|Page 2 of 6:||     |
|Index||60 reviews in total|
This is a teen comedy heavily influenced by the Porky's movies. Phoebe
Cates, Betsy Russell and Matthew Modine star. A lot of older, very familiar
character actors also have roles. Basically we follow the events at a school
for girls, which happens to be very near a school for boys. Christine
(Cates) and Jim (Modine) are the main lovers but the story follows the
shenanigans of a number of characters.
There may be a shot of Phoebe's buns as she makes love to Modine along a beach, but others have surmised that a body double was used. Betsy gets some nice exposure in this one, including a topless ride on a horse. Another great scene involving Betsy results (as does the multiple female shower scene) from the boys dressing in drag and sneaking into the girls' dorm. Betsy recognizes Modine despite the wig and, since she has the hots for him, plays along pretending she is fooled by the disguise. She has Modine comment on her body as she takes her clothes off, stripping down to bra and panties then she slightly pulls her panties down exposing the top of her buns. Early in the movie Bubba pulls a towel off of her through a window and there are very nice (though brief) shots of her breasts and buns. Get the pause button ready. The final shot of the movie has all the girls, including Phoebe, mooning the dean of the school and there are a lot of nice, bare female arses on display. As for the multiple female shower scene, that is made possible by the script calling for the guys to dress in drag in order to sneak into the coed dorm and hook up with their girlfriends. Bubba heads off for the girls' locker room and spends a good deal of time inspecting the goods. When the girls come out to dress he hides in the sauna, only to get trapped in there when Miss Dutchbok (the great character actress Fran Ryan) enters to do a little sweating. The only girls I could identify in this scene are Playboy Playmate Lynda Wiesmeier and scream queen Brinke Stevens. According to the listing on The Internet Movie Database there are six girls listed as "school girls" in the credits, with Lynda being one of those. Brinke shows up lower as an uncredited school girl. I believe there are a total of seven girls in the showers so everything seems to add up. The other girls listed are Christy Curtis, Nadine Van der Velde, Lori Plager, Joni Lynn Ward, and Zetta Whitlow. Of these only Nadine and Zetta have credits for other films and television shows, but the name Lori Plager seems familiar for some reason. My guess is that some one with that name (or a very similar one) may have done a pictorial in Penthouse around the time of this films' release.
Once upon a time, long, long ago, there was no Internet. The world was
a dark and dreary place. There were no cellphones, no selfies, no
sexting. There were no porn sites filled with naked girls by the
thousands, open to teens with just a click of the "Yes, I'm an adult"
box. If you were a teen and your parents had a VCR (which cost about
$1,000 back then), you still couldn't go into the XXX section of your
local video rental store, if there was one. Heck, you couldn't even buy
-- or browse -- a Playboy magazine, legally.
So what was left? Weeellllll, you could actually do it in person, but that would require actually meeting a girl. It was all quite mysterious, back in the days before porn. So, for the sex-starved American male, there was the local movie theater, or, better yet, drive-in. Way back then, a little nudity went a long way to attracting audiences, at least males. And that's about all you get with "Private School."
Originality, you do not get. We get clumsily remade scenes from the great classics of teen porn, such as Animal House - 1978, specifically, the second story peeping Toms. We get the shower scenes in homage to Porky's - 1982. And we get a sex ed class, a la The Meaning of Life - March 1983. And then there were the cross-dressing scenes, which were original in Some Like it Hot, way back in 1959. Yawwwwn.
What's the difference between Private School and porn? Porn is more educational. We don't actually learn anything in the sex ed class scene, unlike The Meaning of Life and any self-respecting porno. What we do learn is that Sylvia Kristel, who is a surprisingly good actress, gives an incredibly bad performance, presumably on the demand of director Noel Black. Was this some sort of retribution for a lack of "cooperation"? (No, Kristel does not provide a "demonstration" in the movie.)
We should not forget Dan Greenburg and Suzanne O'Malley, credited with "writing" this movie (I wonder if they list it on their resume?). And who came up with the imaginative title: "Private School"?
Fortunately, Phoebe Cates is treated with more respect. I'm glad her career survived this flaming turkey. She was excellent in Gremlins. Where have you gone, Phoebe? You can come out of hiding now. All is forgiven!
