Max Dugan Returns (1983)
Michael McPhee: Can you make money from philosophy?
Max Dugan: Yeah, if you have the right one.
Michael McPhee: He's gonna go into philosophy.
Nora McPhee: Why?
Michael McPhee: 'Cause that's what he wanted.
Nora McPhee: Who told you that?
Michael McPhee: Mr. Wittgenstein.
Nora McPhee: Who's Mr. Wittgenstein?
Michael McPhee: Mr. Parker.
Nora McPhee: Mr. Parker is Mr. Wittgenstein?
Nora McPhee: Umm... oh... what did he tell you?... Look, don't go into uhh, what's his name's room. I think there's something severely wrong with him!
Max Dugan: Uh, do you want me to get that?
Nora McPhee: It's the police!
Max Dugan: Nevermind.
Nora McPhee: How do I know you have six months to live?
Max Dugan: We could sit here and wait.
Nora McPhee: Michael, go do your homework...
Nora McPhee: There isn't something in his room that does his homework is there?
Michael McPhee: [looking at the new refrigerator] It has an ice crusher!
Nora McPhee: Don't crush ice! Don't crush anything! It's a mistake! It doesn't belong to us!
Max Dugan: My name isn't Parker.
Michael McPhee: Its not?
Max Dugan: No. Its Wittgenstein.
Michael McPhee: Wittgenstein?
Max Dugan: Gus Wittgenstein.
Max Dugan: Maybe I'm your father, but you're not my daughter. Do you know what Kierkegaard once said?
Nora McPhee: Yes! And I'm not interested in any more of your roommates!
Nora McPhee: The car was stolen! Didn't they tell you that?
Brian Costello: They tell me when other people's cars get stolen. They don't tell me when it's mine.
Max Dugan: [Mike points the camcorder at Max] No, Mike, not me.
Michael McPhee: Why not?
Max Dugan: Well, certain primitive tribes believe that pictures steal your soul, and I don't have too much soul.
Max Dugan: You've got enough dirty deals in your life. Don't turn your back on a payoff.
Nora McPhee: I have to go. I have to live my life. I have to appear calm and intelligent, I am dating a person. We will discuss this when I get home.
Max Dugan: You won it.
Nora McPhee: What?
Max Dugan: On a TV show.
Nora McPhee: I was never on a TV show!
Max Dugan: It was one of those TV shows you don't have to be on. I was finishing up the breakfast dishes when there's a knock at the door , and in comes a lawyer with a blue suit...
Nora McPhee: No.
Max Dugan: No?
Nora McPhee: No, no. I don't think I won this, I never won anything in my life. This is a mistake!
Max Dugan: But it had your name and address on the invoice. I signed for you. Now, she'll probably have to go down and do a few publicity pictures but the stuff is yours.
Michael McPhee: Maybe it's on the six o'clock news!
Nora McPhee: It's not on the six o'clock news, just turn that off and put everything down... a man with a blue suit, huh?