) from Downers Grove, Illinois
13 July 2002

Hardbodies, which was released in the summer of '84, came out around the same time as Ghostbusters and is similar with the latter in the respect that they are both classic films of their respective genres. This movie excels on so many different levels I don't even know where to begin. The performances of Grant Cramer as scammin'jammin' Scotty Palmer and Courtney Gains as his pothead buddy, Rag, are unforgettable. These actors bring such depth to their characters that at times the film seems to take on a documentary feel. "Are these actors, or are they real people just playing themselves," you may ask yourself while watching.

Their adventure begins when three middle-aged dorks turn to Scotty for advice on how to pick up the many beach babes which inhabit the SoCal location where the story takes place. He gives them the helpful advice of "dialoguing" the young girls with the promise that they will be offered the "B.B.D." (Bigger Better Deal). Many memorable characters are encountered along their journey of finding the ultimate piece of you-know-what in this already overpopulated area of hottys.

Who can forget Candy, the chick who "melts in your ear and not in your mouth". And Rag's ability to "flip people off in 48 languages". Hardbodies is also a standout in the category of "80's Party Movie" because it holds the distinction of being one of the few where just about every girl shown in the flick gets naked at least once. Let us all celebrate the 18th anniversary of "Hardbodies" by getting plenty of beer and picking up this brilliant masterpiece at the local blockbuster. A Cinematic triumph and a milestone in 80's cinema.

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9 out of 10 people found the following review useful:

Epitome of a good breast movie

7/10
Author: FFT5305 from Washington, DC
16 April 1999

Before sitting down to watch Hardbodies, decide what you are looking for out of this film. Do you want a well-written movie with an engaging plot, Oscar-worthy performances and beautifully-written dialogue? Then stay away from this movie. Do you want to see a fairly entertaining movie centered around fitting as much gratuitous shots of topless women as possible? Then you've found what you're looking for!

Hardbodies is a cheesy, 80's teen sex movie. But if you like cheesy, 80's teen sex movies, it's actually pretty good. It's better than any of the other ones out there. Some funny, quotable lines. A few entertaining characters. And many, many hot naked women. I mean, really -- how can you go wrong when there's bikini tops flying off before the opening credits even end?

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8 out of 9 people found the following review useful:

Hooray for Hardbodies-Bring Back The 80's

8/10
Author: OldAFSarge from Guam
17 February 2008

I first saw this movie when I was living on Guam in the mid-to-late-80's. I was cleaning out old VHS tapes when I ran across this one. Popped in the VCR and cleaned and watched at the same time. It was as fun a movie today, as it was nearly a quarter-century ago. Grant Cramer as Scotty Palmer has gone on to have an impressive resume and is still working in 2008. Sad to say that his girl from the movie, Kristi played by Teal Roberts did two movies in 1984 and played at stripper in Beverly Hills Cop II and a dancer in The Last Boy Scout and that was about it for her. I really thought at the time that she had a big future in movies as she was really an attractive woman and could act, at least in my opinion. Courtney Gains played Rac and went on to play Malachai in The Children Of The Corn and he is still going strong today. Again, I thought his girl in the movie, Kimberly, played by Cindy Silver, might just go on to have a decent career, but alas, she did two movies in 1984 and that was it. The movie, not to give anything away, is a mostly teen beach party type movie. Scotty is trying to help three older dudes learn to dialog the girls and in the end to get laid as well. Yes, there is some nudity, but it is not over-done in the least. For a fun look back this is a great movie for a rainy Saturday afternoon. Can't see the user rating of 3.8. It is worth every bit of a 7 at least.

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7 out of 8 people found the following review useful:

if you dont like it, you dont know what the 80's are!

10/10
Author: Matt (the_advenger@angelfire.com) from Vancouver, Canada
2 April 2001

This was a funny movie! true it was medicore acting, but hell that is what the 80's comedies were like. I laughed, i enjoyed the music, this is what it is about. oh yeah, i liked the hardbodies too! btw yes there was plenty of nudity, but heck such is life that is why it is rated R anyways, keep the kiddies out of the room and quit complaining!

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9 out of 12 people found the following review useful:

Last Of The Late Great Beach Movies!

10/10
Author: dgordon-1 from Toronto, Canada
29 August 2002

This movie has always been a strong favourite of mine. Everything from the California sunshine, to the funny storyline & characters is what gives this movie such a great appeal. Since the other reviewers have mentioned the plotline, I'm not going to mention it again. This movie has a nice flow to it which makes it an entertaining hour and thirty-minutes. I really liked this movie when it came out at the theatres in the summer of '84, and I still love it today, not only for the story but for the pure '80s nostalgia of it all. Five years before "California Dreaming" was released, but it didn't catch the same vibe that "Hardbodies" did, even though it was a good movie in it's own right. I bought a VHS copy of "Hardbodies" two years ago, and it's been a replayable & enjoyable addition to my library. I would really like to see this movie released on DVD someday.