If Private School were released today in a movie theater, would anyone show up? Would anyone stay to the end? Maybe. There are some people who actually enjoy stupid, bad movies. (Which raises the question of why I watched it. Answer: I stumbled on it in Leonard Maltin's book, and found the cast (Phoebe Gates AND Sylvia Kristel!!!??? (Don't be fooled: There is NO Phoebe and Sylvia scene) ) and rating of "BOMB" intriguing.) But the sex scenes wouldn't cut it, these days. Now, sex has to be graphic and dished out in heaping helpings, like Nymphomaniac, etc. Some mainstream movies are now nothing more than porn with better production values, like Titanic -- and unlike Private School, which had neither high production values, nor graphic sex.
Stay to the end? I dare you to make it past the credits! The title song is atrocious, repulsive and repeats a certain four-letter word, perhaps to help spice up the R rating. This movie is pure, shameless teensploitation. Perhaps it should be titled "Shameless."
Don't get me wrong: I have nothing against nudity, porn, or sex in movies, just snickering, un-erotic, sagging nudity. But, hey, if this movie turns you on, enjoy those hyper-hormones while you can. Youth is wasted on the young. Go out and meet a real girl. If you don't know what to do with her, watch some real porn. You won't learn anything at this "Private School."
OK, this one's a nostalgic kick of mine, I must admit. I was 21 years
old when it hit theaters, and I had already fallen in love with Phoebe
Cates after seeing her in FAST TIMES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH the previous
year. She's even more gorgeous throughout PRIVATE SCHOOL, but she's got
some serious competition from the equally stunning "bad girl" Betsy
Russell, who plays her sexy rival in this gratuitous teen sex comedy.
If it sounds like all I'm doing is drooling like an adolescent school boy, well -- no apologies here; this is just an all-out "the guys want to get into the girls pants" farce, and it's one of the "best" of the so-called "Eighties Sexploitation Genre", as far as these things go. There's not much need of a plot description necessary ... male students from a nearby Academy For Men try to crash a Private School For Girls to get their young rocks off. Man pursues wo-man, east and west meet. It's that simple. PRIVATE SCHOOL's got a good '80s music score, some funny scenes, and a lot of T&A (and even some C) on display for every red-blooded American male to gawk at. Also -- clueless and victimized teachers, stuffy parents, school pranks -- the usual formula, which is what we're there for. But in addition there's at least one respectable angle with "good girl" Cates being in love with Matthew Modine and their plans to "do it" for the first time, the right way, in a romantic getaway. Ray Walston, who was so memorable as Mr. Hand in FAST TIMES, returns in a small but welcome part as a perverted chauffeur. If you know what to expect and it's what you're looking for, dive in. If you don't go for this sort of thing, don't waste your (and my) time watching and whining about it. *** out of ****
Private School brings back memories of when I was a young kid in about
5th or 6th grade, and thinking I was pulling off the coup of a lifetime
figuring out a way to see a film such as this without my parents
In retrospect, the film seems like a vehicle for Mrs. Cates. Her swimming pool sequence in "Fast Times" the year before remains fondly remembered in cinematic history decades later. Ray Walston a.k.a "Mr. Hand" even turns up in a small role. However, the gorgeous Betsy Russell steals the show as Cates' arch-nemesis.
The soundtrack is surprisingly decent, and the movie today seems like nothing more than harmless T&A fun, with a romantic element which would surely appeal to the chick-flick crowd. Roger Ebert in fact gave this a higher star rating than 'Ridgemont' if you could believe that. On the basis of Betsy Russell's presence, I can't say I blame him. This woman is smoking hot. Up there with the greatest babes of all time.
Private School = An '80s classic. It is impossible for any red blooded heterosexual male to not fall in love with Betsy Russell. If you consider yourself a fan of Fast Times At Ridgemont High, it works as an unofficial sequel. . . if nothing else.
Rated R for Sexual Content,Nudity and Language
Private School is one of the many 1980's teen sex comedies released.I enjoy the teen film genre and I have seen a few of the sex comedies from the 80's.I would say "The Last American Virgin" is the greatest 80's teen sex comedy because it is fairly funny and also has a good mix of realistic drama as well.Anyway I saw Private School and I thought it was decent.Its nothing special really.If you like the genre, then you will like this movie, if you don't like the genre, then you wont like this movie.Its as simple as that.It stars Phoebe Cates who previously was in Fast Times At Ridgemont High(Mr.Hand from that film also plays a role).Its basically about girls at a private school who cause trouble and try to be with their boyfriends at the all boys academy.Pretty entertaining, funny at times but nothing special.
