Octopussy (1983) Poster



Vijay: Is he still there?

Q: You must be joking! Double-0 seven on an island populated exclusively by women? We won't see him till dawn!

[Bond and Q are floating in a hot air balloon]

James Bond: I trust you can handle this contraption, Q?

Q: It goes by hot air.

James Bond: Oh, then you can.

[after Bond has escaped]

Kamal Khan: Mr. Bond is indeed of a very rare breed... soon to be made extinct.

Q: [being kissed by Octopussy's girls after knocking out a bandit] Cut it out! We don't have time for that! Later perhaps.

Octopussy: Who is he?

Kamal Kahn: Englishman. Likes eggs, preferably Faberge, and dice, preferably loaded.

James Bond: [bad guys are chasing Bond and Vijay] Vijay, we've got company!

Vijay: No problem, this is a company car.

[car accelerates through crowds]

James Bond: [looking at the tattoo on Magda's back] What is that?

Magda: That's my little octopussy.

[Vijay has just stopped some bad guys with his tennis racket]

Vijay: Game, set and match!

Front Desk Clerk: I hope you have a pleasant stay.

[Bond eyes a beauty nearby who smiles at him]

James Bond: I'm, ah, sure I will.

[first lines]

James Bond: You didn't tell me there was going to be this much security.

Bianca: They moved the flight up to this afternoon.

James Bond: Well, we're going to have to go ahead as planned anyway.

[Bianca hands an ID badge with the name 'Luis Toro' to Bond]

James Bond: Toro. Sounds like a load of bull.

Jim Fanning: [after Bond bids for the egg] Have you gone mad?

James Bond: Let's see how badly he wants it.

Octopussy: A paid assassin.

James Bond: When I kill it is on the specific orders of my Government.

Orlov: [enters the trailer, sees Bond in Mischka's 'Twin One' clothes from behind and mistakes him for Mischka] Leave that! Let's go.

James Bond: [turns around, facing Orlov with pointed gun] Let's stay. Sit on that box. Hands on your knees. Come on, move! Now why is that bomb on the train?

Orlov: Who are you?

James Bond: I'm British Secret Service.

Orlov: You should be more concerned about getting out of here alive.

James Bond: I am more concerned about an atomic bomb exploding on a US Air Force base in West Germany! You surely can't be inviting a nuclear war? What happens when the US retaliates?

Orlov: [grinning] Against whom?

James Bond: [frowning, realizing Orlov's scheme] My God... of course. Our early-warning system will rule out the bomb having come from Russia or anywhere else. Everyone will assume incorrectly... that it was a American bomb triggered accidentally.

Orlov: Yes, that would be the most plausible explanation.

James Bond: Europe and NATO will then insist on full nuclear disarmament... and leaving every border undefended for you and the Warsaw Pact to walk across at will!

Orlov: You took the words right out of my mouth.

James Bond: And I suppose it doesn't matter a damn to you that thousands of innocent people will be killed in this little "accident" of yours?

Orlov: Better than letting a handful of old men in Moscow bargain away our advantage in disarmament talks!

James Bond: On your feet, General. You're going to stop that train.

Orlov: [they hear hoot as the train starts to move off] It's too late.

James Bond: You can stop it at the border.

[suddenly the door opens. Bond turns around to see a Russian soldier. Bond kills the soldier before he manages to point his rifle, and meanwhile Orlov escapes]

[Confronting James Bond]

Kamal Khan: You seem to have this nasty habit of surviving.

James Bond: You know what they say about the fittest.

Kamal Khan: Spend the money quickly, Mister Bond.

James Bond: [handing Q his coat] Do you think you can help me? Someone seems to have stuck a knife in my wallet.

Q: Oh, and missed you, did they? What a pity!

Magda: He suggests a trade. The egg for your life.

James Bond: Well, I heard the price of eggs was up, but isn't that a little high?

[Bond is dragged from a river onto a tour boat]

Woman on Tour Boat: Are you with our group?

James Bond: No, ma'am, I'm with the economy tour!

Q: [Q is demonstrating a pen filled with acid] Dissolves all metals.

James Bond: Wonderful for poison pen letters...

Q: Pay attention, 007!

M: Remember, 007, you're on your own.

James Bond: Well, thank you, sir. That's a great comfort.

James Bond: [using Kamal's loaded dice to beat him in backgammon] Double sixes. Fancy that!

[last lines]

[Bond is in traction]

Octopussy: I wish...

James Bond: What?

Octopussy: I wish you weren't in such a weakened condition.

[Bond releases himself from traction]

Octopussy: Oh, James.

[Bond kisses Octopussy passionately]

Octopussy: James!

Kamal Khan: [preparing to leave the circus, where a bomb is placed] General, excuse me. I have some traveling arrangements to make. Enjoy the show.

US general: Thank you.

US aide: I'm sure the general will get a big blast out of this.

Kamal Khan: I know he won't be disappointed.

James Bond: [handing a wad of Indian cash to his accomplice] That should keep you in curry for a few weeks.

Magda: I guess this is good night.

James Bond: I could come in for a nightcap.

[Gobinda puts a hand in front of Magda's door]

James Bond: Some other time perhaps.

James Bond: [Gobinda walks Bond back to his room] I don't suppose you'd care for a nightcap?

[Q's mechanized version of the "Indian Rope Trick" malfunctions]

James Bond: Having trouble getting it up, Q?

[Twin Two throws several knives at Bond, which pass through his clothes, pinning him to a cabin door]

Twin Two: [draws another knife] And this... for my brother...

[Bond plucks one of the knives from the door, and throws it at Twin Two, hitting him fatally in his stomach]

James Bond: And that's for 009!

Kamal Khan: Have a seat and play Mister... uh...

James Bond: Bond, James Bond.

James Bond: [the real Col. Luis Toro has found Bond] Well, it's small world. You're a Toro, too!

Magda: I need refilling.

[General Orlov tries to board the circus train, but is shot down by the German border guards. General Gogol, who by now learned about Orlov's scheme, approaches the fatally-injured man, looking at him disdainfully]

General Anatoly Gogol: [contemptuously] A common thief. A disgrace to the uniform!

Orlov: Yes, but tomorrow, I shall be a hero of the Soviet Union.

[despite his pain, Orlov smiles faintly, and then dies]

James Bond: [runs into a tiger in the jungle] Sit!

Q: There's no time for that... later perhaps.

Fakir: [Bond fights one of the thugs, throwing him onto a bed of nails] Get out of my bed!

Gobinda: The Englishman has escaped!

Kamal Khan: He won't go very far. We'll track him.

James Bond: [he tosses all his money to the crowd] Easy comes, easy goes!

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