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7 out of 9 people found the following review useful:

Very likable 80's sex comedy

6/10
Author: gridoon2016
20 January 2008

"Hardbodies" delivers what you should expect from a lightweight 80's sex comedy: plenty of fantastic-looking girls in bikinis or topless, a fun-carefree-sunny-summer-California-beach atmosphere, a couple of chuckles, and lots of 80's music. It does not deliver high cinematic artistry or a brilliant plot, but then again you should not expect any of that. The two main girls, Teal Roberts and Cindy Silver, are both enormously appealing and pleasantly natural, and the two main guys, Grant Cramer and Courtney Gains, are likable. The premise might have worked better if we had younger nerds in the roles of the middle-aged men, but to its credit the movie acknowledges their age and somehow manages to get away with it. It's the girls who are the most important here anyway, and as I said the casting was very good right down the line - I don't remember looking at even one less-than-pretty girl in this movie, even at the background. One of THE prettiest is no doubt a very young Kathleen Kinmont, in her first movie role: she doesn't get naked, yet her very tight white T-shirt leaves little to the imagination. (**1/2)

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9 out of 13 people found the following review useful:

What a story!

Author: hlw27 from Houston, TX
29 July 1999

Hey, at least this movie is what it is! A t & a classic. And, what a concept: 3 older bachelors hire a younger guy to party with them and train them on how to pick up younger women? C'mon, that's a beautiful script. Genius! All guys should rent it, especially to see the characters come clean in the end... Moral to the story: it is more important to just be yourself.

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5 out of 7 people found the following review useful:

The first great beach movie!

Author: BlackJack_B
5 June 2002

Back in the 60's, the Beach movie was a popular genre in the fluff-type of film that was prevalent then, but Frankie and Annette were not the ideal types that looked good in bathing suits (Linda Evans was, though). In the mid-90's, we finally had hunks and babes, but by then, drive-ins were out and these films could only be seen on VHS tape or DVD and a lot of them were awful. In the early to mid 80's we had some knockouts in the female department, but the guys were wiry and geeky. However, with Hardbodies, that all changed, because the lead (Grant Cramer)was a handsome man with charisma, and it ushered equality for both sexes.

Cramer plays Scotty, a typical L.A. drifter with no job, but probably gets by somehow. He has a steady girlfriend named Kristi (the lovely Teal Roberts) but lives in a dumpy apartment that he's way past due on rent. He also has a goofy looking friend named Rags (Courtney Gains) who hangs out with them. The story involves three middle-aged men who come to L.A. to have "philosophical discussions" with the babes of L.A., but they don't know how to approach them. They spot Scotty using his techniques (dialoguing and BBD) on various women and they soon ask him for his help. He refuses their offer of room and board at their swank beach house, but after getting evicted and sleeping under the boardwalk, he agrees to teach them his techniques.

Of course, what prevails afterwards are the typical: beach parties that last until dawn, music, the usual double-crosses, and the eventual plot resolution. Still, it's great fun. The acting is O.K., some are fine, others are gawd-awful. The music is cool (Vixen is in it). The ambiance is fun and the dialogue is fresh. Worth renting on VHS; I doubt it's on DVD, but avoid the sequel; it's a bore.

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3 out of 4 people found the following review useful:

'No redeeming social value'!

8/10
Author: Scott LeBrun (Hey_Sweden) from Canada
24 January 2012

Yeah, just the way we like it!

Seriously, I don't understand how it's possible to truly HATE something like this; it's not even that raunchy by the standards set by other 1980's sex comedies. It's just good, upbeat, breezy fun, without any real mean-spiritedness, a lot of good vibes, a generous dose of catchy pop & rock tunes, a nice, warm look, lively performances, and, of course, the opportunity to appreciate the truly attractive ladies in all of their glory. Handsome Grant Cramer ("New Year's Evil", "Killer Klowns from Outer Space") is unambitious slob Scotty, who does have the ability to charm women that a trio of hopeless, middle aged schmucks envies. So they hire him to teach them how to score. Simple enough story there, allowing us to look at all of the pleasing visual attractions and have some good laughs along the way. Girl group Vixen adds to the entertainment value by playing "Diaper Rash" (!), the group in the movie. Cramer is engaging, and Gary Wood, Michael Rapport, and singer / songwriter Sorrells Pickard are amusing as the unlucky guys, especially Pickard, the most likable of the three, who even serenades us with the priceless "I Don't (ahem) Fossils for Free." Courtney Gains ("Children of the Corn"'s Malachai!) is a hoot as Scotty's friend Rag, and the assorted sexy female cast members include appealing Teal Roberts as Scotty's love interest Kristi, Cindy Silver as Kimberly, Kristi Somers as Michelle, Crystal Shaw as Candy, Darcy DeMoss as Dede, Kathleen Kinmont as the roller skater, Marcia Karr as the hardbody on the stairs, veteran actress Joyce Jameson ("Death Race 2000") in a cameo near the end, and 70's exploitation pro Roberta Collins as the older and wiser Lana. And that's the younger Kane Hodder, in his first credited acting role, as the "older geek". They all make "Hardbodies" a pleasure to watch, along with the ability to learn just what the word "hardbodies" and the phrase "Bigger and Better Deal" (B.B.D. for short) mean. In any event, no fan of this sort of thing can fail to notice the plentiful dose of female flesh, and delight in it. In general, this movie is energetic, irresistible stuff, and even got itself a sequel two years later. Eight out of 10.

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