I'm giving it a seven, which I will admit would be high if my enjoyment had anything to do with just dialogue or story content. But honestly, I'm about to buy the DVD, because there is no CD of the soundtrack available, if there ever even was one, but it's why I used to watch the movie again and again whenever it came on the tube. I have seen something about some CD, but with only 5 of the movie's songs on it, and not available for sale!!! But, if everybody burned out on that Big Chill soundtrack, hopefully everybody by now if not ten years ago already, then this is it, the best movie soundtrack there is! Only, you can't buy the soundtrack, so, you have to just watch the movie! Not a great movie, nothing to study with the lights off or even make popcorn for, but if you like music, for that reason, you might enjoy watching this, perhaps just some weekend afternoon when you are just moping about the house and would have been flipping channels with the remote if you weren't watching the movie, under those conditions, if you like music, you might also like the movie, and perhaps wonder why they don't sell a complete soundtrack to the movie! (Okay, The Big Chill soundtrack album/CD didn't include The Rolling Stone's "You can't always get what you want," but it had the rest.) I've searched the web repeatedly, no soundtrack release for this movie ever seems to have existed. And yet, it's an absolutely great one! So, for the music, and the fact I'm even going to buy the DVD, just to hear all the music again, I'm giving it a 7. So there!
Well I loved Private Schools it makes me VERY HAPPY,Excellent movie,
nice soundtrack,good production. I just love this type of films just
like like "The New Guy","Bring It On","Not Another Teenagers
Movie","Meatballs",(maybe called Teenagers movies)... You know this
kind of movies they make me real happy, they make me remember my school
mates,the summer,its hard to explain my feeling.I could see this kind
of movies over and over and over again.
The character i most liked was Bubba hes so funny and just hes face when seeing a chick makes me laugh.
Overall: This movies are AWESOME!!
*** This review may contain spoilers ***
This was an awesomely bad 80's film. The fact you could run a Mack Truck through the plot line is a moot point. You have a very hot Betsy Russell riding on top of a horse topless, Russell's shower scene, and her seducing of Modine is glorious. Phoebe Cates is hot as well but the Hubba Hubba award goes to Betsey. Plus this movie has My Favorite Martian "Mr. Hand" as a horny limo driver making out with the school master, what great fun. The biggest reason I like the film is nostalgia. I loved watching this film as a kid and watching it brings me back in time. If I was Greek I would say OPA! An Oscar type film no, a good film no, but it beats watching infomercials!
OK as I said this is a teen movie so it needs to have hot girls, show
enough skin, have stupid (in the good way) humor and be anti authority.
This movie has it all. It isn't the best in it's respective genre but
it is good enough to keep you entertained.
The negative (or positive you decide) of this movie is that it leans a little heavy on the tits and ass and sometimes neglects the other elements of the movie. Don't believe me look at the box shots, they just look like a cheap porn.
The only thing I don't get is why an exclusive girl and boy school would be build so close to each other and have that level of interaction it kinda beats the point of having a separated school in the first place. I guess it feeds into the male fantasy or something.
I love Phoebe Cates. So I had to give this movie a ten, even though I might be insane for doing so. I noticed that there were some goofs in the postings for this movie. I found another one. In the riding seen, Jim is sitting with Christine on the fence when Jordan decides to go "topless". When Bubba starts to chase her on his horse, you can see Jim running behind him. He is no longer on the fence. How many times do you think I had to see this movie to come up with that one? Martin Mull has a small role as the pharmacist in the drugstore where Christine is trying to buy condoms. He is not listed in the credits. Also, I noticed that Paula Abdul was in the credits for organizing the dance sequence. This must have been even before her singing career. She was a cheerleader for the Lakers' basketball team. This must have been one of her first jobs.
|Page 2 of 6:||     |
|Plot summary||Ratings||External reviews|
|Parents Guide||Plot keywords||Main details|
|Your user reviews||Your vote history|