Hard Knox (1984)

A retired fighter pilot becomes the head of his alma matter military high school for two weeks with hilarious consequences. He shapes up the school and raises morale so that they are able ... See full summary »

Director:

Peter Werner

Writers:

Robert Conrad (story), David J. Kinghorn (story)

Stars:

Robert Conrad, Red West, Joan Sweeny

1 nomination.

Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
Robert Conrad	...	Col. Joe Knox
Red West	...	Thomas 'Top' Tuttle
Joan Sweeny	...	Marilyn Cole
Bill Erwin	...	Gen. Garfield
Dean Hill	...	Maj. Benjamin Garfield
Dianne B. Shaw	...	Lela Stallings
Stephen Caffrey	...	Gary Pascoe
Shane Conrad	...	Eric Shaner
Frank Howard	...	David Ambrose
Ricky Paull Goldin	...	Jeff Bridley
Alan Ruck	...	Frankie Tyrone
David Saunders	...	Bobby Sayers
Casey Siemaszko	...	Aaron Davis
Kathleen Sisk	...	Jessi Richards
Alex Stirling	...	Kimi

Storyline

A retired fighter pilot becomes the head of his alma matter military high school for two weeks with hilarious consequences. He shapes up the school and raises morale so that they are able to win the "brass-axe" competition versus another local military academy.

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Plot Keywords:

military | pilot | high school | leadership | teenage boy

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Genres:

Drama

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Details

Country:

USA

Language:

English

Release Date:

13 January 1984 (USA)

Also Known As:

Hard Knox, le casse-cou

Company Credits

Production Co:

A. Shane Company

Technical Specs

Runtime:

96 min

Sound Mix:

Mono

Color:

Color

Aspect Ratio:

1.33 : 1

Did You Know?

Trivia

The movie was shot in Mount Carroll, Illinois. That campus is now the home of the Campbell Center for Historical Preservation that educates museum curators from around the world.

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Goofs

When he is in his screen mom's car, actor Shane Conrad's hair is parted on his left and the left side of his shirt buttons over the right side (at around 4 mins), but as he is watches her drive off (from 15:10 to 15:25), the frames are flipped with his hair parted on his right and the right side of his shirt buttoned over the left side. Later, both the part in his hair and the buttoning of his shirt switch back (at around 39 mins).

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Quotes

[a military barber is shaving off Tyrone's mohawk]
Frankie Tyrone: Don't desecrate the colors, man... *I'll kill your dog, man!*

User Reviews

A retired Air Force colonel who takes himself way too seriously becomes dean of a co-ed military academy, followed by 90 straight minutes of every possible movie cliché.

"Hard Knox" is quite possibly the worst movie ever made, and I mean that as a serious compliment. Too many bad movies have some kind of redeeming quality to them -- an occasional funny line, a genuine moment of drama or romance or horror -- which makes them wholly unremarkable movies.

Fortunately, Hard Knox has none of those. The entire dialog and plot consists of one bad cliché after another. If these two-dimensional characters were any flatter, they'd be invisible. About 95% of the movie takes place in one setting -- the military academy -- so sadly, there's no bonus points for exceptionally bad special effects, but the dialog is so divorced from anything that would ever be uttered in reality, it easily makes up for it.

If you're the kind of viewer who enjoys really bad movies, I'd highly recommend dragging out the bong and throwing this bad boy on. But if you have a low tolerance of absolute sh*t, well, you'll probably never stumble across this movie anyways.