Memorable quotes for
The World According to Garp (1982) More at IMDbPro »

[noticing scantily clad prostitutes]
Jenny Fields: Is that the latest fashion?
T. S. Garp: No, Mom, that's the oldest profession.
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Roberta: I mean, I had mine removed surgically under general anesthesia. But to have it bitten off in a Buick...
Jenny Fields: It's lust!
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T. S. Garp: [after being told he shouldn't go to his Mom's feminist memorial] I will grieve alone for the rest of my life, but right now I want to be around people who loved her.
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T. S. Garp: [to his mother Jenny] I never needed a father.
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T. S. Garp: We'll take the house. Honey, the chances of another plane hitting this house are astronomical. It's been pre-disastered. We're going to be safe here."
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Walt: Daddy what's gradual school?
T. S. Garp: What?
Walt: Gradual school. Mommy say's she teaches at gradual school.
T. S. Garp: Oh Gradual school is where you go to school and you gradually find out you don't want to go to school anymore.
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[last lines]
T. S. Garp: Remember, Helen.
Helen Holm: What, my love?
T. S. Garp: Everything.
Helen Holm: Yes, my love.
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Roberta: [telling Garp he cannot go to his mother's feminist memorial] They're not going to allow any men. A man *killed* her! They're very *upset*!
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Jenny Fields: You know, everybody dies. My parents died. Your father died. Everybody dies. I'm going to die too. So will you. The thing is, to have a life before we die. It can be a real adventure having a life.
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[while telling Dean Bodger and her son about his father, who was a brain damaged WW2 veteran with spontaneous erections she was the nurse of]
Jenny Fields: Where was I?
T. S. Garp: He kept having erections.
Jenny Fields: Thank you. He was dying. I wanted a child. It was a good way to have one without the bother of a husband around... who had legal rights to my body. So, one night at work... when the wounded and maimed were all asleep, I went to him. He was asleep. But his erection was there, as always. I removed my undergarments and climbed on top of him. He woke up then. He said the only word other than his name that I ever heard him utter. He said, "good." It didn't take very long, and that once was all that was needed.
Dean Bodger: You raped him! You raped a dying man!
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Mrs. Fields: [first lines] Garp? Garp?
Jenny Fields: Yes, Garp.
Mr. Fields: Garp. Garp?
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T. S. Garp: [to his infant son in baby carriage] Don't be a baby, Duncan! Say da-da!
[Duncan blows raspberry at Garp]
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T. S. Garp: Men die young in my family, Helen!
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Randy - Dog's Head Mansion: [to Roberta] Hey you! Dildo. Is this the nut house where you're keeping my Laurel?
Roberta: Laurel's here but we're not exactly keeping her.
Randy - Dog's Head Mansion: Bullshit, ya big dyke.
Roberta: I'm not a dyke. Is Laurel expecting you?
Randy - Dog's Head Mansion: I'll kill you douchebag.
Roberta: That's all you men understand is violence.
Randy - Dog's Head Mansion: Now look. I know what sort of freaks hang around here. It's a big lesbian scene.
[Garp walks on to porch]
Randy - Dog's Head Mansion: Ooooh, oooh, what are you the man of the house or the court eunuch. Laurel, you in there you bitch!
Jenny Fields: Hello.
Randy - Dog's Head Mansion: Oh, I know who you are. My Laurel's not your type sweetie.
Jenny Fields: Perhaps she's not your type either.
Randy - Dog's Head Mansion: Listen, goddammit. If you don't get Laurel's ass out here I'm gonna...
[Randy is knocked down by Roberta]
Laurel - Dog's Head Mansion: Randy!
Jenny Fields: Are you alright?
Laurel - Dog's Head Mansion: Baby, you found me.
Randy - Dog's Head Mansion: Oh, I don't think I can drive the fuckin' car.
Laurel - Dog's Head Mansion: That's alright. I can drive you just never let me.
[to Jenny]
Laurel - Dog's Head Mansion: I guess Randy needs me.
Randy - Dog's Head Mansion: Easy!
[In pain as Laurel helps him to the car]
Laurel - Dog's Head Mansion: Sorry baby, I'm sorry.
Randy - Dog's Head Mansion: Crazy dyke blind-sided me.
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